You are stuck in traffic and you feel an overwhelming feeling of explosive diarrhea coming on. What do you do?

[Anonymous]

Awful scenario: You get stuck in really bad traffic and an overwhelming feeling of explosive diarrhea hits you like a ton of bricks. You need to take a huge shit. What the hell do you do?

Pull over on the side of the road and take a shit in front of everyone

Shit your pants

This question is making me cry just thinking about it

Other

Updates

+1 y

Always keep a box of tissues and/or a roll of toilet paper in your vehicle folks.

[super147]

The best option would be to try and pull the car over and run to any discrete spot that you can find, such as behind a bush or a tree. If that is impossible then use your car doors, front and rear, as shields and squat in between them. It's either that or shit yourself in your car seat and drive home in your own shit.

Love the question though, lol!

[Asker]

LOOOOLLLL I'm sorry but I was stuck in traffic earlier and this scenario popped in my head and I thought it was tragic. hahaha

[super147]

hahaha! You crack me up! xD

I said about the using the front and rear doors as shields because I saw a woman do this exact thing when stuck in the car in front of mine in traffic. She as only peeing but she squatted between the two open doors. I know that she was peeing because the road had a slight incline and the stream of pee started trickling towards my car. I was thinking "If that shit gets on my tyres I'm going to run you down!!" >:( lmao

[Asker]

hahaha when you gotta go, you gotta go!

[cross98]

"If that shit gets on my tyres I'm going to run you down!!" lmfao omg !!

[yofuknutz]

Thanks a lot guys I'm on the toilet and if I was in that situation I would be pissed about choosing not having baby wipes available nor my bidet washlet that pissed me off one time a guy trying to come in and the Walmart bathroom I was in and I think the smell alone turned him away otherwise I would have had to pull my pistol on him

[TripleAce]

Keep a safety emergency poop kit

Wet naps, extra pair of undies and a box of kleenex. Might as well add in paper bags too. Throw in some no water soap. Hand sanitizer

You'll be diarrhea ready anytime. So ready you'll wish for a situation just to use your trusty poop kit

[Asker]

hahaha

[yofuknutz]

I like the way you think let's get wasted together and fuck shit up

[TheLuckyPizzaDog]

Try to hold it in til the next exit or turn off to a store or restaurant.
But I mean, I have a mini trash can in my car and I always have napkins and hand sanitizer. I could probably just pull over to the side of the road.

[Anonymous]

Grab a plastic bag since I usually have those lying somewhere in the car, shit in that, cry about it internally, tie the bag up, close the windows and suffer the scent till I get home then dispose of it

[moonpie89]

i have lots of clothes in my car so I'll just pile them under me

[Anonymous]

Hold it till I can find a toilet or till I get home

[Toad-1]

Good luck lol

[Opinion Owner]

@Toad-1 I already do it so

[Toad-1]

Yeah but this is 'explosive' diarrhea. Holding that int is very challenging. I only know from experience sadly. 😔

[Opinion Owner]

@Toad-1 I know it was the same I talked about you know. And I hold it.
You don't? You shit in your pants?

[Toad-1]

I made it cause I was close... but if I had been far away like stuck in traffic on a freeway it's very hard to hold in

[Hans222]

I've had the problem. Fortunately there was a parking (without toilets) nearby.
You don't want to know what happened next. And in an emergency, you simply don't care! A nuke was going off inside of me.
I was on antibiotics and they took their toll on me :-(

[dangerDoge]

*looks in back of car*
*sees some grocery bags*

If bottles worked for my friend's cross country bus piss incidences of high school, I'm sure some bags will work explosive diarrhea.

Hopefully.
Welp, in any case, looking like I'll be making a quick trip for some bottles of febreeze.

[CyberToothTiger]

Keep toilet paper in the vehicle and just shit right there on the seat.
I had Colitis of the bowel in November and i had diarrhea 8 times or
more in one hour and it was horrible. Finally i ended up at the ER
was admitted for dehydration and put on IV antibiotics and fluids
it was one horrible experience.

[cross98]

the hell... sorry you went through that.

[CyberToothTiger]

@cross98 Yeah it was something. Thanks for your thoughtfulness :)

[cross98]

don't worry i had hemmorhoids (however you spell it).

[CyberToothTiger]

@cross98 Oh wow hope you feel better i had them too ugh

[cross98]

yeah, they're gone.. hope i don't speak too soon. thanks for sympathizing.

[CyberToothTiger]

@cross98 You're welcome anytime :))

[Pac-Man]

😭😭😭

img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aprPg15_460s.jpg

[Asker]

oh god O_O

[Pac-Man]

It's like she doesn't even know lmao

[cross98]

ohh goodness wtf

[bedroomdweller]

I I can't hold it I'd grab a bag and shit in it. I'd worry about wiping my ass later.

Getting creative with the questions eh

[Asker]

hahaha I can't stop laughing

[Red_Arrow]

About your update - is that to cover the pile of shit you leave in the center lane of the highway during rush hour?

[scragbas]

roll down the window, stick my ass out, unleash the fury.

[dudeman]

lol almost pissed myself at work a week ago. i pissed in a monster can instead. fuck it im not pissing my pants.

[ToruMatsuda]

Lolll well I just hope no one records what will happen💩💩 something close happened once but wasn't stuck in traffic

[GymBumGuy]

cdn.meme.am/.../53434671.jpg

[astrOnaut01]

I would hold it in for dear life. Maybe lay down some tissues to sit on.. Just in case

[HarrisonWells]

Pull over, and make a run to the nearest bathroom or wooded area.

[red_knight]

scream at the cars ahead or just turn on my hazards and run into the next building nearby

[Anonymous]

I have modified my vechele by replacing the drivers seat with a bathroom from a rv so I would just say winning and take a shit in traffic

[Bleh-___-]

Squeeze my anus as hard as humanly possible.

[blustar]

that's never happened and never will happen.

👌👌👌👌👌

[truthbeknown]

Grip the wheel tighter and PRAY!

[Waffles731]

Shit in the floor mat in the back seat

[Toad-1]

It's unfortunate but A. My health > embarrassment

[Toad-1]

I'd try my best to find a good hiding spot though before I went

[SadpersonT]

Hold it in bruh

[yofuknutz]

I got pulled over by a cop I was rushing home and I saw him my asshole puckered up he's a sergeant to he's let me go

[Ephemera1]

Jokes on the rhea, I wear scented diapers.

[AleDeEurope]

Open the window.

[Dred1614returns]

Hold it.