Do you think it's necessary to apologize even if you don't think you did anything wrong?

[witherwing]

So basically, if someone feels hurt or offended by something you did or said (or allegedly did or said), do you feel it's still necessary to apologize, even if you personally don't think you did anything wrong? Personally I hate when I have to apologize for something I didn't do, because I used to have a friend who made me apologize for everything, but he never apologize to me for anything. Now I feel if it's not sincere, there is no point. Everyone can say the words sorry, but to actually mean it, it's a different thing. On the other hand, if a small gesture like that makes a person feel better, then why not just say it?

Yes, it's necessary apologize every time.

No, it's not necessary to apologize, if I didn't do anything wrong.

It's only necessary to apologize in some situations. (Please elaborate)

[govegirl]

If you have said or done something that has hurt someone else's feelings, it is not up to you to decide whether or not their feelings should be hurt. there's a difference between saying "I am sorry I offended you", and "I am sorry you feel offended. But I didn't do anything wrong." If they're always getting offended over really trivial things then you probably need to sit down with them and tell them to not be so self centred and find a way to get offended by someone else's actions all the time. Because certainly people act like the victim over things that don't even make sense. But if you have done something, whether you think it is offensive or not, if it has hurt someone else feelings then you should apologise for doing that.

[butterbiscuits]

It's easier to move forward with the conversation if you just apologize and appease the person who felt wronged. There have been plenty of times where I thought I said or did nothing wrong but the person was clearly upset by what happened. A lot of people like to blame someone for everything and they just can't move forward without having that moment. For those people I say "OK I'm sorry, next time maybe we can do this so we avoid this situation." To me, they're just words but to others they mean a lot and go a long way.

[mshuda19]

I totally agree with you dear

[vulpesinculta]

No, it's never necessary to apologise for something if you don't think you're wrong.

However, sometimes I have apologised to people I hold dear if I've upset them but I will explain how I'm not sorry about what I did, just that they've taken it negatively. That annoys some people even more than a fake apology/not apologising at all though.

[Brutus300]

I agree with you y does no one want u to b urself

[Galemead]

I had a roommate that expected me to apologize all the time to her, but when my feelings were hurt, she would never apologize to me. So people like that are the exception with me. To everyone else, I apologize if I realize or they tell me I hurt them.

[Nivinxus]

No. Being sorry when you feel like you aren't in the wrong or when someone else can't explain why you are wrong only damages the integrity of you apologies in the future.

I'm not interested in treating adults like kids, yeah, they may be in distress, but I'm not planning to hold their hand all the time. Sometimes they have to face the truth and just move on.

Saying sorry just to calm a person down even though they are wrong just makes me feel like I'm admitting something I did wrong when I didn't really do anything wrong.

[CarloSpicyWeiner]

Apologies are overused, typically as a means of seeking approval from others, but also when trying to avoid accountability. Apologies are most appropriate, when something was done unintentionally, that caused harm. I once spent an entire year not allowing myself to say the word sorry and it fundamentally changed how I interacted with people. It forced me to take ownership of my actions, motives and desires; especially when I had every right to behave selfishly and no reason to apologize for someone else's sense of social entitlement.

[Thia18]

I hate apologizing! I’m so stubborn. My dad also doesn’t like saying sorry. It’s funny, because we’ll get into an argument on politics... Ignore each other the whole day because we don’t back down... Then the next day either he or I will text the other one something funny or nice and we’ll be good lol I think I get my stubbornness must win an argument from him❤️

[BikerGirl89]

Yes, it is necessary. The reason why is because, it is not up to you to decide how you made them feel. What you may not find to be offensive, they do.

This is why it is important to think twice before you say something. What is petty to us, is serious to another.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If that's the case you'll be walking on egg shells your whole and apologizing non stop for every little still thing this PC society gets upset for.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

*silly

[Shreyash108]

It's nice to see a deep question like that to which i can connect too..
I don't apologize someone until and unless i feel that i have done something wrong , although the fact that it's just a small gesture but still isn't it a lie...
Thank you and sorry are two words that people use way too often but rarely mean it...

So i will go with this:
No, its not necessary to apologise , if i didn't do anything wrong.

[MrMysteryMan]

I'm Canadian, and it sometimes feels like we apologize for not walking the same way someone else does. But I hate to apologize for something I never did. I'll own up to my mistakes, but I will also be proud of the things I did right and expect others to own up to their own mistakes. I may even call you out if you are wrong. Or I'll say sorry for making you feel that way, but this is how it is...

[MrMysteryMan]

Fuck we all want honesty, but when it comes to honesty that hurts, we'd rather have the white lie. We're pretty hypocritical beings.

[Bluntly]

Yeah over apologizing just devalues the words. Then it becomes even harder to express a genuine apology sincerely :/

[MrMysteryMan]

@Bluntly Exactly. Also, how are you going to know if you are actually in the wrong if someone doesn't show you that you are wrong?

[Bluntly]

Soo true MrMysteryMan. I believe integrity is key. Besides a fake apology could just create more doubt in the relationship. Not worth it in my opinion.

[Bas96]

I'm a very friendly person. I apologize and thank people in pretty much any case. Even when they mean it in a sarcastic way, I still thank them or apologize to them. I'm not Canadian by the way. I just want people to appreciate me. And the best way is by appreciating them. In this case you can make connections or friends more easily. Since they don't see you as an enemy or threat to their popularity.

[Vmm90]

Well in my case this gentleman thought he had done nothing wrong so I explained why I was upset. In my case I had just reason to be upset like I was. Sometimes we can't control how others will react and that's no ones fault but sometimes where we think we have done nothing we actually have... mind you I'd like to point out I didn't demand an apology.

If you're friend is making you apologize then that's not right because I feel like it's a way for them to be in control of you in a way.

[Casey10101]

I would, but just for the sake, to spare a second, to calm someone else, before an unneeded argument. If it stops someone from getting butt hurt, then its really nothing to me. because Id rather, say sorry and make up, than have to go though a conversation about how hurt someone is, even when I feel I did nothing wrong. so to spare my time, and theirs, I would.

[0112358]

I tell them i'm sorry they felt that way, though it wasn't my intention to be offensive, or i'm sorry things turned out that way.

I used to just apologize in grey areas because I didn't care, but I found some people like that, once you apologized, its' like they would then remember forever that it had been your fault. So I had to have the fucking dumb fights with them every time over stupid shit to avoid that.

[Alan180188]

"once upon a time" when I was a loving caring person, I would apologize cause I was thinking that the feeling we share and the person themselves are way important than any subject or situation no matter how bad or critical it is, cause life is short and it's not worth it...

[king_komino]

I don't like to apologize for anything really. Unless I feel I really should. What's the point. Just because you're sorry doesn't mean everything will magically be okay. I would never apologize if I feel I did nothing wrong. I feel like that's disrespectful to yourself.

[Groisu]

It depends if it's some meaningless drivel that unintentionally upset someone then just go ahead and apologize but if someone is being irrational then it's not my fault they can't accept that something is just flat out wrong and I shouldn't be responsible for justifying there bullshit

[YHL6965]

If someone feels offended, I'll ask him/her what offended him/her. If it's legit and I was accidently being actually offensive, I'll apologize. But if he/she is just one of these snowflakes that is offended by anything and everything, he/she can fuck off.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Agree 100%

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If I can honestly see I clearly did nothing wrong then why should I say sorry? I only apologize if I know I screwed up big time or offended someone by something harsh or inapporiate; not because some whinly little cry baby got his or her feelings hurt for something extremly petty.

[TheLuckyPizzaDog]

No. If you don't regret it then don't apologize for it. It's insincere. At most, I'll be sorry that they feel offended, and I'll try to keep from doing/saying whatever set them off. I wouldn't want a hollow apology from someone else either.

[Paris13]

Sometimes, One, hun, Has to Say "I'm Sorry" to Keep the Peace, Even if they Didn't... Do anything. That's a Big Person.
However, It takes a Big Someone to Say "I'm sorry." And in this Day in Age, Hard to Find. xx

[Couchy]

Good manners is the glue that binds a civilisation together, unless a person's a malignant narcissistic pig ie a person who never apologises, then screw them and the high horse they rode in on.

[Kuraj]

I never apologize, because it would never be sincere.
If someone feels hurt or offended by my actions it is their problem.
I obviously always view my actions rightful and just, otherwise I wouldn't be performing them.

[HOAAH]

It's not your job to always make the other person happy. You can't apologize if you didn't do anything on purpose to make someone angry.

[madgoat]

I'm sincerely sorry that you feel hurt by my actions but I don't agree I did you wrong.
You're validating their feelings while asserting your view of the facts.

[notallthere98]

"When a person tells you that you hurt them, you don’t get to decide that you didn’t."
-Louis C. K