I am raising my son as a decent human being. I don't push one thing or another into his face and I don't disapprove of things he finds interest in that others might think are for another gender or whatever.
I don't care if he's straight or gay or prefers action and adventure over whatever. He likes Ninjago, Minecraft, Skyrim, likes watching me play Fallout 4 and does Karate... And when he was younger he used to watch Frozen, Sofia the whatever Disney Princess she was, and that Sheriff Cat Cowgirl show with the talking cactus that was next to useless.
He likes what he likes just as I did growing up. I am not going to go and fk with his head by telling him he has to do this or that in order to become "A Man." and I sure as hell ain't going to mess him up by suddenly treating him in a stereotypical manner like he's a girl from yesteryear.
Wtf is that going to accomplish
What specific advantages would that provide over my parents raising me in the 80s and 90s providing everyone with respect and treating others as I would want to be treated?
I'm not some wife beater, or child molester, nor am I some rapist, cheater or completely insensitive jackass. I don't treat women any differently than the next guy.
Would I have magically become more enlightened and even more of a better person if my parents decided to treat me as a female to somehow be more "Gender Neutral?"
It doesn't frigging work that way anymore than sending your gay son off to Bible Camp and expecting it to magically turn them straight.
What the hell is wrong with having a defined gender? I got a dick and that person down the road has a vagina. I'm a male and there isn't anything frigging wrong with that.
You want gender neutrality?
Lop your penises off, lop your breasts off and stitch up your vaginas. There ya go... No more genders.
Have fun with that. I'll be over here with the rest of us "Normal" human beings who don't have an issue with being who we are and respecting other people's differences.
No, that's retarded. People who think that this is a good thing want to pretend that we're the same, that there's no biological difference between boys and girls/men and women when there obviously are. They think that if we just raise them in a gender neutral way that we can achieve gender equality, and they falsely believe that gender is entirely learned rather than being innate.
In reality all this does is cause confusion for the kids, and as a result a lot of these kids have an identity crisis which leads to all kinds of mental illnesses, particularly depression. Liberals claim that the reason so many young men today commit suicide is because of traditional gender roles, but actually young boys have increasingly been encouraged to act like girls as masculinity has become increasingly demonised. They've either been emasculated or encouraged to feel shame about their natural inclinations. Also because of this demonisation of masculinity many feel like they no longer have a place in the world.
Your responses to those who support this shows this to be true. You, just like them, have that mindset that masculinity is something to be corrected. Really, masculinity is completely natural. You keep saying "yea no more boys will be boys excuses". The solution to this isn't to raise them like they're girls - to raise them to be something they're not, in a way that is completely against their nature - instead it's simply to raise them not to be assholes.
No strong society in our entire history has raised it's sons to be effeminate - that's usually the sign of a degenerate culture on the path towards collapse. Men have and always will be the protectors of any culture, of the women and children. In order to do this they need to be raised to be strong, not to become passive weaklings. Teaching positive masculinity - strength with responsibility, with respect for women, is much better than the former.
I think that's a terrible idea. I'm really hoping this gender neutral thing is just a fad. Males and females both have their strengths and weaknesses. ie Males are typically physically strong, can make decisive decisions without letting their emotions cloud their judgement and usually are gifted in skills that are good at manual jobs. However they usually lack patience, empathy and the ability to express themselves emotionally.
Females typically are the opposite, so the scale balances.
You see gender specific roles all the time in nature. Lionesses hunt and provide food, while the Males protect the family. With Gorillas the Male stays vigilant, always on guard duty protecting the family while the females and children all eat, sleep, play and live their lives. Female Elephants lead their packs. They decide where to go and what to do and when and the rest of the family follows their lead.
Why did humans decide that it's best to go against their nature?
I think what was meant was for them to not try to literally be like each other gender, but perhaps the a little positive values of both sides more. Women are conditioned or taught to be more passive and sometimes assertivness is frowned upon towards women. Women who can be assertive can be seen as "bitches", whereas, guys can be more of a pass. Girls can be taught more to be compassionate, and nurturing, but less of assertivness or "masculine" qualities. And then boys are brought up to be always tough, and assertive and strong, which is good. But often it's one dimensional, which can be a burden. Since girls aren't viewed or expected to be tough, girls can express being sad or hurt and all these things. It can put young boys in an emotional straight jacket. And to bottle up things. So like perhaps it's meant more to allow both girls and guys to be more balanced on both qualities and not actually trying to have them be literally like each other.
Perhaps if boys were raised more to have more nurturing and emotional aspect too, there would probably be less heart broken girls too. Parents try to raise boys right, but like how girls are sexualized, and the difference how both are raised, I think gives boys a pass. Boys will be boys to use their sexuality to get a pass on competing with each other with hook ups and using girls or being players. Girls hook up too, but I've heard many do it to keep up but really prefer relationships. But because most of the guys they come across, want sex, some feel it's the only way to go otherwise not having sex for a long time. If more dudes had some female qualities like that, there could be less tryingt to have knotches on their bed post and perhaps more men in touch with their emotional, yes guys have feelings and less toward just their dick. I think if parents and society made guys more accountable for wanting to be manwhores, women would probably haves of this problem as perhaps more
No, we should raise our children to become decent human beings. I’m tired of this gender neutrality bs. Im not going to yellow everything to be “considerate” I like pink for my girls and buy them barbies and blue for my boys and buy them baseballs. However, I’m ok if my son wants to wear a pink and my daughter wants to play hockey but I’m not going to purposely push on each child what I think they should like or dislike. I’m going to Raise them as their gender they are visually physically born with until they voice their own likes and dislikes. Once they hit puberty let them figure their own sexuality out if the boys want to wear heels and girls want to chance their heads. I’m going to try my best not to confuse my kids.
The world is not gender neutral. Biology is not gender neutral. One man couples with one woman and they produce children. Their boy children will couple with other girls and their girl children will couple with other boys. It is two distinct genders that keep our species alive. Only a small minority will not follow that pattern.
Raising boys to act like girls, and girls to act like boys, is not doing great favors for anyone.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Eh. They’re kids it’s pretty easy to raise them all the same way. My family’s been doing it for years. If I were to sit down and pinpoint when kids in my family start to pick up a real gender identity it’s usually when they go to school and start interacting with other kids. I played with legos and so did my female cousins. I played with action figures just like my female cousins played with dolls. And yes my action figures mostly went on adventures but I still had female action figures and they had relationships just like girls had with their dolls. I’m really convinced that the gender divide really only exist in families that force it. If you let your kid drift to whatever they’re interested in there’s really no harm done. My entire life I think the phrase “that’s for girls” was spoken to me by an adult maybe a handful of times. I watched shows with female protagonist without any hesitation and so did my friends. My girl cousins played contact sports with my guy cousins if they wanted. There really wasn’t any gender discussion. It was very clear that kids were just kids and would be kids. So yeah I think kids should be raised gender neutral but I really don’t think you need to force it. A girl who wants a toy truck will want a toy truck just let her have it. There’s no need to MAKE your little boy wear a dress for the sake of gender neutrality. People keep pushing this narrative that girls don’t do STEM because the toys are geared towards boys but toys aren’t just created and shipped out. They’re tested on children and usually reflect what kids want. When do we step back and admit that maybe just maybe gender specific behavior isn’t 100% socially constructed. Maybe just maybe some of it is the result of biology even if that biological driver is just social cohesion. I’ve taught engineering to little girls some like it some just are not interested in it. And there’s noting gender specific about the educational tools we offer. It’s just stuff. There’s no color signaling. No tailoring towards interest. There’s just nothing gendered about building a clock or watching insects. But there’s still a gender divide and maybe that’s not societies fault. We know we feel emotions differently why is it such a stretch to believe that maybe our interests are also influenced by our Internal hormonal environment. People only make a big deal out of gender neutrality in childhood because in adulthood the most high paying job fields are occupied by men and it’s a scapegoat.
No, we shouldn't. But I think you should raise children the same. Meaning don't tell them that certain things are only for girls or boys.
If your daughter likes monster trucks, that's up to her. If your son likes Disney princess movies, let him watch what he wants.
I'm not saying if you buy your daughter a tutu, you should put your son in one too (unless he wants to, because children don't think like adults do, it isn't a gender or sexuality thing until you make it one, that's taught, it's just fabric to them, if your child wants to dress up and play pretend, it may simply be just fun for a child, don't shame them for that) but don't dictate so much what your children take interest in.
If you wanna sign your kids up for something, let them pick. Rather than putting your daughter in ballet by default and your son in football. Don't tell them, ballet is for girls. Football is for boys.
I think that can cause things like masculinity issues, and being afraid of looking even remotely feminine for a half of a second. Or being afraid of not being the epitome of feminity every second of the day.
Stop limiting your kids and pushing things on them, it's weird.
You may want to raise your daughter more like a son. In fact there was a song from a Broadway show, "Why can't a woman be more like a man?" It generally meant that women were too sensitive and didn't enjoy the things men like to do. But for gosh sakes don't raise your daughter to be like a man. Half of them are already there. What used to be a normal compliment is taken as "sexist." If you hold the door for a girl, some of the more radical ones take it as an insult. We're in the Deep South and tried to strike a balance. My wife saw that our one daughter took ballet and social dance growing up, and I bought her a 22 shot rifle when she was 10 and took her out to the range Saturday afternoons. We sent her to a fancy, private girls' college in Virginia, from which she graduated Valedictorian, Summa Cum Laude, Phi Beta Kappa. After she blew through medical school and residency she served as a Major in the Army in 2004 in Iraq, and yet is as feminine as can be. But don't raise your sons to be feminine. There's enough of those snowflakes around already. They have "cry rooms" at some left wing colleges now. Where I went to college, you had to take ROTC for at least two years, the next two for a commission. Then we all took a class trip to Vietnam.
Secondly, I believe children should be raised more gender neutrally. Don't shame your sons for playing with dolls, doing so helps them develop parenting skills. Don't teach them to repress their emotions, that'll lead to obvious emotional issues. Teach your daughters to use/maintain cars and other things, for obvious reasons.
These are examples of life/learning skills that benefit everyone, the only reason people think they're gender-specific seems to be because everyone's too sensitive about males v females to realize that they're... Multi-purpose/gender, for lack of better words.
No. I think we should teach our children to be open minded and accepting, thinking of others and themselves. Raising one as another doesn't solve any gender issues, it seems to me like the best option is to raise them with both daughters and sons on your mind. Gender neutrality isn't the problem. The problem has to do with stereotypes and stigmas. In order to provide insight, we should inform people about our views and discuss the topic in depth, not shove it in their faces and make them deal with it.
To raise our sons like girls and our daughters like boys is not gender neutral, is swapping roles.
Gender neutral would be to teach both my son and my daughter how to cook, to sew a button, to use a wrench, to fix a broken wire. Teaching both to be curious, ambicious, empathy and how to express themselves. I don't want empathetic girls and strong boys, neither strong girls and empathetic boys. I want both boys and girls to develop their strength and empathy. I want people to be able to take care of themselves and to be the most complete human beings.
... that's not what that quote means at all. Gloria Steinem isn't advocating forcing the kids into the opposite gender roles; she's saying we shouldn't limit our sons' choices.
Because as things are now, girls have more choices. Parents tell their daughters they can be anything they want to be... an astronaut and a mother, a tomboy and a girly-girl... but the sons don't get the same privilege. A girl can display a lot of traditionally "masculine" interests and traits, and get praised for it... but a boy displaying a lot of traditionally "feminine" interests and traits is more likely to get discouraged or mocked for it.
The idea is to raise children to be who they're most comfortable being, regardless of gender roles... and if that means that the odd boy likes to play with dolls or has pink as his favourite colour, he should be allowed to.
That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Men and women are different and no amount of "social conditioning" will alter that, the only thing your going to do is at best ruin their lives, at worse ruin them so badly they ruin other peoples lives. We are different, this has been proven so many times the fact that ANY ONE could suggest otherwise is just mind boggling, from studies on infant behaviors to other primates to every day interactions we know beyond a doubt that men and women are different and they need different things, we are not interchangeable. Gloria Steinem is also insanely sexist so not a good person to quote (but then again, all feminist by their nature are sexist).
I do think on certain issues, boys and girls have to be treated the same but I’d be foolish to say that boys and girls respond exactly the same to all parenting techniques and all situations. There are specific things unique to raising girls that aren’t present when talking about raising boys, and vice versa. Biologically speaking, boys and girls are different, which can account for a lot of the differences in interest, physicality, psychology, and how one parents raise each one. I believe a more tailored approach to each girl and boy, understanding the psychology and differences between the two genders, is the way to go.
I’m gonna raise my children (if I decide to have any) the way I know how to.
If I raise my son like a man then one day he says he identifies as a girl then that’s his choice and I’ll support his decision and still love him because he’s still my child at the end of the day and do whatever I can to help him in life because that’s my job as a parent till the day I die.
Same thing for my daughter.
I support that people are welcome to be whoever they believe they are born to be but I’m not gonna try to do anything differently because then I wouldn’t be myself, more of a template than an individual.
People seem to misunderstand the difference between genders and interests these days. There are boys who feel like boys but like playing with barbies. His interests don't make him a girl. There are girls who like being girls but like watching action movies and playing with cars once again her interests do not define her gender. Kids should be raised the same way as they always have the one thing that you should not do in order to be "gender neutral" is not to say about anything like "don't do that, that's for boys/girls"
If you try to raise your boy like he would be a girl will only make him grow up in confusion about his own gender.
Also if a kid grows up with a matching gender and sex they will have much much less difficulties in life and finding their place in the world.
Well if I m guessing right ya mean raising girls and boys with same moral, sensitive and caring to people around them, there's nothing wrong raising. A girl being more strong hearted, standing up for herself, and people around them similarly raising a boy to be respectful to girls, having honour, dignity and conscience is absolutely fine by me. If what I assumed you say I truly agree with what you said. Eventually we are all humans with just a gender differences and making a small change in raising your kid will be bringing a change to the world which may be a little but still will affect and inspire people who are connected to their lives.
Why would anybody do such a thing on their children? It’ll only confuse and ostracize them from their peers.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
This is a completely terrible idea. I just don't understand why people are so hellbent on destroying gender norms. What evidence is there that shows society would be better off with these changes?
The greatest civilizations in the world were founded by the Patriarchy and traditional gender roles. Have you ever heard the phrase, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it?". Certainly there were some broken aspects of the Patriarchy that needed fixing, like getting equality for women. But how are traditional gender roles broken? How is this weird alternative better?
Men face devestating emotional issues that results in men being 4 times more likely to commit suicide, far more likely to become addicted to drugs and alcohol, far less likely to seek help for problems, far more likely to try and sacrifice their happiness for others, etc. Then you add in the fact that women getting equality has already fucked the system, men have few abuse shelters despite being near 50% of domestic abuse victims, men are less likely to get mental help, far more likely to lose custody of children in court, and far more likely to face punishment (and harder, longer punishments) for his crimes than a woman would face.
@devilman666 But how do you know that raising men like girls will result in fixing those problems that you listed? What evidence are you basing that on?
@Opinion owner dont get me wrong, I'm not saying to raise them like girls in all ways, but I feel like allowing for men to express emotions more can only help our society. I think the idea of raising boys like girls is over simplified but taking some aspects of how we raise girls and applying them to boys seems to me like it will help some of the issues men face. I don't have evidence for this view.
I’m going to raise my children to be helicopters that exclusively mate with sexually adolescent hedgehogs. They will live off a diet of frozen tofu and baby polar bear and only wear clothes made from the skin of direct relatives of Viking royalty.
I want to make sure my children are as “unique” as possible.
Raise them to be reasonable credible compassionate respectful courageous fair minded people... Yup , I agree it’s a complete trap saying test them as some or as daughter bc then people end up half sorrows whichever way they get raised
The problem is children are raised too narrow not too broadly
Kids need a wide range of skill and insight not lops side strong or intelligent or graceful or courageous.
To ignore the fact that men and women are different is stupid. You are what you are, you can not change that. If you want your son to grow up strong and a true gentleman, then raise him as one.
in my opinion yes. Emotional suppression of men is shit and hurts boths genders, the whole "man up, dont cry, dont be a woman, etc.". No wonder men are 4 times more likely to commit suicide and are much more likely to become alcohol/drug abusers. I can't see emotional suppression like this as healthy, I even think it creates a lot of the mental illnesses men experience today.
Since the rise of feminism men have increasingly been encouraged to act more like girls - to be more sensitive, to be open with their emotions, "it's okay to cry". Our society today isn't traditional at all - traditional gender roles are discouraged, not encouraged. The more it has been discouraged, the more men have been encouraged to be sensitive and effeminate, the more men have committed suicide. They're no longer taught to be stoic.
I think that men's issues are caused more by other things, particularly the elevation of women to the detriment of men. Men losing their place in society as masculinity and the traditional male role is increasingly devalued - and as a result so are men. I think that they commit suicide because they feel like they have no value in today's world, not because they want to cry.
I agree that men losing value is part of the problem, but the fact that they resort to killing themselves instead of seeking psychiatric help or trying to find value is very telling of their mental health. I think the bigger issue is that men are trying to be traditional and women are using the traditionalism to their advantage while not being traditional themselves. In the current dating sphere women can easily, and are encouraged by feminism to, take advantage of men. Men are simply told to deal with it and to man up, you can tell me that I am wrong but this is from my experience and the experiences of the people I've met. Being unable to cry isn't a strength, tell me, what do men gain from never crying?
Also, why do you think being sensitive/effeminate would lead men to suicide?
Here are the statistics for my country, my bad it's only 3x worse here, though I was also slightly wrong as the global percentage is much closer to even, it's just Europe and the north america nearing 4x more suicides in men: www150.statcan.gc.ca/.../11696-eng.htm
The traditional way is the natural way. It would take me way too long to explain this but I very easily could, with so many examples and statistics to back up my points. Perhaps I'll write a take about that at some point. Our feminist society makes both men and women miserable - roughly 50% of women are on some form of anti-depressant. They might be less likely to kill themselves, but they're more miserable despite being able to be open about their emotions. It's this loss of the traditional role that makes men so miserable too. So I don't think the solution is to go against traditional gender roles when it's exactly that which causes such a massive amount of depression and dysfunctional relationships, instead we should fight against feminism and the ridiculous obsession with gender equality because that's the problem. You can't solve a problem by encouraging more of the same.
As for men being encouraged to be more sensitive and the link with suicide - look at how easily offended people are today? Particularly millenials? Everything is offensive to them, to the point where they feel the need to ban words, and they need "safe spaces" where people don't say things they don't like in case they get "triggered". They have such a huge emotional response to words. When I was younger I was taught "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". I was always small so people would try to bully me, but I had it drilled into me from a young age never to take any shit - literally "man up and deal with it". As a result bullying was never a problem for me. Yet now kids can't handle a bit of name-calling. When you encourage someone to be overly sensitive they become weak, especially if you encourage a victimhood mentality on top of that, and I'd say this is especially true of boys/men. It makes them soft, unable to handle life.
There's no way to really find statistics to support what I'm saying. The things I'm talking about are pretty easy to spot and understand however. All you have to look at is what is the popular opinion. Devilman's opinion is the popular opinion today - men need to be more emotional, traditional gender roles are bad, talk of "toxic masculinity". These ideas would have been laughed at decades ago, when people were more traditional. Now they're not.
So your statistics are actually just opinions that haven't yet been disproved? And yes, those are traditional views. Which is the main giveaway that they're outdated ones. Lastly, please tell me that your use of the word devilman isn't religious
@englisc "the traditional way is the natural way" please back up this statement. You easily could but you wont? Sure.
As a potential counter argument, perhaps women just more aware of depression or less likely to hide it in todays society? Rather than being more depressed than they were before.
"It's this loss of the traditional role that makes men so miserable too." Explain? Is the traditional role in our dna or something? You're saying traditional is the only way to find happiness?
So we should fight against feminism? The only way to do that at this point would be to literally oppress women, they want freedom and independance.
So being offended leads to suicide? I definitely need an explanation here, seriously, I want to hear how this goes, maybe a couple mentally ill people will kill themselves over being "triggered" but the majority of people will not take their own life like that.
"When you encourage someone to be overly sensitive they become weak" evidence? You still haven't told me what men gain from not crying. I grew up being told not to cry and I hadn't shed a tear in years. Yet I constantly felt weak. Then a couple monthes ago I saw a close friend and one of the toughtest guys I know cry as he told me about a friend of his who comitted suicide. I felt guilty that I couldn't shed a tear, I felt emotionally damaged, like it should have affected me emotionally, but I barely felt sad.
Feelings and emotions are not a weakness, They are human, to damage your ability to feel emotions is to damage yourself as a person. Being willing to cry is not a weakness, if anything, I think it shows confidence. Sobbing is a little overboard, but being willing to open up that part of yourself and your feelings to others takes pure confidence. Hiding your feelings out of fear and shame is the opposite of masculinity, it's cowardice and it's rather pathetic.
"The things I'm talking about are easy to spot and understand" oh don't even pull that. That's just a load of crap so you don't have to back up your statements.
The reason I haven't is that it would requirea lot more than 2000 characters. Like I said I might write a take on it if I find the time.
I don't think that women have somehow become more aware of depression. Depression isn't the normal state for human beings. In fact many studies have been done on modern day hunter gatherer tribes. They live the way our ancestors lived. While not perfect of course since they suffer many infant deaths and things like that, when asked they have no idea what depression is. To them it doesn't even exist, so many call depression a "disease of civilisation". That 50% of women are so depressed that they require medication to feel normal should signal that there's something wrong with the culture. Why would it be normal that so many of them would need medication to live their day to day lives? That would make no sense.
As for crying, one of the natural side effects of testosterone is less empathy. Men are simply less likely to cry.
So it's not a sign of being emotionally stunted. we just aren't like women. However, studies have also showed that the average man of today has 20% less testosterone than men of 20 years ago. This means that many more men suffer low testosterone, which leads to depression, anxiety, and these are contributing factors towards suicide. When they lack the hormone that makes them masculine, they become more depressed. That's partly why I say that encouraging men to be more like women is a bad idea.
As for fighting feminism, that doesn't mean oppressing women. As our culture has become more feminist, more and more women have become depressed. Stay at home Mothers tend to report higher levels of happiness, as do women who work part time. Couples on which the man works and the woman stays home are also the least likely to divorce. I don't mean that women shouldn't be allowed to do what they want, but today traditional gender roles are discouraged.
It's hard to fully respond in so few characters as I mentioned. That's why I haven't cited all of the studies, of which there a many to back up most of my claims.
I think that a lot of the other things I mentioned are just common sense. Who is more likely to get upset, an overly sensitive person or a less emotional person? Why would you need a study for that?
Also the point I was making about traditional gender roles and standards. The girl said that they're outdated - proving my point that this is the popular opinion today. Again, why would you need a study for that when its so easy to see that our culture has "progressed" to become less traditional over time? And as it has done that, the gap between male and female suicide rates has risen. Then how is it that traditional expectations of masculinity are to blame? Wouldn't the progress of having less traditional expectations of men lead to less suicide if that were truly the cause?
If it takes so much to explain then how is it so easy to explain and understand?
So you immediately jump to feminism and the fact that they aren't stay at home wives as the reason for their depression? You haven't given evidence for causation.
I'd like to see the study showing that being more emotional lowers your testosterone levels. I looked up a study that agreed with you more or less but the fact that men have less testosterone now still needs to be linked with encouraging emotions in men.
And being upset leads to suicide? I don't think you understand how suicide works. Seriously, I want a logical argument to back up your point, how does being more sensitive/getting triggered make you kill yourself? If you had a mental illness sure, but then thats the fault of the illness isn't it?
Not everyone sees everything the same way, which is why being able to give context and reasoning is important rather than just stating things. Correlation is not causation, dont confuse the two here, I want evidence of causation. I could say that depression is up because of the fact that we have so much noise pollution, becauae as noise pollution rose, so did depression and suicide. That's your logic here.
I blame traditional expectations because they force a sense of pride upon men, and when men fail to meet that sense of pride they feel a great shame. Add on that traditionalism tells men to suck it up and deal with it themselves, be independant and not get help when they need it, and suddenly if a man hits a low point in life it devastates him. I've seen men lose jobs for a couple months and attempt suicide because their life is falling apart and they don't know what to do or who to talk to. If a man finds himself facing something he can't deal with, he might wallow in his inability instead of asking of assistance, which can lead to a cycle of depression that gets worse and worse.
"Wouldn't the progress of having less traditional expectations of men lead to less suicide if that were truly the case?" Perhaps. Suicide is a very complicated issue dealing with several topics of mental health. It's quite possible that other factors (like weaker family bonds) could lead to an increase in depression even with less expectations causing men to feel less burdened. So again, correlation is not causation, you can't just assume the root of the problem.
There are many studies that prove that higher levels of testosterone are linked with lower levels of empathy, which you could find with a very quick google search. Here's one of them:
The reason for this is simple - women are designed to nurture children. In order to do that they need to be empathetic. They naturally have less testosterone, which gives them a natural advantage in this area. However, Fathers do experience a temporary drop in testosterone after the child is born:
This happens in order for the Father to become more empathetic to the child - because testosterone inhibits this response.
Now, if this happens for too long, the Father is also likely to suffer with postpartum depression. That's because one of the side effects of low testosterone is depression. This again can be easily found with a quick google search, it's common knowledge.
There are many reasons that men today have low testosterone - diet, environmental toxins, the way they're raised, stress, lack of exercise etc. All of these things affect testosterone. The tiniest of things can affect this, things that you wouldn't think would make any difference.
So basically, acts of dominance increase testosterone, and this encourages dominance. This even includes a guy watching his favorite football team win or lose:
Now, we live in a culture that discourages dominance in men, and promotes equality of the sexes which I think is unnatural. This is a long one, but it explains how those marriages with more equal roles usually = less sex:
Because women prefer and are happier with more dominant men, in more traditional roles. When it comes to sexual attraction they look for signs of high testosterone since this indicates high reproductive fitness:
I could post study after study but like I said its hard to do so in so few characters. A lot of this is common sense and shouldn't even need studies to be proven. But from what you can see here, basically - testosterone: less empathy, more confidence, more competitive drive, more sexual success. Lack of testosterone: more depression, less confidence, less sexual success. Testosterone is affected by many things as mentioned, and we live in a culture that discourages most of the the things that would increase it. We live in a feminist, anti-male culture that does everything it can to emasculate men, and this question is a result of that. This makes men miserable. My contention is that more encouragement of men to become more like women is detrimental to them, not helpful.
Raise them like children. Nothing wrong with a boy liking trucks, but if he wants to play with dolls there is no harm in that. Encourage all children to be curious and adventurous but also teach them to be kind and empathetic. We should be taking the best of both and putting them together.
I think we should raise our kids as kids, not influenced by gender roles. If my son wants to play with barbies and my daughter wants to play with cars, I wouldn't stop them. That's the best age for a person, in that age they should learn manners and create their morals, besides that they should just be made happy.
Parents should raise their kids how they want. I’ll raise my kids normally and let them decide what they want or don’t want, give them a choice and not try mold them into something they’re not.
i don't know what it means to raise my son like a daughter... teach him he has a vagina?
i have two kids a girl and a boy. i don't treat them differently except where they are biolgoically different or where i see differences in them that dictate how i parent
I’m a trans woman and I say : let kids be kids. It doesn’t matter what the political world thinks about it. Some kids are trans and others aren’t. Support the kids who have a trans identity ( without medical intervention, let them dress according to the gender they identify with ) and let other kids dress according to their birth gender. I’m an adult, I can fight for my own rights, no need to draw kids into political themes.
No definitely not. I am very against this whole gender fluid movement and this would prove awful if boys were raised like girls and vise versa. We have enough deadbeats in this world. The simple fact that girls and boys are NOT the same, they need different kinds of raising or else you'll get more gay people and more gay people means a lower birth rate.
No, raise them like children, like human beings. They will turn out fine. The whole problem is that we try to raise our children like this or like that, or this other way, or THAT other other way. We are creating the problems by trying to make hard lines and distinction between people and children that just don't exist.
Hell no. That's ridiculous. Boys are born to be men and girls are born to be women. We each have our own gender roles because of our gender. And we should raise our kids the way they are meant to be. Don't force girls to act manly and boys to act girly. That's against the law of nature. That would be screwing up the way we function as people and a society.
Are you for real? That is absolutely ridiculous. Gender neutral is some made up bulshit some idiotic people came up with as a theory gender roles hold Society together men and women or equal as a matter of fact for a biological standpoint and is a survival of species standpoint women are far superior that being said we have rolls that it's come down through up history and as long is everyone is treated equally all is good
I would rather my future kids as not a boy or a girl, but rather let them decide as they get older what they like or dislike and who they are as a person. Sure, I might dress them as a baby, but once they are old enough I'll let them pick their own clothes, interests, etc and support them.
Everyone who thinks in terms of "what WE should do" should be executed. Freedom means I do what's right for myself and my family, and you do what's right for yourself and your family. The only exception is electing representatives who are meant to legislate and enforce laws to protect law abiding citizens from people and organizations who intend to kill us, hurt us or steal from us.
That idea is why the youth today keeps coming up with new gender tags. Raise your kids to be kids, shou them how to respect and treat their SO by being the example. Teach them how to do car maintenance, how to do basic home repair, let them decide what they want when they become older.
Worst idea ever! Boys will be boys, girls will be girls. So it's a good idea to raise children in a way that counters thier gender specific hormones? It's going to have adverse effects on the child's development... Men and Women are equals, doesn't mean they aren't different
No, that's sounds absolutely retarded. Boys and girls are different on emotional, psychological, mental, and not to mention physical levels. Do you need to teach boys how to put on their tampons? Or girls how to pee standing up? Even saying, "treat them equal" is dumb. Every child is different and needs different treatment, and the difference between boys and girls is just too apparent. They have different needs and interests.
I think you need to just fucking raise your children as children and stop hyper-focusing on issues of sex and gender. It isn’t like most kids understand it or care.
Absolutely not I'm raising my son to be a man and a gentleman and I will raise my daughter to be a woman and a lady. I don't believe in this gender neutral crap.
If I have kids I'ma raise my children old school. I'll teach my boys men things like mechanics, sports and manual labor to be responsible and take care of girls.
Girls will be taught to be proper ladies and to be nurturing and kind.
However I will always teach them that it's okay to be gay or bi. I would want my kids to be able to tell their dad anything and that I will love them regardless
Obviously, this Gloria Steinem advocates for the destruction of society.
People are sick of this human filth, I dare call miss Steinem, and starting to openly and shamelessly spout their common-sense opinions. We don't care about gender-bender bs, lbgt, or whatever.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
That just leads to confusion. Bring them up according to their SEX, not gender. Then let them decide what they want to be when they are old enough.
No, we should raise out sons like out sons, and out daughters like our daughters. That's why we decided to gender them in the first place - they need and want different things in life.
Boys are frequently not taught how to cook, keep house or care for children. For example. But these are all good skills for adults to have. Boys don't deserve to be robbed of that just because rednecks think it's queer.
Maybe with the rise of feminism and equality we should start encouraging boys to kick the shit out of girls too? We need to start toughening women up too, since they're as independant and as strong as men are, can't have any women being pussies these days.
No, feminism, gender-neutrality, the obsession with men and women being equal in absolutely everything - is retarded. Men aren't supposed to be passive, weak, and women aren't supposed to be as strong as men are - they aren't even physically capable of that.
@englisc it was satire. I don't think we should beat the shit out of either men or women for being emotional. I don't think men and women should be equal in every way, but I don't see why men should be forced into traditional roles if women aren't. My comment was intended to point out the hypocrisy of her comment which pushed an idea of forcing men to be strong when we live in a society where feminism says women can be whatever they want.
I do think feminism in it's current form is ridiculous and hypocritical, but I dont disagree with letting women be independant if that's what they want. I think there is an argument to be made on them being physically weaker than men, but they can handle work and they can protect themselves if they know how. I don't see the point in chivalry and protecting/not hitting women if women are wanting feminism, then we just have men hypocritically forced into traditional roles and women not.
@nacho it’s not you see girls and doing the same jobs guys do n you never seen a female beat up a guy? Cause I have, and yes the dude was swinging back. First off all of y’all aren’t strong anyway.
No, you aren't. Maybe up against a weak man, sure. Weak men exist. The majority of men are still stronger than the majority of women. This is common sense, but there are also multiple scientific studies that prove this to be true. Just because you saw one exception to that rule doesn't disprove it at all. You're deluded if you think that's true.
Yes the majority is stronger did I say it wasn’t? See how you said majority? Either way like I said some women are stronger then some men. So don’t say that’s not capable of happening.
The reason they used grip strength is because this is a very good indicator of overall strength. As you'll see from the results, even top female athletes in sports that require a high amount of grip strength scored lower than the average, untrained man, the 25th percentile of the male scores. So even the strongest women are not as strong as the average man. Never mind the average woman - 90% of women scored lower than 95% of average men.
And we've spoken in facts as well, the bullet and knife mention has nothing to do with what we are talking about, stop trying to change the subject. Like englisc said "90% of women scored lower than 95% of average men"
@eng your talking about something else tho like I said some women are capable of being just as strong and in fact stronger than some men you showing statistics that men are usually stronger isn’t helping u out.
I'm not talking about anything else. You claimed that women are capable of being just as strong as men. I cited a scientific study which showed that even the strongest women, elite athletes who train daily to become as strong as possible, were not as strong as the average, untrained man. That's because they're biologically limited. Incapable. You mentioned one anecdote where you saw a girl beat up a guy, which might be true but we don't know this, and somehow in your mind that disproves studies in which hundreds of people were tested and had their results recorded. Your argument is based on opinion, not fact. Facts are measurable. And this also has nothing to do with ego, knives or guns.
@englisc well you have to know that’s bs. I HAVE SEEN WOMEN LIFT MORE THAN OTHER GUYS. I HAVE SEEN GUYS TAKE L’s from WOMEN IN PERSON. That “scientific study” was bs sorry to tell you. If these guys were so much stronger than a woman who were untrained why couldn’t these guys beat them, these women worked out. Why couldn’t these men lift more than the trained women? I would think that it would be common sense that regardless of gender if you’re trained in something you’re going to better at it.
You're arguing against scientific findings with opinions based on anecdotes. You'd also assume that women who lifted a lot would have stronger grips than untrained men, but that study proved this to be false. But since you're arguing with science, let me ask you this - who do you think would win in a fight between:
1) a female boxer and kickboxer, undefeated champion with 34 fights, considered to be the best female fighter of all time?
2) an unknown man of the same size, a mediocre fighter, who has never been a champion because he's not that good?
I’m 99.9 percent positive a woman who lifts a lot will have a stronger grip than a guy who doesn’t. Also 1 would win, fighting isn’t all about strength anyway.
So what you're saying is that science is wrong, because you have common sense. This common sense that you have which must be right also tells you that obviously the woman will win, let's see how accurate you are:
^Im saying that that scientific study was bs. Pretty sure it never happened. I’ve seen these things I’m not going to deny what I saw with my own two eyes.
The science is wrong and never happened, that fight that went the opposite way to which you said it would is wrong and probably never happened, because your anecdotal evidence and feelings trump all of that. Your opinions are facts.
Ok just watched it. 1. He is a trained fighter and you said he’s not that good, he obviously has her in the defense most of the match so I’m pretty sure he’s good if she’s apparently undefeated but ok. 2. She’s undefeated where? Cause Ik a couple of ufc/street fighters that would beat her as she doesn’t look good. Tbh he looked like he was the better fighter but I don't know her if she’s so undefeated how come no one barely talks about her? It was all about Ronda Rousey. What you seem to not understand which I don’t get how is that ALL GUYS CAN NOT BEAT ALL WOMEN. ALSO ALL MEN aren't STRONGER THAN ALL WOMEN. There I put it in caps for you. Can you do me a favor and look up on Youtube girls beating guys up? Cause there’s a lot of those vids 😁
People don't talk about her now because she retired years ago, and also most people don't pay as much attention to female fighters anyway. She's undefeated in boxing and muay thai, against women that is. That guy was never a champion. Had that been a male champion against him it would have been a one-sided slaughter, he won because he had more strength and more of an ability to take a punch.
I know not all, but most. There are biological difference between men and women. The strongest women aren't as strong as average men, that's just a fact. They can beat up weak men. To say that women are just as capable is false. That's why they lowered the physical standards of women to allow more of them into the military, the police, and the fire service, because they couldn't compete with men on equal terms.
As for the video, the guy wasn't hitting her back. It would have been so easy for him to roll forwards and dump her right on her head, but he didn't. The reason for that is that as men we know that we're stronger than women, we're raised not to hit women. I've trained martial arts myself, and when I went into muay thai some girls trained there. They were very good, roughly the same size as me, and more experienced than me at the time since I'd only done boxing before that, but I had to hold back myself.
Absolutely not. I think that men and women are naturally designed for different things and I think our differences should be celebrated, not discouraged.
I think that trying to compare women with men is like trying to compare a fire fighter with a cop. A fire fighters job is obviously to fight fires, and a cops job is obviously to fight crime. If you compare them based on their ability to fight fires, the firefighter is "superior". If you compare them based on their ability to catch criminals, the cop is "superior". But that makes no sense when they aren't even meant to do the same thing. A good cop is superior to a bad firefighter and vice versa. The same goes for men and women.
We should raise our children, regardless of gender, to do whatever the fuck they want as long as they don't physically harm anyone else. We should raise them to live and let live.
Just remove the expectations around it and theyll sort themselves out. Generally they emulate their parents for the first while but gender identity doesn't become a big deal until puberty.
Actually just swapping the traditional teaching from one gender to the other wouldn't be gender neutral at all. It would just be reversing the traditional roles.
And what exactly is the benefit of gender neutral over gender roles? I mean... im all for it if the boy wants to help clean the kitchen and the girl wants to go out and shovel snow... but not to be forced upon.
Sure why not? Anything that is completely screwed up sells, so yes.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
If that kid wants to, then yes. Otherwise, no. I’m a tomboy, so I’d be okay with boys being more girly and girls being tomboyish. The important things are that the child is healthy (both mentally and psychically), a good person and happy.
Both genders have equal value that should always be taught. But it's wrong to raise your daughters like sons? Now Gloria wants to double down on that stupidity?
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