Do you enjoy being single?

Question

I find it’s a big challenge these days to find a man who’s able to accept how a woman looks. On fanficton apps, the men in those R rated novels are immediately turned on when the female reader gets naked in front of them. They didn’t care if she has scars on her body, whether she has a hot body, or if she is shave down there or not, they will want to fuck the female reader which is something most men in real life are not like that. I had a very toxic relationship with my ex who didn’t make me feel loved, the break up was the best, he also looks down on women. I think it’s impossible to find a man who doesn’t seem to mind how I look naked and is turned on by my naked body, and finding a man who loves me for me is hard. For now I will just enjoy being loved by reading more of those novels which is something I can never get in real life.

Birdlegs · Accepted Answer

Being single isn’t too bad to me. But those novels are completely fantasy. They’ll give you an unrealistic view of men. From your other comments it sounds like you’re in shape and everything so don’t worry about IF someone will accept your body it’s just a matter of when

nik4play · Accepted Answer

I love being single. I think to be happy with yourself in your own skin, is number one.. you don't need to change, you are you. If you can be happy in that fact, then you can show your confidence, that becomes another attractive factor in your armoury.

Cathy7734 · Answer

"I think it’s impossible to find a man who doesn’t seem to mind how I look naked and is turned on by my naked body, and finding a man who loves me for me is hard."

You are right. Tony Robbins says that we all have stories that we tell ourselves and they are self-fulfilled prophecies.

For example, if a man says, "All the women I'm interested in just use me for my money." And he has concrete proof of this, as well as his friends. Guess what will happen with the next woman he is interested in? She will use him for his money. It just has to be that way.

In your case, you have a concrete story you are telling yourself and it's a self-fulfilled prophecy. Guess what will happen with the next man you are interested in? He will mind how you look naked and will be turned-off by your naked body. It just has to be that way.

In any case, right now I enjoy being single because I have a lot going on in my life and currently don't have time to pursue a relationship. I just want to graduate from college.

SkyCastle90 · Answer

I'm glad you're out of that relationship; but always remember that you're strong, resilient, and capable; you're not a victim because you no longer suffer at his hand, you're a survivor.

I understand you're hurting and going through the motions, but don't begin to hate men or develop high expectations of the type of man you're searching for based off fictional stories and fantasies. The type of men you're reading about do not exist, perfection is a fantasy in itself. Instead just enjoy the stories as what they are, stories. If you are experiencing bouts of anger toward men and having trouble moving pass what your ex did to you, there's no shame in asking for help.

Rei02 · Answer

It is joyful when you break the program of "you need a love partner" which has been with us since the beginning of humanity. Nowadays, we have become more individuals, we have more chances to be independent both economically and emotionally, but also our expectations and selfishness have become higher, and some things like the increase of inflation rates, not been kicked out from home earlier, being pampered by the family, the society and the technology, and the increase of people with the Peter Pan syndrome, Puer Aeternus and the wanting of only the benefits but not the responsibilities for being adults, have collaborated with not having a serious relationship.

That's why separations and divorces have increased, and also the option of being a single parent has become more acceptable. Society has given many options and reasons to remain single and how to make a living and survive "alone".

Paulalove98 · Answer

I enjoy it at times as I’ve been single for a year but I do miss having a romantic partner and someone to lean on, a kind hearted guy telling me how beautiful I look, or that he cares about me and needs me but I realized the best relationships and finding the right person takes time and it won’t happen over night. Nowadays it’s much harder with the hookup culture but if you appreciate yourself, eventually that wonderful guy will come around too. I definitely haven’t lost hope in finding love even though I’ve been through some heartaches. You shouldn’t give up either.

Lionman95 · Answer

Yes and no I think it has pros and cons.
For me at the moment a pro that I can heal myself from porn and its overuse on my own and there is no one I can hurt while doing so.
On the other hand all my buddies and colleagues are either in a relationship or married and I´m the only one single which makes life hard.
The older I get still being single the more people are suspicious that I´m a pervert or some weirdo that´s incapable of social skills.
It´s not easy but it´s maybe better for the time being.

Bubbles45 · Answer

Being single has it's pros and cons, obviously I would like to date somebody sometime in my life but it just hasn't happened yet.

Eventually when I meet someone that's compatible with me then hopefully things will get better, but as of right now I've just been kind of cruising through life hoping for the best.

I'm not necessarily sad or depressed it's just something that will happen eventually I know it, things take time there's no need to rush into a relationship..

So no I don't necessarily enjoy being single either, but for the time being it's tolerable. 😅

CubsterShura · Answer

I was single for a while since my last relationship and I was really enjoying it. I was going through some massive changes in my life not only externally like getting into college and moving abroad but also internally such as reflecting on my childhood traumas, shadow work and improving my mindset. I was cutting off toxic people from my life, only keeping the good ones close while still allowing myself to meet new people, especially guys just to get to know what kind of men are out there and slowly get into casual dating. I had some really positive experienced out of that!

And then my relationship happened suddenly. I met this guy through a mutual friend and within a few days we started feeling attracted to each other. Up until then my single life was going great to the point I jokingly tell him that I had plans to improve myself in all these ways then he came to ruin them 😂 he didn't ruin anything.

mstbooblover · Answer

Actually, yes, I do enjoy it. At 16 years, leaving so-called home had been a real deliverance, and thus I learned how one is better of single than living with the wrong people. After my military service I had a job and a little appartement. When I was 25 I met my wife, who died after 38 years of marriage. Now, since her death in 2017, after a difficult mourning period, I'm feeling good.

Although I miss the intimacy of a woman, living single is rather good for me. I can go wherever, do and eat whatever I like, and whenever I want, which does not prevent me from taking good care of my two cats and the plants. Still, I would appreciate having a regular intimate female friend...

Now, I'm aware that living single is not recommended for everyone, but for me it works fine.

Sparks32 · Answer

I find it very relaxing being single, I can do nearly anything I want and nobody judges me. Do more having to do only what my girl friends want. No more fights or nagging. I always wanted a girl that was sweet cute and kind but just like the Easter Bunny Unicorns don't Exist.
I don't hate Women though and as for the asker I've never heard of any straight man that was turned off by a naked Woman's body. Your ex sounds a bit unique really. I do miss sex and companionship I bit. Women bits shaved and unshaved I was always just happy to be there.

ANDYB88 · Answer

The gender split on this is pretty clear - I think the people who are single who know they have options etc seem to love the freedom that being single brings. The ones who are single with limited options seem like it’s more of a cage thrust on them. For me, I don’t enjoy being single. In my 20s and early 30s I was mostly coupled up so I got kind of used to it - that became my norm. Now that I’m single again I’m finding it really very hard. I miss a lot of things about being in a relationship, especially having someone to share experiences with and having a partner in crime around if that makes sense. Also, for men (most men anyway), the lack of sex can be almost unbearable. I’ve had entire weeks lately where I’ve wanted to scream because I’ve been so horny-it even affects your sleep. I know I can cope being single but I don’t enjoy it, especially now I’m a bit older and finding it really genuinely hard to meet single women who are interested.. anyway that’s my take on it

HighValue · Answer

I enjoy being single for these reasons:
1. I can do whatever I want when I want.
2. Nobody is angry with me for not drinking alcohol.
3. Nobody is complaining that I don't get them enough jewelry.
4. Nobody is complaining that I don't provide her with a car.
5. Nobody is lying to me.
6. Nobody is asking me to do extra stuff when I get off work even though she didn't work and just sat on her butt all day.
7. Nobody is accusing me of cheating when I want to stay home by myself instead of going on a trip to go gamble.
8. It is more peaceful and I can relax mentally when single.
9. I am not expected to put in effort for special occasions when the other person thinks she doesn't need to do anything in return.
10. I am able to save a lot more money and pay off my debts much more easily on my own.

WalterBlack · Answer

I would not say that I "enjoy" being single. It is a situation that is appropriate for me at this time and I generally accept it. But I do get very lonely sometimes. Being single is 1000 times better than being in an unhealthy relationship. If I ever find my soulmate, I would be happy to be in a relationship. But I will never again settle for someone who is less than 100% compatible with me.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

As for me I’m single & accepting applications & when it comes to love I think I have a better chance of getting hit by lightning on a submarine but than again lightning can strike when I least expect it. On the other hand I’m single because I simply choose to be as of the moment & I’m ok with that.

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

I don't appreciate pressure to be honest.
Of any kind.

I have seen my friends having the untold pressure of the girlfriend. So I would just stay away from it. Also it is not like if I say that I am available, anyone is going to come. Not that good, and beautiful. So I am good, naturally...🤣

Anonymous · Answer

Well those novels are over romanced in general, and be hard pressed to find that in real life (that's why they're in novels) lol, but women are the same, may just not be as open or vocal about it. Either that or you're just extremely unlucky with guys and have manage to find all the wrong ones. And there's a difference between acceptance, and just plain turn offs. Like I say, if a woman is turned off by an overweight man, she's not likely going to "accept" him either. The sex life will suffer at the very least.

Anonymous · Answer

My guy friends are lazy now or they are married or with someone. I’ve gone to the movies alone, sporting events alone, shopped alone, even to restaurants alone for yearsss. Single life isn’t that great. Yeah you have freedom what you want but a healthy, open minded relationship is what counts. Obviously if you’re with someone you despise/hate why would anyone want to date or be in a relationship?

But if you’re with someone special it changes the perspective on so many things. If people want to give their negative input on relationships that it sucks because of their past experiences that is not giving a valid argument.

Reaper1985 · Answer

currently I enjoy being single because many people in modern day have their perceptions and/or requirements for being in a relationship are set to high.

SolitarySolace · Answer

So I enjoy being single? Absolutely. It’s better than being in a miserable relationship, putting your heart out there to be stepped on either while trying to find someone or while you’re with someone. If you’re single you don’t have to worry about your heart getting hurt. It feels like wanting to throw up your own heart. Why would anyone want to risk feeling like that?

Anonymous · Answer

I haven't been single in five years. However, based on my memory of being single I can say there were positives to it, but being in a relationship with a great man is way, way better. However, I've also been with a pretty crappy guy, and that was way worse than being single.

chulo1992 · Answer

I LOVE being single!!! I love that I can go and come as I please and don't have to answer to anyone. I can watch whatever I want to watch on tv, a movie, a reality show, a horror flick or whatever else... with no hesitation. I love my quiet time and really hate talking in the mornings. So being single, I get to enjoy all of that!!!

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