What do you think of my poetry?

[jennifer_bloom]

The swallows burn in the incandescence

what oozes from this lacquerer river

flows into the crevices of my mind

What deafens the heart of the silent signature

Is the amorous glean reining rain

The swallows die in piercing drought

The broken shells of faith and truth

barren on the ground

for the swallows have died

and the deaf ear as won

[Phoenix98]

I like it, it’s not bad at all.

if you want serious reviews on your work I suggest going to all poetry good free site great place to post your work and even get it in books or on the radio.

I’ve had several pieces put in books and one on the radio from there.

[Jamie05rhs]

Very interesting!

[Jamie05rhs]

Did you mean "has won"?

[jennifer_bloom]

Yes. Has won

[Jamie05rhs]

Cool :)

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO. :)

[Middleman]

Very good! I can 'see' you know how to write. Aside from the words that rhyme you've got strong visuals, sounds and even 'texture' such as the oozing and the 'lacquerer river' (which if I'm not mistaken, is the wax dripping). And how can I not forget when you mention 'the swallows have died' it also means the flame has been extinguished? Very nice!

[letuswaltzforthedead]

I think it's beautiful and you're very good at it.

[EricMills09456]

That's actually pretty cool.

[Avicenna]

Very nice, share some more of it!

[Zolly99999]

Not bad at all

Good job