I am haunted by my regrets. how to move on from past mistakes?

[Anonymous]

Hello. I think every one of us has regrets in life and certainly have made mistakes that we learn from and help us move forward. However i keep getting haunted by mine even though im trying to move past it.

I graduated high school at 18. Tried college right after, but i was immature and didn't take it seriously, so i kept failing and eventually dropped out. I also couldnt figure out what i wanted to do with my life, so i wanted to “wait”. For six years, i worked at restaurants and went out a lot. I’m 24 now and have only started to go back to school. Most of my friends have graduated college two or so years ago. I was in denial and kept doing nothing with my life. Met the love of my life a year ago when i was at my worst. I didn't think it would happen to me but he “pulled me out of darkness” and loved me despite all the things i lacked. He made me want to be better.

Anyway, i had just finished my first semester back in school and i did okay. I know what i want to do now, but i couldnt shake the feeling of regret. How i wasted my life for half a decade. I won't be graduating until im 27 or 28 years old. Recently i went to my friend’s graduation ceremony, i was sooo so happy for her, but then on my way to her university, i started crying so hard. I realized if i had gotten my shit together sooner i could also be graduating that day, or a year before that, and so on. I feel so ashamed when i talk to my old friends. I feel bad for my parents. I want to make them proud.

I randomly cry and hate on myself when i get reminded of what i have done. My parents are disappointed in me, my friends look down on me. My boyfriend is the only one who supports me and motivates me. I love him more for that. However, i need to stop drowning myself in my past mistakes but its so hard. Im trying to be better but i am filled with self hatred and anger. How can i move on?

[SueShe]

If you react that way for every mistake you make in life, then you will never achieve anything. Okay, you did make a major mistake but you also learned something from it since you live to regret this mistake. I sincerely hope you will not make this mistake again.

Now, you have your entire future ahead of you and you have the willpower and support of your boyfriend to make a difference to those that care for you. Show them that they can be proud of you and show all the others that despite having made a major mistake in life, you can still level up with them.

It takes courage to recognize that one has made a mistake in life but the impact of that mistake can be such that you can achieve what others have not yet achieved and that is self respect and self esteem to have achieved something despite all the stones that were placed on your path.

All you need is to believe in yourself and when your parents and friends realize that you have achieved something despite the stones in your path, then they will be as proud of you as you can be of yourself. Good luck and never look back. Your future lies ahead.

[patois]

It sounds like you need to find new friends if they look down on you. That out of the way, finish up your studies and pursue your current goals. I doubt your family thinks as negatively of you as you think. At the end of the day, you're still blood. They know you're working toward what you want in life so they will be proud of you when you reach your achievements. None the less, it's your life and you should be doing things for you not for them.