5 Lessons Learned By Wasting 4 Years on Mr. Wrong

[Anonymous]

Here are the things I learned from dating a guy that I knew deep down was not the right guy for me... yet I spent 4 years of my life trying to make it "work".

1. If it doesn't work, IT DOESN'T WORK!

Fights? Constant drama? If you've been down the same path more than a dozen times in the past two months, time to re-evaluate. If relationship talks end up being just talks, and there is no action, it is time to walk away.

2. Stop "hoping" he will change.

If you're waiting around for the same guy that you fell in love with when you first met- most likely you're wasting your time. If he wanted to change and make you happy, he would have done so.

3. No trust. No relationship.

If you can't trust each other- it is over. No amount of sex, gifts, laughs or alcohol will fix the bottom line. Once trust is gone, the relationship isn't going anywhere.

4. Being "content" isn't being happy.

Just because you're used to him, or feel comfortable doesn't mean you're happy. This takes some reflection: Are you happy? Or are you settling?

5. Distance can make the heart wander.

If you think that being apart will help the cause, well, NOT always. If your relationship is on the rocks, distance may just make you realize he isn't the one.

[lightbulb27]

you might be my X girlfriend! I wasn't bad, but I wasn't good for her nor her for me. you are correct. I don't agree with #5 in my case, but distance doesn't solve the underlying problems and thus can cause wander.

I think there is a lot more going on underneath of why the things above don't work and that is the valuable part... so in my opinion... I would stay in it long enough to understand what is going on in you and him then decide. Running from person to person to search for a perfect match is an approach, but you'll never deal with and address things in you that should be dealt with. so take time, and get counseling after dating or work on what went wrong and how you want to change.

People don't change so easily old childhood wounds and traumas and training are tough to eradicate and they control and dictate. People change when they want to or when they have to, and it doesnt' necessarily happen when someone else is giving them an ultimatum.

Our prior generations were better at just accepting each other as they are. With the abundance now and selfishness, we don't last as long and stay married like they did. Maybe we need to bring back some patience because no-body is perfect and we all have stuff to work on.

[RJGraveyTrain]

I'd have to say, as simple as these might seem to some, they're 100% correct.

[Anonymous]

And this is why women need to realize that just because he looks like this:

66.media.tumblr.com/.../...yv2qh1rwdv3lo1_1280.jpg

Doesn't mean he's your prince.

[myTake Owner]

mmmmmmmm

[ElissaDido]

😍😍😍😍

[Carefuloutthere]

I've never got this "hoping someone will change" thing. It makes no sense.
Why would you want or expect a person you enjoy being with to change who they are? When you fall for someone, didn't you fall for them BECAUSE of who they are? Not who you want them to be?

You know what someone is about when you get involved.
If you want to be with someone, you accept all that comes with them, no?

[Library]

These are good lessons you learned s2.quickmeme.com/.../...bfb9de61f53d61784b8245.jpg

[February12]

Lol 😂😂

[akadatank44]

Thats good and all. But I'm gonna bet people told you these and told you to end things during those 4 years and you never listened to them. Thats the hard part is to get someone to listen cuz they think at the time their SO is the best and they don't deserve better.

[NatashaJ]

So me 100% and this is why I won't repeat the same mistakes again.

[orphan]

strange when people split from 3yr + relationships. you'd think they'd realize all the pros n cons 12-16months in

[Browneye57]

Discernment is key. Everybody talks a good talk about NOT judging, but that's what we do, we have to do, to decide if things are right and good or not. NEXT! :)

[alfonsosloan45]

It depends on what you define as Mr. Right. If Mr. Right is 6'2 and extremely rich then good luck.

[Anonymous]

Best myTake I've read. Everything applies to the guy point of view, also. Hard won wisdom, I'm sure.

[zagor]

Four years turns almost every Mr/Ms Right into Mr/Ms Wrong.

[Zanecyber]

most woman waste their time looking for mr right anyway instead of working on their life

[zombiebabe]

wow! that was a nice mytake

[Anonymous]

Try couples counseling.

[pooper89]

Yeppers