Forgiveness May Never Come

Anonymous

Forgiveness May Never Come

Trust is a fragile thing. You can build upon it in a relationship for years, whether that be with family, friend, or partner, but when you break that, it can all come crashing down around you in an instant. When people put their trust or faith in you, they have a reasonable expectation that you will honor that. People trust you not to cheat on them, steal from them, lie about them or to them, or not cause other damage, harm, or commit crimes against themselves or others.

So what happens when some people break that trust and find themselves faced with the consequences? Well, some will actually demand that the offended party forgive them or forgive them when the offender feels it is time that they should be forgiven, as if there is a timeline on the hurt that they have caused. Forgiveness doesn't work that way. The offender does not get to decide when the offended will, if ever, choose to forgive them and it doesn't happen because that person has been sorry about it for 2 weeks, or 2 months, or 2 years. The offended must decide for themselves if you are worth keeping in their lives, or being around, or taking back, or accepting the wrongs you've done to them or their family and making some sort of peace with it.

Forgiveness May Never Come

We all make the choices we do in this life for better or worse, and when you violate someone's trust or faith in you, you should not expect that they should forgive you even if you have forgiven them for something else in the past. It's like people who "expect" others to be nice to them because they are nice---life isn't always tit for tat, and in the case of wrong doing, sometimes the other person or people feel as though there is no coming back from what you've done, and in some cases, like murder, they are right--there is no tomorrow for the loved ones they have lost.

Forgiveness, if it comes, takes time. You must through your actions prove to that person or people, that they may trust you again. Simply apologizing and saying, okay, I apologized, even if you've done it 10x, are just words which anyone can say and not mean. You have to be able to recognize the hurt and damage you've done and stop apologizing and start proving that what you've done was a mistake for which you will try your best to make amends, and even then, probably for a long time, or the rest of your life, that trust or faith placed in you again, will be shaky, because they know what you've done in the past to hurt them.

Forgiveness May Never Come

This is why you really have to ask yourself in situations where you have a choice to do the right thing or the wrong thing, if it's going to be worth it, if it means destroying a relationship with someone else. You cannot have the expectation that people will forgive you, or just get over it, or just get over it when you want them too. Every person has that breaking point where enough is enough, or what you've done is too much, and it's a dangerous game of chicken to play if you aren't prepared for the potential of your actions blowing up your life.

Forgiveness May Never Come
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