You're Alone For a Reason

[SketchForger]

This is going to be a short one.

But this is a message to a certain type of person.

And I'd like to present a poem...

You're alone for a reason.

You're not alone for the reasons you think.

Your fantastical obsession with your ideal partner which projects stereotypes of the sex in your interest (in order to be happy while trying to avoid dying alone) is only a self fulfilled prophecy.

You're not alone because you're special.

You're not a king, you're not a queen. You're not a prince, nor a princess.

You are just like everyone else, yet everyone else has a person who choose them as someone to be with.

You're not alone because no one understands you. You are only different in your interests, personality, and appearance.

You are neither in or out of anyone's league.

You're not alone because men and women are against you.

You're not a victim of society, you're a symptom of irrationality.

You're not alone because all men are shallow.

You do not settle.

You either have an inflated sense of worth, or an extremely deflated one. By this logic you cannot be allowed to be choosy either, no matter how much you want it to be that way.

You're not alone because all women are picky.

You are not above anyone because of your personality, your arrogance and insecurities leave you believe it so desperately.

By this logic, you would not date anyone who is not intelligent, yet you turn a blind eye to others that have a psychology degree, because they happen to be out of your league.

You're not alone because everyone hates you.

You hate yourself to an astonishing degree.

To the point of refusing any help,

and wallowing in your self pity.

You sit there with you left hand clenching your chest,

As your right hand clenched your crotch.

While your eyes are wet with sadness,

And your genitals are dry from the porn you watch.

Never mating,

Self hating,

And masturbating.

You cry yourself to sleep,

wishing to use love as a form of help.

But how can anyone truly love you,

if you don't even love yourself?

You're not alone because you were born to be.

You're alone because you live to be.

...

And yet... despite it all,

there's hope you never knew.

Someone with their back against the wall;

A man or woman just like you.

So don't waste your time on a crush,

Who is unaware of your feelings.

Look to those behind you,

Who have been there from the beginning.

Find love through comfort and familiarity,

Find something in them that they can't see.

Sift through conversation like they're nothing but sand,

and you'll eventually find someone who understands.

If you have hope, you'll be okay.

It doesn't even matter if you're gay.

You'll find the one and when you do,

The last thought on your mind will be about you.

So even when you have your flaws,

You're not a meal you need to season.

And even when confronted with nature's laws...

... We are all alone for a reason.

[BrutallyHonest87]

Too long and too incorrect for me to waste time reading

I'm alone because I'm happier alone.

ATTENTION ALL LONERS
It is okay to be happier alone. People like this just don't understand the difference between loneliness and being alone.

I myself feel more lonely in a crowd of friends than when I'm by myself or with 2-3 friends max.

It's ok to be a Lone Wolf.
It's ok to keep a small, tight knit group of friends.

I love myself more than anything or anybody on the fucking planet but, I am largely disgusted, appalled, and repulsed by almost all people.
It is rare that I find somebody who doesn't just completely fucking sicken me.

If you feel lonely, seek friends
If that doesn't do it, seek a lover

If you can do neither, seek happiness within

If that doesn't work then, perhaps the author's words may apply to you afterall

Just remember that it's ok for you to shun the societal norms of having lots of friends or fall in love or have kids or whatever bullshit it is that they're trying to shove down your throat.

Fuck society. What the fuck do other people know? Especially about you?

I'm happier alone, and you might be, too but, you won't know until you try it out and see how you like it

[SketchForger]

Dude your explanation was longer than my drunk half-assed myTake.

[BrutallyHonest87]

Not even half

[SketchForger]

You said you didn't read it.

My myTake is clearly targeted at those who blame others for their lack of company.

[BrutallyHonest87]

And my opinion is here to open their eyes to the possibility of subconscious self-sabbotage for good reason.

I didn't know it until later but, my last 3 relationships were sabotaged entirely by my subconscious because I wasn't happy with those women

Somebody offered me the same concepts I've offered here, and my eyes were opened.

Being in a relationship always made me miserable but, due to brain washing by society, I felt miserable being alone

And then I thought about it and realized I was built to be alone.

The title of your post is going to attract everybody who feels despair at being alone. Some may find you to be correct while others may think you are correct and then blame themselves and feel worse
That's why I commented

[SketchForger]

Well self hatred can become a great motivation sometimes. Hell it did wonders for me. Now I'm fully aware I hate myself, but I don't let that become anyone else's problem.

[BrutallyHonest87]

Why do you hate yourself? You're 19 dude.

Sure, you've grown but, you don't even know who you are or what your beliefs and values are yet

[BrutallyHonest87]

Your life is barely beginning

[SketchForger]

Dude it really doesn't matter when it's a chemical imbalance. I know who I am and what my morals are, I'm not going to radically change until my self animation training is complete.

[BrutallyHonest87]

I said the same shit at 19

And then the world drastically altered and improved my way of thinking

I have no idea what training you're talking about but, it sounds like you need a hug from somebody

[SketchForger]

Hm?

Oh my self hatred stems from pure (undiagnosed) mood swings. I don't think I have depression, but I think the municipal have enough to do with it, but they allow me to focus.

I use my self hatred as a way to remain humble, so I can look at things as if I'm a beginner, and can leant and experience more.

[BrutallyHonest87]

I'm not licensed to give any further opinions here

Good luck

[JimRSmith]

Excellent insight in this one to so many people who use this site.

For some of them, the truth of it stops at the line "You're alone because you live to be".

I used to think there was somebody for everybody, but one of the things my G@G experience has taught me is that certain individuals are so narcissistic and damaged that they really will be forever alone.

[Goodwifie]

But the narcissistic people aren't alone because they the best company in the world, themselves 😆

[JimRSmith]

@Goodwifie Hahahaha, yes, I'd forgotten that salient point, lol

[Goodwifie]

All they need in life is a mirror 😆

[SketchForger]

I also never implied that they would be involved in a healthy relationship. It's my way of being wholesome, but subtly grim as well.

[Dchrls78104]

@Goodwifie The narcissist will never be in a healthy relationship, or happy in a relationship, because he/she appreciates no one.

[Anonymous]

Every person is special man in some way and unique.
You got it wrong
It's just some people happened to be more lucky in their lives than others or the connections and pursue their dreams

[SketchForger]

Luck really isn't a thing. Everything is already set into motion. We all act based upon the environment we are in and the information we are given and are aware of at the time.

Choosing not to socialize only lessens people's chances of meeting anyone, choosing to project their anger for their shortcomings towards others will only push people away from you. (I'm using "you" as a general btw)

Taking initiative to socialize and accept when life tends to throw you a bone. Luck doesn't have anything to do with people who desire romantic company.

[Opinion Owner]

When I say luck I mean that some people were at the right place and time and took the chance. Some people never had that chance presented to them. Life is like a dice. You might never win but you also might win everything..

So I think it's worthwhile waiting

[jessicake]

This hits hard because I used to believe things like this and it’s even harder to let those things you feel go. How amazing it is you brought all point into one poem

[SketchForger]

I feel that recognizing these feelings and letting them go is all part of growing up. I personally have an advantage due to my sexuality, but even as a kid I bought into the whole "nice guys finish last" thing, but it was a bit different. I would feel bad about myself as a human rather than say it's other people's fault, I'd think it was because I was too weak. I talked about it to my mom. My mom knew my personality well, and knew all I wanted as a kid was to make others happy and help people, so she said something I'll never forget... "It's OK to feel small in a world where everyone talks big, it's easy to feel weak when everyone acts strong, but you're the biggest and strongest of all, because you don't have to hide who you are." (not all she said but that's the only thing I remember the most) but what I took from that wasn't that I was the biggest and strongest (since my apathy tones that down) I now look at things as if I don't have to hid who I am.

I do things, that's who I am.

[Goodwifie]

Okay all jokes aside with Jim, this take was a very interesting read. Thank you.

[CherryRoseChampange]

Shit, I'm never alone. Not saying that because I'm not single but because if there is one person I can bet on it's my goddamn self. Unless I become mentally ill of course.

[SketchForger]

Nah, if you do you'll still have plenty of conversations with yourself. :)

[StingRayxoxo]

Reminds me of something I’ve heard before in a movie.

[StingRayxoxo]

Pastor: Everything is more complicated than you think. You only see a tenth of what is true. There are a million little strings attached to every choice you make; you can destroy your life every time you choose. But maybe you won't know for twenty years. And you may never ever trace it to its source. And you only get one chance to play it out. Just try and figure out your own divorce. And they say there is no fate, but there is: it's what you create.

[StingRayxoxo]

And even though the world goes on for eons and eons, you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second. Most of your time is spent being dead or not yet born. But while alive, you wait in vain, wasting years, for a phone call or a letter or a look from someone or something to make it all right. And it never comes or it seems to but it doesn't really. And so you spend your time in vague regret or vaguer hope that something good will come along. Something to make you feel connected, something to make you feel whole, something to make you feel loved. And the truth is I feel so angry, and the truth is I feel so fucking sad, and the truth is I've felt so fucking hurt for so fucking long and for just as long I've been pretending I'm OK, just to get along, just for, I don't know why, maybe because no one wants to hear about my misery, because they have their own. Well, fuck everybody. Amen.

[Fgnbvcgghj]

I think this is interesting. But, I can't agree.

Usually the person behind you, the person you say I should find out about, is the person I'm not attracted to. And usually, its for a reason as to why I'm not attracted to them. I simply can't disregard what attracts me for someone who is just aching to love someone else.

But, regardless of my thoughts, its an Intersting take.

[SketchForger]

This is usually something that happens with me due to my sexuality. I have a mental blind spot sometimes when it comes to attraction, but I already established that nobody is entitled to you for chasing after you. My "person behind you" metaphor was not the person who has been crushing on you while you crushed on someone else, it's someone who shares the same boat with you, someone who genuinely wants to meet people as much as you do. Someone who's similar. And even if it doesn't work out, there will be a reason. There always will be a reason.

[Fgnbvcgghj]

I live in that mental blind spot, bro. I totally get that.

It doesn't get to me as much as it did when I was younger, but I still get that. I've honestly concluded that its me. Its not the other person. Even though I'm not entitled to someone else's time, I totally understand it's my fault for not making the time spent with me a more worthwhile experience. I realize I'm boring and I've become okay with this. The best part of feeling the way I do, though is how much I put myself at risk in life. I chase after adrenalin now. Bungee jumping, training in parkour, practicing climbing, etc... Those things make me forget about my lack of value and what I fail to bring in virtually every interaction.

Basically, I just do shit to forget about life.

[curiousscorpio89]

Based on your take, and your replies to others opinions. It seems as if this entire take is a message to yourself, and others with similar mindsets. If you have so much self awareness, and understand exactly why you are lonely, you should do something about it. There is a difference between choosing to be alone or simply not looking, and feeling lonely and wishing you weren't. There are so many reasons why someone could be in either category. I dont think you can categorize everyone to one reason like this. I pity you for the fact that you hate yourself. You should use that intelligence that you clearly have to figure out a way to change that poor self image you have.

[SketchForger]

Lol no, the point is if it doesn't apply to you, then you don't have anything to worry about.

[smg99]

Wonderful composition. I’m alone because I’ve experienced quite a handful of drama and prickly situations with guys. Even with my crush who acted like he was visibly upset and avoided me, for a joke shared not at him but on food. Now I don’t bother looking forward to seeing him either. Next time I see him i will remind myself how obnoxiously he treated me and made me incredibly sad.
Sometimes we are alone because others have the named psychological disorders, and we are reeling from it not because we assume a higher worth. We are in self dialogue.

[Anonymous]

It's alvwry well and I hate people that are like you describe and I'm the situation to do somthing about it. The problem I have is I live in a tow. That women are a substantial minority like dramatically, around 5 - 1 guys so who am I supose to date when they all have boyfriends, I've tried LDR and it's ended in me being cheated on so what's the point it's all very well writing a poem blanketing every one who can't find a partner as the self hating type but fuck you when you say it's the truth. You clearly have a narrow mind view and would advise you to add a point of clarity saying the difference because that the moment there are real reasons why people can't find lobe and you are treating it like it's just said persons ego, get off your soap box.

[SketchForger]

Your situation isn't special.

[Opinion Owner]

I know it's not I never said it was I'm just saying that to blanket everyone who can't meet somone as a self hating sap is ignorant and disingenuous

[SketchForger]

Which isn't happening, I've addressed it to this type of person only, if you're not that type of person. Cheers.

[Kaneki05]

Nah i was just born to be alone and half the reasons at the start.
I am alone cause no one understands me and maybe someone out there might be able to, but i will never meet them.

I am alone and i know exactly why but i can't and, don't want to change my personailty so screwed to be single my life.

[SketchForger]

Well if you are aware, yet don't want to do anything about it, at least you aren't blaming anyone else.

[Kaneki05]

True but i do blame time cause if life didn't fade away so fast, and we had much more time on this earth it would be much easier to have less regrets and more time to meet someone.

[SketchForger]

You're only... Your age is accurate right?

[Kaneki05]

Yep, but i am old enough to know how fast a year goes by, this one went by so fast and i din't talk to anyone really and haven't made any friends and nothing has really changed.

And that has been the same for a couple of years now so i realised that time passes by fast, And people really need more time

[serious]

Of course people who are alone have reason (s) for sure. It's obvious because being alone is a choice, it's voluntary.

[SketchForger]

In terms of actual sociology? No that isn't really true.
Not everyone has a crowd, some are lucky to even have a family that understands them, if they grew up with a biological family at all.
Some develop healthy coping mechanisms, some develop unhealthy ones.
You can cause people to dislike you and leave, but you can't force anyone to like you. You can't always have people around who will have your back unless you're a bit charismatic and able to empathize with them. Earning friendship is not easy, but NOT trying to might be the choice you're referring to.

[serious]

You have a point.

[Anonymous]

The philosophical question is; would you date yourself?

I once was in a relationship with a girl who thought the exact same way I do. I never admittted it to her, but she definitely spoke up about it.

However I saw things in her that I didn’t like because it reminded me of things about myself that I didn’t like. And despite her being madly in love with me for almost an entire year... most likely vice versa. Especially at the end.

She broke up with me mostly because I wanted her too. But than I found myself with a huge void. A part of me is now lost forever.

Point being is got to love yourself first. My bet is that most people on GaG don’t have a high self esteem. Even the asshole guys on her and the bitchy girls are having problems.

Respect yourself first. Than being lonely won’t be so bad. It when it isn’t so bad all the sudden you will find someone else interested in you. Because you are comfortable with who are.

[SketchForger]

I'm actually really glad you brought this up. I actually avoid people who are similar to my personality because of my self hatred.

[Opinion Owner]

They are actually best for you in the long run. They UNDERSTAND you better than most.

I regret driving my ex into dumping me. She wanted absolutely nothing to do with me afterwards (I naively thought otherwise).

[SketchForger]

I know they are, but I also know that I see more of my flaws when avoiding people than I do my... I don't think I'd call them strengths but... You get the idea.

[CerealLovingGirl]

I like the kind of boys that nobody really likes. Maybe they get mad a lot or because they are too quiet. I think those people are interesting. I think everyone is interesting to an extent. I could sit down with ANYONE and have an amazing conversation about what they dreamt about last night. What they think is beyond our solar system and the stars we see. I think there needs to be more people that are willing to do that.

[JohnBoinka]

I am Alone Because I Knew that Everyone that I'M GONNA LOVE TODAY... Will Eventually GONNA DIE TOMORROW!!!
Do you know How to Solve this PROBLEM? hehehe
Nice Poem...

[SketchForger]

U gonna kill ur crushes dood?

[JohnBoinka]

Not to KILL actually... They will Continue to LIVE but more alike ZOMBIES... hehehe...

[Youngin392]

I’m alone because I trust no one. I barely trust myself.

[SketchForger]

Your profile gave me a good chuckle, take a thumb up.

[Rangers]

All I got from this was "it's your own fault you're alone". Ok, you could've said that a lot quicker than that, lol.

[SketchForger]

That's simple, yes.

But is helpful? Not really.

Am I helping?

Probably not.

[Lance1965]

Very true.

Some people are alone because they made themselves that way. Some people will be alone forever because they refuse to make the changes that are needed to better themselves.

Very few people are alone because they want to be...

[fay23]

Wow I really loved this, i agree with you as a single person. I've remained single because it's stupid to have expections of your lover while they must accept you for your flaws and have unconditional love while you have conditions. Change for the better and realize that sometimes you are the toxic person.

[Edanurus]

This reads like someone who would say 'depressed? Just stop being sad'. Lonlyness is a much more complex issue than you are making it out to be.

[SketchForger]

I could write about that, but there's no broad audience in this poem.

This actually addresses "no sweet-heart" loneliness more than any other type, which is a sub section of intra personal loneliness.

This poem addresses how to not internalize that and take it out on others. Because in the end nothing causes you to be alone more than trying to drag others into it.

[FictionalCharcter]

So, what you’re saying...

people are alone through their thoughts, actions, and life choices.

I just saved a whole paragraph to second guess myself, third guess myself, fourth guess myself.

Human beings know their thought and actions.

[kojikurac]

I just don't look for someone.
That's why I'm alone.

[SketchForger]

And that's perfectly healthy behavior.

[kojikurac]

@SketchForger
My life my choices.
I don't bother anybody, just have lot's stuff to do first.

[SketchForger]

Sounds great, keep your stride goin'.

[ChloeInABun]

Yes, yes, yes. This is 900% true. I can't vocalise enough how much I agree.