How should I tell my soon to be fiance who loves children that I am actually infertile? (Page 2)
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Tell her. Give her options? Adoption? How would you feel if she got a sperm donor? There are options you need to discuss.
These people at right tell her if she really loves you she well understand. She needs to know and you might feel better telling her because you do e her too . She might be upset for while , but she won't be mad for that long. Well good luck
It comes down to if she really loves you, it may cause fighting, but nothing to leave you over. You should let her know as soon as possible. If she finds out too late she could get very mad at the fact you just told her at that point. Don't be afraid, because it is the right thing to do
Tell her. If she loves you, she will stay and you guys can discuss other options (such as adoption and sperm doners). Personally, I believe you should have told her sooner, but I don't believe that will effect the way she feels about you. Honestly, she might be upset for a while but if you explain, I'm sure she will understand.
Congrats on the engagement, by the way!
You do know and realise that you simply have to do the decent thing and TELL HER.
Just imagine for one moment if she didn't tell you that she was infertile and unable to conceive, until you were both married.
Food for thought I think... Hopefully you will agree.
This is serious- you probably should have told her this a long time ago, so this is not a conversation to put of. Just sit down with her, hold her hand, and explain to her your situation, no lying, no hiding the truth, if she has questions answer them honestly. Expect her to be upset- it's distressing news, but give her time to work through it and be there to comfort her while she does. If she is the woman you think she is, she'll stay by your side. Real love stands strong even through hardship.
1. Are you sure you are sterile or you just think you are?
2. you could have save your genitals if you seeked medical help
3. You should have told your current girl earlier about this, but do it now. Better later than never. If you indeed are sterile, you cannot make her pregnant. Its just a fact. Your options are adoption and fertilixing her with some donated sperm.
But anyways you should tell her.
Yes I am. I had expected the pain to go away after a few days, but it only got worse. The topic never came up and I never got the chance to..
You are? So the doctors have confirmed that? Well you should have gone to hospital straight away but thats in the past.
Don't lie. Im sure you have had plenty of chances, you have dated over a year right? Quit the excuses, sit down with her and talk to her about this. If she is nice and lovely like you say, she will understand.
Yes, they have confirmed that due to the damage to the testicular region, I cannot produce sperm. I did not go straight away as I expected the pain to go away after some time, like the other times I have been hit in that area in the past. We did have many chances, but my self esteem is poor enough without her knowing I lost my manhood to a kick to the testicles from a woman. I wouldn't want her perception of me to change.
Well you should not have waited for the pain to go away. Most people would have gone hospital straight away.
Well you lost many chances, now it's time for you to finally tell her. She deserves to know. What if she waited for the altar to say " I have schizophrenia"
Would you let her get pregnant some other way? Like through a sperm donor?
She should understand. It's not your fault. I would be bummed but, I would get over it assuming that we would have children some other way.
I'm really sorry this happened to you. It made me so angry.
We both had a bit much to drink at the time, and I was not expecting her to kick me there at all. Even after she did, I expected the swelling to go down in a few days and everything would be normal again.
No I'm sorry that's no fucking excuse. You never kick a man in the balls unless it's for self defense.
Were you about to kill her or rape her? I don't think so.
You don't make someone sterile. It's a sick thing to do.
I'm sorry I'm ranting. I'm angry.
In any case I wouldn't break up with you because of that.
Have you gone to fertility doctors? It's so advanced these days. There's nothing they could do?
My only intention had been to ends things in person with her rather than via text, like a man. Little did I know what she did to me would make me less of a man instead. There isn't much that can be done, and even then it is not guaranteed to work.
😤😤😤😤
There's always a chance. You should at least try. Otherwise there are other options. But, you need to tell her you can't keep it from her most likely she'll understand. (I absolutely LOVE kids and I'd understand).
Again I'm so so sorry that happened to you.
I never expected my life to change so much from a few blows to that area. What makes it worse is that my ex-girlfriend brags about it to her friends, and I cannot help but walk by them in shame if I happen to meet them outside.
I just don't get it. Can you explain to me how she was able to do that?
There's nothing to be ashamed about.
sweety I am infertile. just like that. onward to the point you should ask her how she would feel if you didn't want kids and if she is okay with it you can tell her that you can't have kids. the reason you do this is because the former is worse than the latter and she would be more relived to know you just can't have kids rather than you hate them. But take what I say with a grain of salt.
You have to be honest with her and let her know. It will be unfair to her if she doesn't know about your inability to father children especially if she so desires them. Trust your love and friendship and talk to her so you both can decide what you would like to to do in the future.
you said you can't produce sperk at all?
Artificial insemination IS still possible, but it'll be costly. And temporarily quite painfull for you.
The key? Bone marrow holding stem cells.
The problem? If i recall right there's no way to use anaestetics during the extraction. I hope i'm wrong though.
With a few of them they can grow sperm cells from stem cells, and thus creacte enough sperm cells to inseiminate her.
Your kids, your genes, and your sperm. Technically speaking.
You should have told her yesterday. but from the way you describe your relationship, I think she loves you enough to look past it. You two need to talk things over before getting married. She deserves to know what she is signing up for. I really hope you two find happiness. Your ex is a monster. this is so tragic.
You have to tell her. That can actually break a marraige up. If you tell her soon enough it will save bith of you the trouble. You HAVE TO TELL HER. of not she will become depressed. Gently tell her and suggest adopting or surrogate or even sperm donor. So sorry what happened to you and im glad she was accountable for it. Hopefully one day somehow you do have a chiod of your own. I've heard stories where men can't have kids but miraculously had one. (and yes DNA were done to make sure lol)
Tell her. There's no shame in admitting you got kicked in the nuts if you don't let it ruin your chances at a family. I don't mean to make light of it, that's a truly horrible thing to happen, but it doesn't have to ruin a near engagement, let alone a marriage.
I have been kicked in the past before, but the pain usually went away in a few hours. I never expected this time to be different, and it destroyed so much of my life.
You should tell her, im sure she is going to understand it and you can look for solutions or treatments. Maybe there's something that can help you to have a son.
If not, you can think about adopting or go to an sperm bank.
Im not sure tho if you surely know that you are. You can think you are but if the doctors don't confirm that you are you can't say that. So until you aren't 100% sure about it dont tell anything to her.
You need to tell her before you get married, as soon as possible. Sorry to hear about that, this is why a guy shouldn't just stand there and let a girl hit him just because she's a girl, they can do damage despite pretending otherwise when it suits them.
1. Yes, you should tell her. If you're serious to the point of marriage you should be serious enough to tell her anything. It's best she knows because it effects her, too.
2. This isn't an end all thing. I've heard of people before who were "infertile" actually managing to have a kid. It was just pure luck once but it totally happened. Not to mention, there's always adoption, and you won't know if she's okay with that until you talk.
This is kind of funny. Because you can always get a sperm donor. Now the funny thing is it can be your brother, your nephew, your cousin, or even your dad... how cool would that be... that your son is actually the byproduct of your dad and your wife...
Telling her is the best. If she loves you she would be willing to adopt children or get a sperm donation 😨😨😨😨 I feel really bad for you after reading this!!! 😢😢😢😢
You need to tell her now. You should have told her before things got this serious. Practice how you're going to say it, but be ready for anything. She might be really upset that you deceived her.
Wow. That's really sad to hear. I think it's pretty clear you need to tell your girlfriend before things get more serious. If she's as great as you say then it won't be problem. There are still options out there for you.