Why men hide there feelings to a girl that they like?

Question

why some man/men are hiding their feelings to the girl they like.

neos7m · Accepted Answer

This is a very complex question. There are many situations in which a guy would want to do so.
First, fear of the infamous friendzone. I've been friendzoned only once in my life, and it's the most painful experience ever. There's no escaping it, unless you try to rebuild everything from scratch, and that most of the times means not seeing each other for months, maybe years. So, if I fell in love again with a friend, I'd never tell her, not even if I'm sure she likes me back (in that case, I would just go and kiss her, which has always worked in my short experience).
Another reason might be the "out of my league" reasoning. I've never believed in such things - as I say, we're all the same when we're laid and naked: rich people, famous people, and people out of anybody's league - but some people truly believe in it. Their biggest fear is that, if they told the girl, she could go around mocking them with her friends, and that would be even worse than the friendzone.
Last, but not least, like I said before some people just don't believe in telling their crush they like her. I'm one of them. I would constantly hide my feelings up to the very moment when I'm sure I have a 100% chance of succeeding, and then I would kiss her, taking her by surprise. It's not the kiss alone that usually works: it's the combination of kiss and surprise. That also gives me a backup plan in case my calculations were wrong: in that case she'd just ask «Why did you do that?», and I'd answer «I don't know, I felt like doing it. It was the heat of the moment». That might even convince her to kiss again... all of this, of course, only works if I've been good enough hiding my feelings.

GoodManDave · Accepted Answer

I've been taught by women that showing any sign of interest is something they don't want me doing. I get screamed at or sneered at for trying to flirt. I was screamed at for 5 minutes for calling a girl "a cutie."

It's survival. If you say "Hey, I like your glasses" and you get treated as if you have the worst fashion sense in the world, or you get sneered at, or an eye roll, or get screamed or laughed at for relatively innocent things like that... then you learn not to do that stuff.

Part of it can be "fear" of humiliation, but it's also a part of just not wanting to go through the hassle because it's not fun. It's like if you bring up something unimportant, and it always starts a fight, you eventually stop trying to bring it up because you want to avoid the attitude.
0

Mikaychay95 · Accepted Answer

Maybe the same reason why some girls hide their feelings? Do you mean they hide them in general or if someone asks if they like them and they deny it? I had a friend who was obsessed with this guy and when he asked if he liked her she said no. Like, you could have missed out on something truly special!

MargaritaPeach · Accepted Answer

I don't think they hide them, necessarily. I think they just show them as opposed to voicing them. My man doesn't say that he loves me all that often, but his actions prove it. I'd rather have that than the other way around.

sunshine_2300 · Accepted Answer

I wish I knew my ex is very confusing and will not talk about "us" but does things as if there is an "us" :(

findingdreamland · Accepted Answer

They want to be sure their feelings are responded. Like all of us. No one wants to get hurt.

DamanMannn · Answer

We take too long to think of " THE PLAN " to succeed with the girl, and end up
fucking ourselves over. ( kidding ~ )

Lets say, If you were a cat, Would you just go up to a dog ( playfully ) pat him on the head and expect the dog to not bark and chase you til your up a tree? most men , or rather, humans are raised differently, our environment usually determine our personality, also our balls to say things and the way
"GOOD parents raise us" but that's the gist of it.

Were afraid to take risks with a woman's heart.
we might be the cat ending up on the tree or we may be the dog continually harassing the cat.
it goes both ways.

Nik1hil · Answer

The fear of losing her is the top reason. one of the reason the guys today's use  p*rn  to satisfy there need instead of a getting a affection from a real lady If she says no we might even commit suicide if the guy is more sentimental. We would rather bury our true feeling for her then to tell her our exact feelings and hear no from her in exchange. If girls start saying later or like set up another time for it. Then maybe boys will gladly start showing there true feelings and trust me you will amazed by the fact that how good some guys are.

nadimzahery · Answer

If a man see a girl just outside, super-market, anyvr. if he likes her on the spot or he feel something for her, he is not going to tell her
If a Girl is Class-Mate, Work Family, or else. Now He knows the girl, he will be judging her every movement he will try to have her attention by representing some gestures, body language, or will try to look at her. and he will be waiting for 1% interest from her so that he can start talking to her. if a guy is very flirtatious. and he knows about the girls, he will simply understand and will get her attention easily if he is new will be hard for him

ArchivalMars2 · Answer

It's for a number of reasons mainly because we assume too much. We judge the girl thinking that she wouldn't even consider being friends let alone being a girlfriend, and sometimes if it's really bad it's that she's with someone else who we view as better than we could be. I of all people know this because I've been there. I had a chance to the girl I love that I was in love with her and I still can't. All because I thought she wouldn't even look twice in my direction. I still think about her even today when I see her.

Alex_from_mcdonalds · Answer

Lots of answers from other guys. I hope this one is the shortest but best. Guys hide their feels because;
1: they are scared of what you'll think.
2: that it'll ruin the whole friendship and the both of you stop talking.
3: is just really nervous to even talk about it.
4: they don't hid their feelings and the get it out piece by piece at a time> they basically tell you but you have to be paying attention to notice. Body language. Emotions. Actions.
Tell me if this helped?

Mysterio421 · Answer

You have it wrong it's not hiding it. It's just not showing it. Typically it's a turn off and makes you look weak in a woman's eyes. Society says that guys shouldn't express our feelings and emotions. Besides, when you put in emotion into a relationship or any kind and typically when it goes wrong, it may hit hard. I don't waste my time doing that while emotional stuff and then get an emotional blow to the face. No thank you

godfatherfan · Answer

Because women stomp and trample on mens feelings. they belittle the guy and make him sorry he opened his mouth. Or then they see the guy in a different light and it could end the relationship.
If a woman see's a man crying... she will then not see him as the tough "protector" and loose respect for him. So now she feels he cannot protect her and the relationship is gone...

OpenClose · Answer

I told a friend of mine she had a cute smile once. Her friends started spreading rumors that I was a sexual predator and I received death threats and an assault.

I'd be perfectly fine telling a girl she is attractive if it wasn't goddamned hate speech.

Voice · Answer

... for protection of being Damaged psychologically... or do you prefer a whole genda of rain mans walking around' it's not called hiding it's called guarding' we need to protect or I should say I need to protect myinvestment called values so we or I can be good husbands, fathers, providers, and teachers... now if we are all punked out by bad experience and or relationships how can we do that... right?

ChivalryExists · Answer

Personally girls like when i show emotion. They aren't use to it, its just not the social norm. My guess is because girls dont find a kind guy as attractive they like the feel and attitude of a macho man. Like i can hold my own probably better than most, im not small. Im just very blunt and speak my mind. I don't know, dating is a game and our generation is fucked because of the social norms.

DarkHumorRUs · Answer

Why some women hide their feelings to the guy they like?

Heathrowguy · Answer

Not sure sometimes if the feelings will fade I suppose. Some guys need to be full-on like close to 100 percent that their feelings are on max level.
Sometimes it's too late & the girl is unobtainable.
Sometimes don't want to express feelings as might loose the partner/friend.
Sometimes it's just we know the girl kniws our feelings & we don't need to express them any further.
Can't speak for all guys.

Sattymike · Answer

Some of it is probably fear of rejection. But there is an element of playing it cool. Some women find it more attractive when a guy pays them less attention. It sounds counter intuitive but it's sort of like how many women give little interest to the 'nice guys'. No challenge, no respect I guess.

bloodmountain1990 · Answer

Because were worried it might come off strong and ruin it. Sometimes girls don't give off hunts that they like a person and if us guys say something that comes off strong were seen as needy. Then there's times where girls will show interest, and once we show it back they ditch us because were not a "challenge" rolls eyes.

Bugiman · Answer

When I do this. It is mostly because i think the girl isn't interested in me at all. So why show feelings to get rejected anyways and be awkward after. Better to stay friends and get over your feelings, they'll fade away anyway.
Other times I do it to look a bit cooler then i truly am ;). And not to scare the girl off if you start talking about feelings and shit too soon

DeltaDanner · Answer

They are playing it safe. Rejection is one of the top fears us guys have, and you can't be rejected if you don't try. Also we are worried about getting hurt. Showing emotions put so much on the line, and some guys can't handle that.

Hawkeye6736 · Answer

Because they don't know how to act on those feelings. They know the feelings aren't mutual. They feel it would make things awkward. Or he's scared he's going to end up hurt
It's usually one if those from my experience

Applefan1 · Answer

A lot of times I admit my feelings to many girls NOT all but many of them I end up wishing I never did.

ogutbomb · Answer

I've to be doubly sure, before I tell her. I've to minimise my risk of rejection, for I fear it a lot and may not be able to take it very well. So, I hide my feelings, keep entering into casual talks and only once I'm fairly certain that she also has feelings for me, I'd express mine and not hide it anymore.

Schoolman · Answer

If a guy expresses his interest in a girl in the first few months, 9 out of 10 relationships go sour due to this. We can deny it all we want, but dating is a game.

Macerman · Answer

For myself it's because I'm afraid of rejection. I like this girl right now and even posted a question here about it. But i'm afraid she won't go for coffee with me and then i'm at a loss for words because i've been talking to her for a few months now but to afraid to ask her out when I have an attraction lol. thats me though,

Dtherockhaugen · Answer

They are scared of losing that person, or feeling creepy. If the person they like doesn't like them back, they are scared they would feel extremely upset, and you know, rejection does hurt. So they hide it as much as possible.

Longjacketanx · Answer

Feelings? What are these feelings you speak of¿
In all seriousness though for me it's because women seem put off by them if they are shown too soon
Also if you have a boyfriend most of us wouldn't dare.

SerUmbras · Answer

Nerves? The possibility of being rejected is a blow to the male ego. The reality is a blow to their self esteem. So, rather than risking such a fate, some guys will ignore/hide their feelings.

Ain't we just geniuses?

4kicks · Answer

Guys have to hide there feelings from woman for various reasons. It could be a sign of weakness on our part or cause women tend to like to play games. If i guy is to easy she usually moves on. I'm in a simular situation where I'm very much in love with a woman and we're kinda together but i can't give her all i am because I'm scared to lose her

shiiiet · Answer

Depends. Maybe the guy is scared to reveal his feeling in the chance he gets rejected. Maybe he doesn't want to creep out the girl by saying anything cause he thinks it's too fast. That's mostly it.

Ricky_Bobby · Answer

For me currently it's because i know she doesn't want a relationship yet. But before I learned that it was because I was worried about being rejected and saying i liked someone who had no reciprocal feelings.

ranma187 · Answer

all sorts of reasons. She's giving mixed signals, reminds me too much of an ex. Sometimes I will talk to a girl and compliment her, then go silent, and force her to fill the next ackward gap. If she doesn't she probably doesn't really like me.

Alex1991 · Answer

Because those are the type of man that don't know about love. Or they had their hearts broken in the past by an ex girlfriend that they fell in love with.

justincaseo_o · Answer

To me it shows weakness and gives the young lady an opportunity to use that weakness for bad purposes. I wouldn't want to be used in a wrong way. Hope this made sense.

RaCeRKiD5 · Answer

Because girls have a habit of ripping our heart out whenever we do.

Sorrinrp · Answer

Well from my own experiences its because women can be very hurtful and make you feel worthless immediately after you spill you guts to em.

dE_logics · Answer

That's it's something very personal. It makes me feel less masculine. Also they fall in love real quick when they tell these things to a girl. These things are reserved for my wife only.

zinithin · Answer

Because some women use a man's emotions against them to get what they want? The man doesn't want to look weak? The man doesn't want his emotions to be rejected, fear of emotional pain?

gaco66 · Answer

A man can be just as shy and unconfident as a girl can. I screwed up in 2 or 3 possible relationships just because I waited and waited to tell a girl what I feel. So to make a guy say what he wants sometimes girls have to show just a little bit more interest in the guy. This way he will see what she wants a he will say what needs to be said. After all if like a person so much does it matter who showed interest first?

ThisGuy42 · Answer

The fear of rejection. Or there lazy. Men are stupid I know I am one. So like once there comfortable they might reveal there feelings. If they don't there lazy and it doesn't matter anyway.

serg11 · Answer

Usually If I do hide them, I just do it because I am feeling tired of getting hurt. Also sometimes If I don't see enough investment in her part, I'll assume she doesn't like me and move on.

Squall17 · Answer

Because they don't want them to think they are weak in any way. Also maybe because we think that once you see that you've finished with us and want to get it out of someone else instead if you know what I mean.

skydivecowboy · Answer

After being through things I've been through in life. If I met someobe I liked, I would sit back and looj at the big picture. Guys act tough but if they are actually serious then we are going to make sure its for real. Otherwise a player just don't care.

billy420 · Answer

Same as girls really. Just fear getting rejected, especially harder if you care for someone because you are not sure if their response. Some play it off but I think we all feel it

nosweat2012 · Answer

I used to do this when i was much shyer tha pn I am now, and I did it because I was scared of rejection. However I will also do it so that I dont come on too strong and appear needy

SecretSomeone · Answer

Fear of being rejected, I tried not to be fearful and talked to a girl, talked for a couple of days and then she started rejecting me. I regret nothing. :D

TheBBD · Answer

Well actually she is hiding her feelings. And when i ask her why she does that, she likes it but still no response. lol

SpeakNoEvil · Answer

Guys usually have more to lose in terms of rejection and embarrassment especially if they aren't that confident.

LokiOfEngland · Answer

I'm going to keep my opinion and feelings hidden on this matter.

Jeffrey625625 · Answer

As a teenager i think it's logical, but as an adult, i think the dating phase/age should get you out of that.

dthdhdghadh · Answer

For the same reason girls do. Probably, I can only assume.

dav123 · Answer

Because most girls seem put off if you express feelings too quickly.

Ignitethefire · Answer

its all about Fear of rejection when it comes to relationships, we all want great things from our friendships and relationships. Sometimes its just hard

croxy · Answer

Personally for me, it's a way to not get attached. If I don't want a relationship, if she have a boyfriend, if it's someone living too far away etc etc I don't wanna fall for her.

White_Wolf3 · Answer

I fell in love for this girl once, i've thought about her everyday ever since i realized, i could never get myself to it because i was pretty sure she don't like back, like at all

TheFlavour · Answer

There usually fear being rejected by the girl they like. Which I've witnessed many times lol

SkaterDude · Answer

women can shut you off quite easily without any regrets

Mr_Ski · Answer

They're not hiding. They really don't care. No, I'm just kidding. It's tough at a young age. It gets easier.

Gamer47 · Answer

I guess guys like to look more presentable to the girls. Because if they push their luck too far, they will viewed the wrong way to the girl.

aissamo · Answer

he is afraid from the refuse of the girl  but when he feeling that girl like him  he will traying to tell her.

GoldEmblem · Answer

In all honesty, even at an older age, telling a girl or letting you know you like her automatically makes you less liked by the girl.

albundyfan · Answer

Well I dont hide them. I always tell the girl after I feel I've gotten to know her well enough. 85% of the time I get a different answer than I was looking for but at least I dont have to wonder.

JSmuve · Answer

Because I get rejected more times than I care to admit.

Tomsta · Answer

Fear of rejection, thinking they arn't good enough, girl giving off wrong signals, male stubbornness... could go on

Why men hide there feelings to a girl that they like?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why do guys hide their feelings for a girl?

Why men hide there feelings to a girl that they like?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why do guys hide their feelings for a girl?

We're glad to see you liked this post.