That awkward silence after a fight: How to deal with it?

[Skylark23]

After a heated argument , where you both blame each other for starting the fight, what is the best thing to do in the days after it if you have not made up?

Me and my boyfriend argued yesterday afternoon, and we have not seen each other since than, even though we live on the same street. in my opinion he was grumpy and impaitent with me for no reason, so I refused to go out with him and I took my dog and went home,

I said he was acting like an arsehole and that he might get his wish of not being with me anymore ( I have no idea why I said that, but he said a few things previously that made me feel like he isn't taking this 14 month relationship seriously)

So now we have not spoken and I am seriously doubting this relationship as I feel like we are drifting apart and it's not leading anywhere at the moment. I do love him, and I do want to be with him but the more he acts like a dick because of his Icewall, the more I react to his bait and than we argue again.

Shall I wait for him to contact me or shall I contact him? It seems I am always the intiator as well after most arguements so this time shall I get on with my things and stop worrying? And is it normal to have this feeling of dredd or the feeling of preparing myself for a break up? Even though we are normally as strong as a rock...

[Anonymous]

If you love him then get in touch with him. It shows you place more value on your relationship than your pride. Relationships only work if there is mutual communication, but at times like this, one of you has to initiate the communication , or nothing will be resolved. All relationships have there problems , but it is having the ability to overcome them together that is most important. Love is never measured by the good times, it's measured by the bad times. If you are both stubborn , then it is quite pointless being together, as the relationship will have more unhappy times than happy

[Stacyzee]

Since you are always the initiator of allowing things to be on talking terms again.
I suggest that you continue to stand back, and allow him to come to you this time.
To me, that is an IMPORTANT test in a relationship.
You want to see if your other partner is the type to want to resolve a problem with you.
That shows a mature quality.
It also shows someone that's willing to want to make things work no matter how heated things get.

[Skylark23]

I was thinking that I will let him contact me, the last time this happened I asked him why he didn't contact me after an argument.
And he said he thought I was still mad at him and that he was waiting for me to contact him... Thing is he rarely wants to resolve the problem and he pushes them away like they do not exist.

Which leaves me reeling inside wanting to talk, so when an argument arises it all comes out! Don't get me wrong, every other aspect is great in the relationship, but this issue comes up once or twice a month which is getting tiresome. Thanks for your advice!

[Stacyzee]

No problem!
My guy used to be like that.
I tried the same method.
It eventually worked.
I was shocked when he came around.

He considered my advice.
He was like "You are right, I should try to open up more after an argument".
He always gets rather cold, and doesn't talk at all.

[Jaydog666]

If he's really stubborn he might never make contact first. Next time u see him it could be months and he might be out with another girl. This happened with an ex of mine, she still missed and wanted me but it was to late. Men are much more black and white than women.

[Succcesssfulll]

I suggest you wait until he contacts you, stop worrying, and it's perfectly normal to feel dred or thinking you guys might break up. If this happens a lot I think it's best for you guys to call it off, as hard as it may seem. Don't waste your time with someone that makes you feel sad. When their might be another guy around the block that'll make you really happy.