Can lust turn into love?

Question

I think there needs to be equal amounts of love and lust to make a relationship work. It seems like most people start out with lust and they make it work. Does the lust change into love overtime? Or was the love always there even when it was just lust?

Sensmind · Accepted Answer

I think an individual's attitude is at the heart of this - The interesting thing for me is that as you say for a lot lust plays a big part in starting relationships but say you are having your 10th Wedding Anniversary, ask yourself what made me settle down with my 3rd, 7th or 9th BF/GF - What I am getting at, was there at a subconscious level saying to you at the start "Is this someone I could fall in love with?"
To your question, I suppose so as you sate your lust, you get to know someone, I doubt there are any people who just have sex without communicating on some level apart from physical. So therefore as you get to know someone you could fall in love. The dynamic you describe of the usurping of the lust/love levels as you go through a relationship are probably by the importance to attribute to looks/personality throughout the relationship

chriscdi · Accepted Answer

when there's a relationship, lust does not exist in that relationship, i think that when 2 people are in love, their sex isn't lust but more of a way to show love, my opinion to lust turning into love, yes it is possible, I've heard it happen plenty of times with friends with benefits, people start catching feelings, if that keeps going with them both catching feelings for each other the lust can turn into love but i dont know how often it happens, usually only 1 person catches feelings for someone in this situation but i dont think its impossible.

nella965 · Accepted Answer

I think that relationships need to start with both mental attraction and lust. But if you fall in love due to the lust, it won't last. Its understandable that lust can lead to love. But there needs to be fierce strong mental attraction in order for a relationship to last for years or forever.

Sarahr123 · Accepted Answer

Nah I don’t think so because love is a feeling not a decision. Generally lust being fulfilled leads to loss of respect and viewing the person as an object who is a means to an end. We can’t fall in love with an object used for sexual gratification alone.

Jean-Marie_Céline · Answer

It really depends on how the relationship developes.

Lliam · Answer

Absolutely. The way I describe it is, a relationship usually begins with infatuation. Two people are first attracted to each other physically and probably like other things about each other, as well. I mean, I wouldn't date someone I wasn't physically attracted to. That physical attraction can be equated to lust. You would like to have sex with them. So, basically, lust comes first.
True love comes later. It builds over time once two people get to know each other very well, once they know all their quirks, flaws and bad habits and how they behave in various situations. Trust grows when they can be fully genuine and honest with each other. And trust is a major component of love.

TadCurious · Answer

I think you can definitely fall in love with a person after being just sexually attracted to them. This happens sometimes with people who are in fuck buddy or FWBs relationships when one or both individuals "catch feelings." There are biochemical reasons for that happening. Having orgasms with another person releases oxytocin, which among other things it does promotes a sense of bonding. And then are relationships that start out based on feelings and become sexual later.

MementoMori_ · Answer

I think when people are younger, it's all about lust. You can't tell if there is real love there until the lust wears off. Every relationship gets to that point at some point and most of them end up breaking apart because they discover there is nothing beyond the superficial at that point. Mature love doesn't happen in the 20s or even 30s.

crazy8000 · Answer

Right kind of love usually creates lust.
The other way around very rare and people of today usually get confused and think they love or are in love when it is just lust. they doesn't realize this until they begin to love someone for first time. the same thing usually happen with in love part for many.

Exorcist_Rampage · Answer

I'm sure it could. I often fantasize about you, miss Apple, and wonder if we were in a relationship with each other if there would be an amazing sparkle of soaring love or if it is just my carnal desires to dig into your righteous rack.

I think lust can turn into love given the right tools and events. The reverse can happen too.

Jjpayne · Answer

It can. Lust brings them in but talking brings them to love. Not to say we won't get distracted and have to be pulled out of a daydream. Aka "what huh.. right" (in head- I was busy looking at those legs, da#n they are so smooth and her eyes are amazing, they also seem to pierce right through me) :)

Bananaman177 · Answer

I think lust can seem exactly like love, especially when you want it to, and you can pretend it is for a long time until the day it all comes crashing in on you that your love was just a pretty little lie you told yourself, and you've been wasting all your time living that lie and now you have nothing to show for it.

KaiserXVI · Answer

For me, lust will only turn to love when it comes to the right person. Physical appearance is what gets you in the door to begin with. To deny that is wholly disingenuous. That being said, the love, care and personality is what keeps you in for the long run.

I_Am_Sazerac · Answer

Actually yes it can. a lot of people confuse the two, but after a certain amount of time fooling around, someone or both parties start to catch feelings because you're in a more intimate situation than normal. You're learning each other and also learning how to work with each other.

It is possible of it is mutual. If it's one sided then it's not going to end well.

Browneye57 · Answer

They're two different things. You're trying to make them the same thing - they're just not.

'Making love' is romance, sitting together, holding hands, etc.
Sex is about lust, raw, visceral, wet, orgasmic. If not, you're doing it wrong. ;)

johnieohm · Answer

lust can adapt to a physical love, like you enjoy what someone does physicallg to you. lust in itself is not true love but to people who are younger can assume that true love is lust. once they figure out what true love is they will break this mentality and start calling a want to have sex lust and true love true love

Anonymous · Answer

I don't think it can. And if people do start dating after lusting for each other, they usually end up breaking up later on. Never heard of anyone who has actually turned lust into love so I wouldn't know. You might give love a chance but if you're reason for seeing someone started with lust it most likely won't turn into you loving so much that you lust for that person but more of a lusting for someone so much that you love em. It feels more like a safe card than a true relationship I guess.

xkildy · Answer

I agree with the person below it depends on how the relationship does develop most often than not if lust comes first then the amount of chances that you will have turning it into a relationship will be slimmer

Internarchitect · Answer

Lust is a German word that means “Want”. So yes, you should always “Want” your partner. You may go days without, but eventually you will “Want” her again. How bad you want it is usually a matter of time apart.

Gstacy703 · Answer

Initially it starts with an attraction then as you get to know the person and start caring for each other and spending time together and if your personalities match in the long run it can turn into ❤️ love

locoloco68 · Answer

Percentage that turn into love and last very long I think we'd be rare but then again there is love at first sight anything can happen but majority I would say would crumble in a couple of years relationships these days don't last more than 5

Cactusqueen · Answer

I guess if we’re talking two strangers on the train or at the gym etc see one another as sexy and imagine sex together then eventually get to know who they are and love forms

normalice · Answer

If the sex is good, it can become akin to an addiction. And if the addict manages to think themselves equal to the dealer, that's a sufficient description of love.

Skadouchebag · Answer

No. What's probably really happening there is that you're lusting after someone, but then you happen to independently develop genuine love for them later as you get to know them.

cheapshotbob · Answer

if they are old enough yeah but it really doesn't turn into love if there your age its mostly a crush or a fixation which goes away when the other grown up things kick in

blutwolfe · Answer

Well you need both for sure, and I have seen it where if you start with lust you'll end up with love, but I feel love helps with lust too. Like sometimes your lust isn't that strong if you're not in love.

rjroy3 · Answer

No, but you can fall in love with someone you lust after. Lust is lust. Love is love. You can have one of them, both of them or neither of them. They don't hold the same slot

CowboyUpRight · Answer

I think the lust ties two people together long enough to grow into love, if the chemistry is there. If not, I suppose it will probably take a negative turn at some point, but at least the sex will be good...

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Yes, it can. You can initially be attracted to someone sexually, but then you find out there is a lot more to them then just that, so then you fall in love with them.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I think they are commonly mistaken for each other and also that they can follow each other but I don’t think it’s a rule

danrush · Answer

Not with u I think it's just a burning passion of hatred and anger and us guys need to let of steam so we fuck ugly girls like u so we can feel better about ourselves

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

Nope there to different things most time you have one or the other but on those rare occasions when you have both and it's being reciprocated that shit is amazing

slatyb · Answer

It ceryainly xan. As we get to know someone more deeply we can remain in list while also finding other deeper qualities we admire.

Porcelaine · Answer

Of course it can. But you need a lot more love than lust to make a relationship work.

Sophie_2301 · Answer

Of course. Love barely ever happens instantly. It starts as lust

Saarthak001 · Answer

Lust and love are not two different entities people. Its a beautiful co existence. Embrace it and enjoy it.

Morparvin · Answer

Love is an illusion and lust is real. if you are one of persons who think most of time about their future (about your children's and what you gonna teach them... etc ) you wanna to find an illusion called love

oliverofjones · Answer

The chemicals between the 2 in the brain are similar and some the same. So given enough time together yes.

Minato157 · Answer

I’m in love with my crush but I would defo bang her too. I would possibly need a paperbag for that tho.

red_knight · Answer

They aren't even the same thing... If lust comes first respect will never follow... If love came first respect comes along with it hand in hand.  That's my advice/opinion

soleil2666 · Answer

I think attraction is required - if it is just lust would not consider it enough, But a large part of attraction is character based, so in that sense...

Veronica__Sterling · Answer

Ya it can Depends on the situation and the decisions taken

JKingOff · Answer

Absolutely. That's especially true in my case. I will not develop feelings for someone unless I literally have sex with them first.

janna_jcb · Answer

i think it is possible if you start your relationship because of lust, and you spend a lot of time together you can start to love each other

kitty71 · Answer

People say no that will never happen and if it indeed happens I would like to hear some suggestions on how it can happen.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

Yeah. The key word is time. Lol lust is the first thing you feel when you see someone attractive. But love takes time and effort to cultivate.

Syrian_survivor · Answer

Love always comes first, otherwise it's a disaster unless it's a happy coincidence which is very VERY rare.

taco_truck · Answer

Yes it can because I used to sleep with this one girl for about a year but than she started to catch feelings and yeah it was very awkward...

itszee · Answer

Both need equal amount. Love without lust can make a relationship dull. While lust (sex) without love is just temporary.

Cusiousandwierd · Answer

It depends and I think it can and have seen it. However both need to have those feelings change. Like most friends with benefits relationships only 1 gets romantic feelings.

PrinceNeo · Answer

Yes but only in the circumstance where both of them like each other and get along well and the sex was the bomb diggity.

alance99 · Answer

Yes its possible lust can change into love, i have many friends with benefits developing feelings over time

Luiis18 · Answer

A relationship always starts with physical attraction but not all physical attraction turns into love. So in a nutshell, not always lust turns into love.

Crustywifi · Answer

i think it’s rare. most friends with benefits end up as awkward “we don’t talk anymore“ friends but that said sex can end up with feelings being developed.

Junen · Answer

Yes, most sexual relationships start out superficially.

Blueeyes81 · Answer

No. Lol. You ever wonder why the divorce rate is so high. Too many people mistake lust for love.

Kezzz · Answer

The founding basis of the relationship is what determines whether lust can become love

Likes2drive · Answer

I think it starts out that way with most relationships

kill_joy69 · Answer

Love and list are always there overtime lust dies and love is all that remains

derella21 · Answer

Yes, for me lust is the start of what could develop

Twalli · Answer

Lust is why you date. Love develops as you know each other better

Fuentes · Answer

Maybe but it depends on what both people are thinking wnd usually nobody is on the same page

jss123 · Answer

Definitely but there must be some connection for me too

Cleo81 · Answer

No cause then it’s just about sex when it fade it gets boring.

Can lust turn into love?

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