How do you deal with damaged women when it comes to relationships and dating? (Page 2)
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I think negative experiences are more likely to cause detachment and refrain from dating all together.
i think that whole “damaged women have lots of sex” is just propaganda attacking Women’s sexuality.
But like any other person. you learn how to deal by getting acquainted, building trust etc
Well, I’ve heard and known too many instances of women in the sex industry and women who are promiscuous who have had a one for a series of negative, troubling, or traumatic experiences which may indicate the reason why they are the way that they are in terms of being promiscuous. From what I know about my experience with women including evolutionary biology, women are much more selective when it comes to sex and don’t see it in the same way that men do. While men might prefer, favor, engage in, or incline towards a more non-committal, promiscuous, or nondiscriminatory mating, women do not.
Are there women who are in the sex industry or who are promiscuous and the reason for being in these industries or being this way is just because they are very sexual and love having sex? Yes, I’m sure there are many.
But, is this a commonality or inclination among women? No, I wouldn’t say so.
I agree with you, Miss VIVANT.
I don't. I've had a life of negative experiences, that doesn't mean I get to act shitty or not be responsible for my actions. Trying to help a damaged woman is like trying to help some one who is drowning all they do is pull you under with them. They can not be fixed by you, only they have the power to save themselves and if she isn't trying to do that with everything she has I want nothing to do with her (nothing personal but again, I don't want to be dragged into that shit storm.).
In my experience I couldn't deal with them at all. They would do very irrational things or talk negatively about themselves out of nowhere etc. And no matter what I tried to say it wouldn't help. So I think they just have to deal with it themselves, get therapy etc. But I am also not good at emotionally supporting people or dealing with emotions in general so maybe other people can help but I can't.
It depends on the woman. Be patient with her and listen to her needs. Only get involved with her if she is making efforts to heal, though. The trauma will never fully go away, but you don’t want to get involved with someone who prefers to act negatively because of their trauma.
I am someone from the other end but my behaviors were the opposite. I avoided women as much as possible because I thought my very presence would make them go insane.
I am getting better at it but I’m not really sure if I will ever get over it.
I did have an ex girlfriend who played a major part in that recovery. Just treat the “damaged” person in question just like you would anyone else, like they are human. If this damaged woman were anything like me they probably thought (wrongly, I’m sure they are aware that it is irrational but they don’t know how to stop) that all men are like the ones who gave her a bad enough time to be “damaged”. A single counterexample (the new boyfriend) would be enough to at least make her realize the fear it a little bit irrational and will hopefully make an effort to lighten up. It might help if you were able to help her get help.
Hope that helps.
either you reject them cause you don't want to bother with them either you date them but then the only things to do is to ve very patient, not overthinking the smallest stuff,, making sure the person feel safe with you and can tell you everything (good communication), never judging them and I think that's it.
Don't deal with damaged women. Would you knowingly buy a "damaged" car, or a "damaged" house?
You can't "fix" someone who is broken, they have to want to fix themself. Trying to "fix" someone will only serve to have their damage focused on you, making you the whipping post for everything bad that has happened in their life.
Find a sane, healthy, girl.
whoa. some of the guys' answers are bang on - like run away or get another one. but why are we talking specifically about women? men who exhibit those behaviours are called studs no? so why the big difference?
Well if the same thing was asked about men, women here would also be saying leave that broken man, right miss?
@Alex_988_2 i guess i would have liked the question better if it didn't seem to be only referring to broken women, but to broken people. and please don't call me miss (it sounds snarkey and i don't much appreciate it).
you didn't answer my question, ma'am
@Alex_988_2 geesh - now i'm ma'am? is this some kind of formality expression you are using? if so, then i completely understand. ok so i am trying to get across that i would have appreciated the question more if it wasn't about broken women but also included broken men. that would have been a better discussion in my mind. and i sure hope that if the question about broken people came up - then we would all be able to participate in a discussion about how to help broken people and what are the ways in which to do so. and maybe not make women feel like when they exhibit the behaviours listed - somehow they are broken but when men exhibit these behaviours they are considered cool and studs. i don't think that's fair at all. and if you have seen some of my other comments here you would know that i repeatedly try to pick up for everyone and not point fingers at only one gender.
i asked if say you were in a relationship with a damaged man, would you run away or stay and give him all the love and stuff?
and obviously you are older than me, and im a gentleman, so i called you a miss or a ma'am (idk why you felt wrong); or you expect me to call you a chick or babe that i call to my age-fellows (i dont mind that btw)?
@Alex_988_2 no - no - no about miss and ma'am... that is very respectful when it is not used in a snarkey kind of way and i appreciate that which is why i asked you if you were being formal and polite - so thank you for that? and yes of course i would stay and do everything i possibly could in order to help heal someone and i don't care if it is a guy friend, a girl friend, a boyfriend, a partner - a boss even? and no to the chick or babe - that's terrifyingly rude to say to an - oh dear me - older woman? and thank you for explaining what you meant when i asked - a sign of a true gentleman!
lol thank you.
another thing, im basically writing a book on female psychology so i want to ask few things related to that and it'd be cool if i could get some benefit from your experience.
so pm me
You can lead the horse to the water but you cannot make him drink. I know it sounds cold but it is the honest truth. If a woman is not going to help herself give up because you are wasting your time. It will just give you turmoil and cost you money. Run as far away as you can LOL especially if she is not willing to make that change.
I hate this type of shit and all these statements cause what if a woman has gone as far as she absolutely can and she has a disability or disorder that prevents more.
So she doesn’t deserve love then huh
Thanks bruh
the world of women is very complicated. it is men who make women negative. this may be her father, her first boyfriend, her uncle, her grandfather, her male teacher. but if there is a man who repairs the soul of the woman, the woman loves enough to worship that man.
What else way is to win her worshiping love..
i want to pm you for this, follow me back
I was married to one for 5yrs I would have to agree or have no option. I would be paying for some others sin if I would slightly do something wrong. I was verbally abused by my 1st but I would not take it out on her. But she started towards the end. Now I'm dealing with the fact I'm not good enough thoughts and been coming across signs that I am not. No one realizes how mental health is so important
I would never date a damaged man. Realize that when you go with a damaged person, all their troubles will now be YOUR new troubles. You will have an extra set of burden to deal with.
The question was about woman
@Alex_988_2 whats the difference between damaged man and woman? damaged goods is damaged goods.
@nelly83 Yes. Exactly. 👏👏👏
imagine if you were damaged, and people would say you are useless, how'd you feel?
@Alex_988_2 maybe you should fix yourself. My life wasn't perfect and i worked hard to set myself straight.
@bamesjond0069 i was saying that to @nelly83
@Alex_988_2 I am too smart to be damaged in the first place. You're only damaged if you associate with the wrong people. Its kinda like telling hot folks that they should always date the ugly folks because " what if they turn ugly too on day?" Its not gonna work either. Nobody likes to date someone they don't wanna look at. Life is cruel. Deal with it.
well looks can't change so your that example is void.
and person can get damaged emotionally any day of his/her life.
and i asked hypothetically, how'd you feel
@Alex_988_2
"well looks can't change so your that example is void."
Looks can change. Everyone ages.
I have no guilt rejecting damaged folks sorry. Because I am not damaged. That is my final word.
@Alex_988_2 I'm not a compassionate person. I say things like it is.
i honestly believe now (bc of our previous 3 to 4 discussions here) you must have gotten hurt real hard at some point in life and are scared to even admit.
anyway thats not my business but you still didn't answer my question. example is still void bc basic looks dont change much, but anyone can be traumatized at any point in life, and for this question just assume this case and then tell, how'd you feel if then people told you to fuck off?
(and jeez you really were and still are dumb. i had to explain it that much for you to get it)
@Alex_988_2 haha anyone can age and lose their looks at any time in life too. You lose your looks quickly fast. By the time most folks hit their mid 30s, they look like shit. Yea, it happens while you're still not that old. But does it mean that everyone LOVES dating ugly folks? NO
I don't want damaged goods. Even people with damaged goods do not want folks who are damaged goods. Ugly people do not want other ugly people either. Sounds more like you're damaged goods fending for your own self on here, knowing that you are unworthy of dating hurts you so bad.
Don't talk about me being hurt in life, if you're the one obviously in pain.
@Alex_988_2 I'm honestly sick of arguing with lowly, damaged, ugly assholes insulted cuz people like you can't get dates. You are just arguing cuz you know you're low quality. I'm not low quality and I have better things to do all day than to have worthless conversations with unworthy, insulted assholes all day.
dumbass i told you just assume that looks dont change for the sake of argument (although that's the case) and that anyone can get damaged emotionally in life (there's enough chance, but assume anyway) now how'd you feel?
you were and still are an ignorant empty headed worthless human jeez so freakin' annoying
and lol i bang a new cunt almost every weekend (these days I've exams so)
i am this person and the best way to deal with me is to not. it's not ideal for a real partnership. i dont want to speak for other girls but i know that i couldnt be like an okay girl would be
Huh, why?
because i am too independent
and say if you were damaged or broken
yes i have been damaged but i rose above it, i didn't let it destroy me, i just know that people who haven't been damaged, never needed to heal themselves, so they will look for someone to be their other half instead of realize that they were able to be whole
Ima be honest here: I’m one of these people and I have no idea how to deal with myself. Half the time I’m empty, the other half I’m thinking about suicide. It’s extremely hard to be happy in that sort of situation
Can you PM me about this
Yes it is extremely hard to deal with for both people in the relationship but can be over come if you an him are willing to put the effort it will take to make it work an fix it then you can get threw it an come out stronger for each orher
Being understand to her past and not treating her badly. I think everyone regardless of gender has had some thing happen in their past that causes damage
Avoid them like the plague. Those are huge red flags. You wouldn't accept a package that was damaged from UPS. You'd send it back for a refund. Don't accept it in your dating life, which is exponentially more important than a box from Amazon.
Quite simply, I don't. Those are red flags to me, and are generally more trouble than they're worth. When they come to light, I bail out.
I am one of those and I am not damaged I m unique from my scars. Personally I like honesty and no games. Soon as someone becomes dishonest or plays games I'm out had enough of that in my life.
I don't. I have little interaction with them. Being damaged is reasonable. I'm damaged. But I don't do drugs or sleep around. So I expect my future partner not to either, even if she is damaged.
Avoid damaged women. That kind of damage is contagious.