I'm in a relationship since 3 years but now I can't stop thinking about another boy. (He is in a relationship too.) What should I do?

[Anonymous]

An actual representation of my situation

I'm a 19 year old girl. So, my Boyfriend and I are together since 3 years. We love each other a lot. Our families also know how close we are. Everything is fine between us. Love and Lust, both are in perfect balance... like how it should be. But, recently I saw a boy and he is so fucking hot and attractive. I have seen him in person once and I have been stalking his Instagram account. He is kinda famous. He doesn't even know that I exist. But, I know almost know everything about his life because he posts everything on Instagram and also because I've some friends who know him or are friends with him. He also has a Girlfriend who he has been in a relationship since 5 or 6 months and it seems like they love each other a lot. Okay so now the problem is that I can't stop thinking about that boy. I tried to stop but I can't. I don't know how he is mentally. I mean I don't know how he behaves, talks or thinks in real life but he attracts me physically. I mean his body and looks attract me but, not the mind because I don't know him personally in real life. I love my boyfriend more than my life. I could die for him. It may sound cliche but I really would. I can neither leave him nor live without him. Then, why am I attracted to this guy? Why can't I stop thinking about this guy? Is it normal to be attracted to another person while you are already in a relationship? Am I in love with this guy or is this just attraction? Can we fall in love with someone just because of good looks or body and without knowing them in real life or never even talking to them? What should I do? How to stop thinking about this guy? Please don't say that to stop stalking him because I can't. I've tried that and I failed. I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM. Please say if this is normal? I'm so confused right now. PLEASE HELP.

[Anonymous]

Contact the guy and then sleep with him. This will teach you several things. First-you will find out how easy it is to do things like this and your boyfriend and family will be clueless. Second-you will learn that this guy who "apparently loves his GF" will quite eagerly be willing to sleep with you on the side if you promise consequence free sex. You will learn also from this that guys completely separate sex and love-they are 2 different things which sometimes but not always coincide. Third-this will serve as practice for the future. When women "act out" they have a tendency to do so sexually (men do so violently). Fourth-you are in your late teens/early 20s and this is the time you are supposed to be experimenting. Fifth-it will fuel your memories for years. These little trysts are exciting and often the best sex you'll ever have. Now go have some fun!

[Asker]

I wish... I wish this was possible but, first of all the thing is where I'm from, if a girl does consequence free sex with someone and if people came to know about it they will call her whore, slut, etc. The second thing is I can't contact this new guy because he is way out of my league and also because I'm afraid. I'm afraid that how much will I hurt my boyfriend's feelings while doing this. I feel so bad right now. I can't be so selfish. I can't hurt him.

[Avicenna]

Focus on your boyfriend. That isn't fair to him.

[Asker]

You are right. He didn't do anything bad to deserve all this. I feel like I'm so bad... so selfish for doing this.

[Avicenna]

It's not too late to fix this

[Asker]

Yes I am trying to fix this.

[Avicenna]

I wish you the best of luck

Thanks for the MHO

[AzureGirl]

You sound like you’re obsessing over a guy you found attractive. You should probably delete him off your social medias. If you can’t then get a friend to do it.

[Asker]

Yes you are right. May be this is just attraction and not love. I'm trying to stop stalking his profile and I think I should ask a friend for help.

[jimmy2]

Look the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence. Your blessings is with your man not with your lust. If you have nexflex watch The Affair. This guy through away is marrage. His family , his life when he went with his lust. I say this to say be glad it you battled this and not your man

[Asker]

Thanks for the advice and I'm definitely going to watch the Affair.

[jimmy2]

Very welcome no one wins in that situation.

[Shah11]

Your relationship expiry dates are near. You just bored with your boyfriend. You go talk to new guy

[Asker]

I don't know if I am bored with my boyfriend or not because I can't live a day without talking with him or meeting him. And there's no way I can talk to the new guy because he's "out of my league".

[Shah11]

When you start get happy with other guy that's the time you should rethink about your relationship...

[Asker]

I'm attracted to this new guy. But, I'm not happy with this situation. I don't want to leave my boyfriend or break his heart. I don't want to end my relationship with him.

[Shah11]

You're not happy with situation but you want him. Lol babygirl you're done with your relationship

[Asker]

Right now I just want to stop thinking about that new guy.

[Shah11]

But you can't babygirl

[Asker]

I will

[Shah11]

Wow so loyal to your boyfriend