Are these signs that my boyfriend is abusive?

[Anonymous]

I love my boyfriend dearly. He is such a wonderful boyfriend always doing really sweet and romantic things for me, he always has my best interests at heart. He supports me in my efforts to becoming a comic artist and is always finding new ways to help get me in the direction I need to go to get there.

However there is a side of him that is starting to surface that I am just now seeing. He hits me a lot playfully and since he is a guy of course he may not be aware of his strength. But I will tell him that it hurt what he did and he apologizes and say that he never means to hurt me. But he will do it again some time later on, I would at times tell him he's a bully because he hits me really hard some times. He got really upset and would say he never wants to hurt me. He bit me one time, but playfully, but it really hurt. He knew this because I actually cried out in pain. He laughed and asked me not to be angry with him for doing it.

He at times pressures me into having sex with him as well. He asks me if I'm into these strange sexual activities and when I say no he just says he was joking about the whole thing. He tries to pressure me to do things that I wouldn't like to do. For instance he literally backed me into a wall and made me agree to trying eel just for HIM. Even though I specifically told him I didn't want to try it because it reminds of me snakes which I don't like.

He TELLS me things to do, he doesn't ask. Which is really starting to annoy me. He is extremely jealous and will get very angry if I look at another guy. He doesn't want me to have any male friends.

He even told me just a few days ago that he is jealous of me! He feels that he is inferior to me because I am really good at artistic and creative things.

I want to know are these signs of an abusive relationship?

Also he was abused as a child, and he has a very bad temper.

[Anonymous]

Not yet, but he definitely has the potential.

I would classify it at the moment, as being that he's aggressive, and overly forceful and dominant. Some girls actually like that.

You're doing absolutely the right thing by not taking it quietly.

My suspicion is, that if you had just kept quiet and taken it, he would have escalated his physicality by now.

It's probably not a good idea to stay with him. But if you do want to stay with him, he probably needs some help.

[l-hedoniste]

I wouldn't call it an abusive relationship YET, but there are enough Big Red Flags--lots of nonconsensual behaviour, broad contempt for your opinion, maybe a bit of unprocessed rage--for you to put this relationship on probation while decides whether he wishes to become ready for you.

[spartanqueen26]

I have been through a domestic violent relationship before so I am going to help here I are two links link

link

P.S. if he is anything like what is in these links you need to leave him ASAP its no joke :(

I hope I was able to help you!

[nomore]

All what you are saying sounds alarming, Have you tried talking these issues through with him?

[Armada]

I don't suggest that. I think she needs to GET OUT OF THERE. This guy is clearly is a psychopath and the QA even knows it. If she didn't suspect he was then she wouldn't have even asked this question. Get out of there. If he knows where you live, get a 20ga shotgun. 12ga if you can handle the recoil.

[Armada]

He sounds mentally unstable. GTFO of there before he seriously hurts you. He acts nice to you to keep you from running. Don't fall for his sh*t. He will only get more abusive knowing he's gotten away with what he has already done.

[Asker]

He told me once before that if I left him he would kill me, but he said he was joking. The scarey thing about it is that he looked so seious when he said it. It scared me so much...

[Armada]

You honestly sound like you already know what you need to do. Leave him. Today. He sounds like a god damn psycho. Pack some heat too. Your life is definitely worth more than the 300 dollars it takes to buy a shotgun. I've read too many stories of crazy ex-boyfriends breaking into the ex-girlfriend's house and murdering everyone. Call me paranoid/crazy but I think you're better safe than sorry, especially you women.

[Longshot]

It's no secret that abused children can grow upto be abusers themselves. Either you get out or tell him he needs therapy. Don't fall into the trap of thinking it will get better. Without help, it won't.