Should I break up with my boyfriend if I am attracted or falling to someone else?

[Anonymous]

Recently, my boyfriend and I got some issues. I tried my best to resolve the issues but it always end up happening again. We love each other so much but we have different perspectives and views.

I met this guy who always approaches me. He makes me smile. He makes me feel special. Now, I feel like I am drawn to him. I keep thinking about him day and night.

I don't want to cheat on my current boyfriend. Do you think it's better to break up with him?

[caring__1]

It sounds like you're not ready to commit and settle down. There is no problem acknowledging that, but never move on before ending what you have. When people are truly committed, they do all in their power to address and resolve issues. Only if they find these issues to be unresolvable do they end the relationship and move on. I can't say whether you've addressed issues or are quick to jump ship or just not ready to settle down, but learn from your experience for future situations.

[Asker]

Thank you for that. I tried my best to resolve the issues we have. It's just I guess we are incompatible at many points. We love each other too much but it ends up being toxic when we're together. I think we will grow more if we are apart at this time. The fact that I am crushing on someone confuses my mind. I feel bad for feeling that too, I believe it's gonna be unfair for my boyfriend. The fact that we are in a long distance relationship, I believe both of us deserves better.

[caring__1]

It is possible to love someone we are incompatible with. Your acknowledging that is a positive step. Putting off talking to your boyfriend about your feelings won't make it easier and can make it more complicated. Let him know you want both of you to be happy and feel it is more likely if you each seek out different partners. Share with him the specific positives you have seen and appreciated in him, but also let him know the areas where you're heading in different directions. Best wishes that the next step you take shows progress.

[virgin20]

If you aren't happy in your current relationship of think this guy is a better match, break up so you don't chest.
Its bad to be dumped, but I'd rather that than find out a girl is cheating on me.
But it's a risk worth taking if you feel like he's a better match

[Asker]

I just feel numb right now with our relationship. I got tired of exerting too much effort and giving my all. Now I feel bad that I am feeling something on another guy. I don't want to cheat and hurt him more. I think breaking up would be fair enough.

[virgin20]

I wouldn't blame yourself. Shit happens. You get on with it.
Just at least break up if you aren't feeling it with him anymore! Maybe you don't want to totally commit to anything yet !
Good luck

[Dazed0N0Confused]

First, good on you for not cheating.
Second, you shouldn't move on until you are out of the current relationship. But a few questions for you:
Are you feeling this way because your current relationship is hitting a few speed bumps or are the issues serious?
Is the one approaching you interested in a relationship or just to fuck?
Are you willing to breakup with someone and IMMEDIATELY jump into a new relationship even though you haven't reflected on why THIS relationship failed?
Have you spoken to your current SO about how you're feeling and given him a chance to resolve and fix things?

You're going to do what's best for you, but just because a guy approaches you, doesn't mean he wants a relationship... Good luck

[Asker]

Thank you. Those questions helped me to rationally evaluate what I am feeling right now not just for my relationship's issues but also for what might happen with me and the new guy. Right now, I am in the process of discussing the problems with my boyfriend. He is eager to resolve the issues but for me it's quite to late. I don't feel anything anymore. I don't want to be unfair with him. As for the new guy, I'm not sure where it'll go. He's giving me signs that he likes me but is not making any moves yet.

[CurLyF]

Ok first kudos on not wanting to cheat, not many people frown upon that and it's awful. Now, it's a gamble. Only you know how you feel with your boyfriend and if you still believe the relationship si worth fighting for. There's always going to be ups and downs. And if you break up and get together with this new guy, eventually you'll have problems too. What matters is how you handle those problems and that both parties are intrested in overcoming said problems, can't be just one trying to carry the relationship. So you need to meditate if yo want to try with this new guy, which might end in a week or 10 years, you don't know. Or you want to fight for your current boyfriend. Honestly I don't see as a very good sign that you are that atracted to another guy and might be considering breaking up for him. Might already have your awnser right there, if you were still deeply in love with your boyfriend, even if you were having problems, you wouldn't be considering it.

[Asker]

Thank you for your helpful advice. I guess I need more time to meditate and reflect on what I am feeling right now. I did my best on fighting for my current relationship, it's just I grew tired on fighting for it. I know he loves me too, but we're just in different page. Our views differ so much that we end up hurting ourselves. I want him to be happy too and for the infatuation I am feeling for the new guy, I dont want to be unfair with my boyfriend. Im trying my best to resist what I am feeling for the new guy. But the more I resist, the more I think about the new guy.

[CurLyF]

We are always taught in movies that love is the only thing needed to make something work, but sadly that's not true. The basic ingredient is love for one another, but you also need timing and for both to have equal ammounts of will to work on the relationship, meet in the middle ground and compromise. My advice is to try to forget about the other guy for a moment and just focus on wether you want to stay with your boyfriend or not. You shouldn't be breaking up FOR the new guy, to be with him, but rather break up for YOU, because you don't want to be in a slow death relationship hurting one another and loosing time of your life. Focus on that. If you decide to break up, let it be for your wellbeing and even his, and just see it as a bonus that you get to date the new guy. But if you decide to keep fighting, then tell the new guy the truth, if you are really invested in fighting for your relationship he needs to know the real reason so you don't become a spot of insecurity in his life. Good luck! :)

[Anonymous]

No just be a whore

[Asker]

Lol, I wish it's that easy😁

[Opinion Owner]

Fix the issues you have and stay with boyfriend. Stop crushing on different guys for peaks sate.