Should you love your partner more than your parents?

[coachTanthony]

yes

no

see poll ( I don't know but I love you Coach )

[TruthBringer]

Parents. Without a doubt.

It's not the same type of love, so there is no comparison between the two, to begin with. But I gues your question is in a way that having to choose between both, which one we would pick.

In my case, if I really have to choose between my parents and my partner, I would pick my parents without hestitation. You cannot replace your parents, but you can replace your partner. Even though I'm standing on my own two legs, I'm not going to betray the two most important people in my life whom I can thank for being able to stand on my own two legs. I know people, including family members, who distanced themselves from their parents because of their wives and let me tell you something, they couldn't be any more miserable. I know that my parents will never abandon me, while I cannot give the same guarantee that my girlfriend or wife wouldn't leave me one day.

Perhaps other people feel differently because they weren't blessed to have supporting or loving parents, or for whatever reason, but to each their own I guess... The only thing I would give priority over my parents are my kids (if I had any).

[markayd]

you had warm loving caring parents? so how did you turn out to be such a nasty bully with a terrible personality? we all know you , you're pretty popular for having a nasty attitude on here.

[TruthBringer]

@markayd Nasty bully? Funny, I never bully except sating some hard facts. The fact I managed to trigger you says more than enough. Ciao little nasty girl

[TruthBringer]

Your ad hominems are a testament to the weak arguments your brain can produce.

[OlderAndWiser]

In you love your parents and your partner unconditionally, that is not something that you can quantify or compare. And if your parents and partner both love you, then you should never be in a position in which you must choose between one or the other.

[markayd]

My father worked 2 jobs to send me to college, he starved so that I could have a better future , my father pushed in a stroller to school for 10 miles everyday when I was 6 years old. My father worked as a cook , stood 9 hours a day cooking in the hot kitchens , making minimum wage. Just so he could support the family and raise us well. When there was one more slice of pizza left , he always gave the last slice for me rather than eat it himself. During my emotional wreck teen years , I lashed out at him, screamed every curse word that existed on earth at him. He still didn’t give up on loving and caring for me. He has tolerated so much of my bullshit for so long and did so much for me For 20+ years. he still loves me despite all the headache I had given him. He never gave up on me despite my failures and disobedience

Now this new guy who emerged in my life for a few years , had done anything for me, never sacrificed anything for me, Now wants me to love him more than my parents? It would be really selfish and self serving for me to do so.

[Iron_Man]

This is so awesome thank you for that

[markayd]

@Iron_Man

many people act as if I were unreasonable to say that I will always value my parents more than my husband. But if you take a took at the reason why, it becomes obvious. But it won't mean that i won't love my husband. I would love him very much too but when it comes to appreciation and worship , my parents would definitely win on that one.

I would put more effort in maintaining my relationship with my husband than my parents because I still have the rest of my life ahead of me (with my husband). My parents won't be here much longer. I would definitely spend time with my parents before they pass away though.

[markayd]

@Iron_Man

A better way for a husband to understand it is "your wife won't be here today , if it weren't for her parents who worked so hard to raise her into the decent, successful adult"

[Iron_Man]

No matter what the parents are always number one even in death you’ll see them again in heaven

[Iron_Man]

I do appreciate your comment

[Breanna_nonbinary]

That’s a really stupid question. Sorry for being blunt, but do you live your partner in the same way you love your parents?
Alfred all you have sex with your partner and not your parents.
Love is not definable in words, and is different for everyone, therefore the way you love a partner is different than the way you love your siblings or children, or friends etc. The way you love your partner will be different than the way you love next partner. Each time you’ll recognize it as love but each time will be different.
As for “more”, don’t be ridiculous. I hate Valentine’s Day. If You don’t get my partner a bigger gift than last year's then you think they don’t love you as much.
I prove I love my partner everyday. I do this by saying it and treating her like an equal.
Don’t let social media and superficial sources define how you should love or how it should be displayed.

[TheorionMage]

Once at the end of college, I was pretty serious about a young woman and my mother had come up to PSU for the ceremony and a group dinner. Now BOTH she and the girlfriend were Scorpios. Mom threw a hissy-fit because I wanted my 'steady' to come along to dinner. Whining "but I'M your Mother!" I explained to her the facts-of-life. "YOU & the family ARE my 'present & Past'... SHE IS my 'present' and 'possible FUTURE' ... IF YOU would LIKE to continue into MY future, on THIS 'my day' ... CUT your CRAP!"

She'd expected to be "the Queen of the Day" and was sorely disappointed that everyone wasn't kissing Mom's ass at MY Graduation! She got a 'reality check' ~ I'm told Mom pouted the entire hour & half drive home.

Dad & I am BOTH Libra's and my Mom and my Girlfriend were BOTH Scorpios (Mom's a DOUBLE-Scorpio!) and Libras are drawn to romance Scorpios.

[DizzyDesii]

A real man 🙌👏

[TheorionMage]

@DizzyDesii There's that classic mantra:
"If you aren't paying me or laying me... you're entitled to YOUR opinion but not to dictate mine"
Obviously my Libra father sown his DNA in his Scorpio/my Mom... as she was Scorpio mercurial whatever they had was THEIR business... SOMETIMES becoming 'estranged' from family & drama is the most health choice available to you.
I HAVE made mistakes BUT... at least they were MY mistakes
having learned by observation, to step aside of THEIR choices
is called "contextual insightfulness" ;)

[MysteriousDarkness]

Love is complex. A mix of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs associated with strong feelings of affection, protectiveness, warmth, and respect for another person. Love can also be used to apply to non-human animals, to principles, and to religious beliefs

A relationship is composed of friendship, sexual attraction, intellectual compatibility, and, of course, love. Love is the glue that keeps a relationship strong and solid. It is deeply biological. ... However, love can be summarized as an intense feeling of euphoria and deep affection for someone or something.

The Parent-Child Relationship is one that nurtures the physical, emotional and social development of the child. This relationship lays the foundation for the child's personality, life choices and overall behaviour.
There are times your parents should come first and times your spouse should come first.

[dustybiker]

Family is incredibly important. It isn’t a percentage thing. You do everything in your power to make time for “supportive family”, because we all have those that fit outside the lines. Family are who have your back when life backs us into a corner.”, and you need to be the one that has theirs.

[Anonymous]

Not more. But you should make your family a main priority. And you parents can’t control your life after you leave the nest. They just need to love you unconditionally and be loved by you. Now the only thing I think is morally wrong is to put your parents in a nursing home because your partner doesn’t want to offer help for them in old age. In that instance I think the partner needs to understand the importance of caring for your elderly family and not ask you to choose them. But in every other case I think usually you should prioritize your marriage

[hahahmm]

As your partner earns your trust in a deep serious relationship, they will start moving towards the top over time. If you're getting engaged/married they should already be at the top. That said... if your spouse is unfair to your parents you can't support them in that. Same for if your spouse wants to treat their own parents better than yours. **Unless** your parents have been scumbags... then it's understandable. The point is to be fair.

[NewgodX]

No
Your mother gave you birth, your wife didn't gave your birth
Your first responsibility is your mother,
Love your wife obviously there is no big deal about it but if it comes to choosing one out of two then I would have chose my mother

I lost my parents when I was not 18 and my marriage only lasted less than 3 months

[DonkeyDan]

Personally I'd say yes, but then I don't have a good relationship with my parents, but regardless of that I think the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with should be more significant to you than your parents, as they are now directly involved with the decision making of the rest of your life, and the one person that should come first to you.

[NathanDavis]

my parents would scold me if I loved them more than I loved my wife, my own family... especially my mother... JONATHAN SANTIAGO... my father would just shake his head like he usually would... lol

but I do agree 1000% with @little_rose 's opinion

[Nomina]

My mother would win hands down, everytime. She's the only person I can say without a shadow of a doubt, that I can die for.

Any partner would have a lot of catching up to do.

[DizzyDesii]

Yes. You parents had their turn. You can still honor them and love em but you need to leave em and enter the next chapter in life

[pickedcrisps]

Yes. Especially if it's the kind of love that's so intense and so raw and unlikely to ever fade. Rare but there's a tiny tiny amount of couples who are that madly in love and for life 😃😃😍😍😍

[Anonymous]

I don’t ever love a partner more then my parents my parents are the ones who gave me life and they are the ones who have been there from the day I was born and they sacrificed things for me

[t-8900]

You need to make your SO your top priority. But it's a different kind of love.

[Anonymous]

No. The love for your parents should be incomparable. It’s a different type of love. The love for your partner is deeper and different but should be higher or lower than you parents love. They should be equal in a way.

[Opinion Owner]

Shouldn’t be *

[penneva581]

I dunno. I mean your parents have known you your entire life

[Simply_M3]

I would say that the love for a partner and your parents are completely different lol. You should have enough love in your heart for multiple people, which includes parents, friends, spouse, and maybe even children!!!

[ChiTown33]

Yes! As I've said before a man has 2 great loves in his life. The first is his momma. The second is the woman that becomes his wife. And when she comes along his momma becomes the #2 woman in his life.
That is simply the way it HAS to be.

[Alyssa11]

I think you should have a different type of affection towards your partner and your parents lol. Having said that, who you choose to trust more etc depends on your situation and the kind of relationship and upbringing you had.

[gabriela13]

I guess it depends on your situation.

Married and adult should be more in love with your spouse than parent but only in wanting/needing to be around kind of love not that you don't love your parents anymore

[karaspara]

Depends what your relationship with your parents was/is like