Could you forgive someone who cheated on you and continue the relationship?

Question

Diodoro · Accepted Answer

Physical cheating No.
Emotional cheating Yes

Sex is a different level of emotions for women so when they do it then things are pretty much done and even if you take her back she's lost respect for you as a man.

Because she did that and received no punishment of any kind. Likely she won't be in the dog house for having done it because you're trying to mend things. But now you're a weaker version of the man she used to love in her eyes so it's coming from a different place.

Or you do put her in the dog house and because she doesn't want to face consequences she'll feel like you guys should just break up or she cheats again because she doesn't feel the same way for you and the relationship as it is

Girls who take full accountability for their own actions and work to make amends is actually a very high value, rare trait to find in a woman. And that is a girl that is likely worth holding onto. But in the same breath, that type of girl is also highly highly highly unlikely to ever physically cheat on you

Idontwantausername1 · Accepted Answer

Everyone be saying no now, but when it happens to you out of nowhere and you are very much in love the situation might change for some. That's because love makes blind and if the cheater for example really regrets it and tries to do everything to make up for it I think there can be forgiveness. I'm not saying it's good or bad to forgive someone. I do think you should not judge someone about forgiving a cheater, because that's their decision. It is still possible that the relationship works out, but I do think the change of the relationship working out in the long run really decreases.

petitedollbabee · Accepted Answer

I tried. My ex whom I lived with for a year cheated on me two days into our relationship. I was dumb and forgave him, excused it and thought “maybe he’s just not used to being in a relationship yet” and carried on. 6 months later he does it again with the same woman, sneaks off early hours of the morning and comes back smelling of sex and another woman’s perfume. Due to me living in a rental with him and us having a lease together, I couldn’t leave straight away without having to continue paying my share of our rent, so I pretended I didn’t know until our lease finished and then packed up all my stuff when he was at work and moved away. He called me when he finished work asking where I was, I blew up at him and told him I knew what he did, he made all these excuses and kept changing his story as to what he did, so told him to keep his lies to himself and never contact me again.

I learnt a valuable lesson in that relationship. Cheaters don’t deserve my forgiveness.

aWes0MeNeSs · Accepted Answer

No. All trust would be broken, and as far as I'm concerned, they don't really love or respect me if they cheated on me.

I would eventually forgive for my sake (as in not hanging onto the anger forever), but would never continue the relationship or reconsider.

SecretsofKB · Answer

Absolutely not. I've been cheated on before. That feeling after finding out is something I'll never forget.  There is no way to fix that feeling.

Desconhecida · Answer

Never. Just to be clear, I wrote NEVER! 😡

Finchie40 · Answer

You can forgive someone from cheating on you but you will never forget , If the non cheater agrees to take the cheater back they will live a life knowing that they were never fully loved by their partner and eventually resent them for their actions , even if the cheater never cheated on them again and kissed their partners ass saying it was a mistake and they change their ways to prove to the non cheater that they love them the non cheater will not have the same feelings for them and would probably go and cheat themselves , Why it’s best to move on from someone that cheats on you , And best for a cheater to move on as well , they will never experience true love living with guilt and no trust , it’s wasted time to take someone back that truly doesn’t value you

Novacane · Answer

I don’t think I ever could. I allow a lot of things in a relationship to happen, but cheating is one of those things were there is no going back on, once you cheat you have officially left my heart and mind, practically dead to me. One of the most disrespectful thing to do to your partner. Now could I forgive? Of course I don’t like to hold grudge on people, everyone make mistakes, it happens, but the relationship will not continue, we could be cool, maybe friends MAYBE, but the relationship ship has sailed already.

Shortman70 · Answer

Do you mean they continued the relationship with the lover after being caught?

Absolutely not!! They've already disrespected you tremendously and their continuing the same behavior. There's a point you go from victim to volunteer.

If it's a one time thing, that's between those 2 people. I've seen some couples survive those circumstances, I've also seen couples try and fail so bad that they could never speak to each other civilly again.

Personally I hope I never have to find out, I have no idea how I would handle it.

princessxx2 · Answer

Mine is long distance. So he cheated many times and i broke up 4 times and had sex too. The only difference is that he never broke up and i broke up. He always came back. So sex is like a drug, like hunger. Have it, tummy full ok done. Lol. Love is forever and sex is temporary. So as an anarchist, i may dismiss the definition of cheating if both do it it gets null and void coz we both were sexually deprived ( his two jobs and mine one job and MBA together). But if it was not long distance, i would've broken up haha.

Anonymous · Answer

My wife told me she slept with her
coworker On a business trip out of state.

I wasant as upset, because she told me about it and i could tell felt horrible.
I never would have found out he was banging my wife unless she told me.

I told her I wasant happy about it and i forgave her, She doesn't work there anymore,
And we have gotten a lot closer to eachother since that.

If she can tell me that, She can come to me with anything and everything.
I feel like i can trust her, And she trust me.

I wouldn’t call it quits even if she was having sex with other men,
For our kids,

Id live with it if she continued to sleep around. Id do it for the kids

but im 99.9% sure it was a 1 time thing, and it won't happen again.

Dad72 · Answer

Depends on how I found out, the extent of the cheating, and what efforts they voluntarily made to fix the relationship. Feeling bad isn't enough, they need to take action to change. Don't come to me asking every thing they should do about, a lot of what has to happen is common knowledge. If it's an affair with a co-worker, one or the other has to quit permanently. All contact with to he other to person has to stop completely. If they lie about, and minimalize what they did, it's over. If they want to keep their side piece in their life, it's over. If I find out it's still going on after they said they stopped, it's over.

TruthBringer · Answer

Only cuckold weak ass people would take back a cheating partner. Goes to show how little self-worth and self-esteem you have. It also screams that someone has a scarcity mindset. There is no relationship. Once the core foundation of a monogamous relationship has been destroyed, there is nothing left. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

sage2021 · Answer

I had a neighbor ylthat found out her husband was cheating on her. She ended up stabbing him to death and she's in prison now. Sometimes when it comes to love, cheating can really do a number on the one that was cheated on. It can drive a person to craziness what ch is what I think happened to her.

jaybee281 · Answer

Yes - And after I forgive her you know what happens? We're gonna be having sex - and while having sex I'm gonna fuck her as hard as godly possible - definitely not giving half a shit about her comfort let alone her pleasure - then suddenly pull out look at her tell her I'm done and leave without saying any other word and cut all contact forever - Now that's how I forgive people

humpbackjack · Answer

Yes I could if they were honest and I went and did the same or at least they know I have the option to do the same that way you’re even and can start fresh but if they sneak and when called out on it they just lie this means they’ll do it again and they’re just selfish and don’t care about your feelings

Kitty_V · Answer

I would evaluate our relationship maybe we have outgrown each other and should move on separately or we could consider an open relationship. I feel like if one person is at the cheating phase, how could the other person be blissfully happy, that would be unusual.

Staximus · Answer

Hell no. That means they don't give a shit about you. Find somebody who actually cares enough to treat you right. Some people say "what about open relationships?" If you agree to have an open relationship and each of you can fuck whoever you want, then what's the point of even having a relationship?

katiesmuff · Answer

That would be a big NO! It is the one thing for me where there is no changing my mind. If he thought just for an instant of me to stick his penis in some other persons mouth or pussy he would be gone. Over the years several boyfriends found that out!

AviatorTom · Answer

We all make mistakes. If it was a on-time cheat, and she wants to continue our relationship, I'd forgive her on continue our relationship. I wouldn't forget though, and if she cheated again, it's likely that our relationship would end.

otaku_owl_91 · Answer

No, but let me establish this first: men and women cheat for different reasons. Men cheat to simply cheat (or their current lover's head is trash). Women cheat because either they're not being satisfied sexually or they've lost respect for their lover. You can still love someone and lack respect for them, but without respect, women will find other men more interesting, which is lust.

slatyb · Answer

Good question. I would rather they just tell me if something is bothering them, or if they are just attracted to someone else. I could handle either. If they want an open relationship we could talk about it. Lying is the worst.

MemeSupreme · Answer

i'm not gonna stay in the relationship because he failed to communicate with me on something major like that. if like he was struggling with a high sex drive pretty badly, then we can talk about having an open relationship and boundaries with that.

Adam1978 · Answer

No you can't cheat by accident by my rulebook. I am not one of those people who think looking or thinking about a person is cheating after all. So if they oversteps the boundaries they need to go. The relationship is over.

laurieluvsit · Answer

Once cheated on all trust is lost. A relationship without trust is of no value.

Anonymous · Answer

Nope.
My wife of 10 years had a 6 month affair.
I went back for the kids but secretly hate her for what she did, the lies, the deceit, the disgusting fornication with another dude, she is literally tainted trash now and I don’t trust anything she says.
I will eventually find someone else and toss her.

BeenThereLovedIt · Answer

They already ruined it, it's most likely going to end anyways. Just pull the plug and pronounce the relationship dead. Hopefully the idiot will learn from it and never do it again.

Leonharted · Answer

No, I couldn't. I'm a pretty trusting guy until I'm given a reason to not trust someone. Once that happens, it's gone, and it isn't coming back, especially on such a huge betrayal.

Mango-man · Answer

Forgive? Maybe. Forget? Never! Divorce/break up? Most probably. Cheating on one's partner isn't something one does unintentionally - it requires active effort.

jessicake · Answer

Absolutely not. As someone in a monogamous relationship who has set up clear boundaries with my partner, if those are disrespected, that’s it for me. Don’t care if they beg or try to win me back.

Agape93 · Answer

Not a chance in any hell.  You put my life and health at risk, you betray my trust and you violate my boundaries. You'll be lucky to get away with your teeth intact

Kate090 · Answer

I would forgive for my own sake so I won’t be bitter about it , but no I would NOT continue the relationship after that.

somesoul · Answer

I forgave him because it's long distance. If in person he would have cheated, i would be long gone but if he marries me , I'd come back :)

Flower7 · Answer

Nope! I’d never look at him the same again. I’d always question where he was when we were apart and that would be a very stressful feeling.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

I could forgive them, but I definitely wouldn't stay. Doing that only encourages the cheater to do it again because you show lack of self respect.

kiki0101 · Answer

You can forgive but never forget. The trust is gone. Once there is no trust, its better to leave the relationship.

WhereIsMyMind · Answer

I couldn't do it, I know that I'd have moments where the fury would come straight back out and arguments would happen. Too much resentment.

Moose304 · Answer

Forgiveness is not the issue. The primary problem is the loss of trust. Who can you carry on a relationship with someone when you can no longer trust them?

the29thhuman · Answer

Could I again? No.
Would i the first time if I had no idea 🤷‍♀️
Yeup.
It’s up to us how we allow ourselves to receive life lessons.

What message are you giving to your future self, if you forgive someone who hurt you?

CaptainLegal · Answer

Probably never, depending on the situation though I might forgive. My ex cheated on me with a girl, turned out that she prefered girls more instead, I couldn't be that mad at her, so I forgave her and moved on, although we are good friends now

dustybiker · Answer

They gave themselves permission to cheat on you. They already chose someone else.

Anonymous · Answer

I do not forget, i do not forgive. Th dude gets an ass whooping if i find out he knew she was with someone. I also leak rhe info to all the people who know her. Karma is a real b*tch and ill make an example out if her

admles · Answer

Not even a little bit. You cheat, we're over. No excuses, no second chances, we are done.

Heartache0405 · Answer

Hell fucking no. Who the fuck would do that? Once a cheater always a cheater. Why torture yourself

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

So far I have been unable to, my heart says yes forgive but my brain says, they'll do it again.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Forgive and then tell em gtfo before i do something they’ll never forget

PinkMichae · Answer

I did and 3 years later he cheated again.  First time shame on him. Second time shame on me.

anniisa97 · Answer

I could forgive after the some but I would never continue the relationship

expdude · Answer

Appears guys are more forgiveing. Yes, I could also and have.

taylorallen · Answer

No? Once a cheater always a cheater. Once a _____ always a ______.

Alyssa_11 · Answer

I dont judge anyone who does but I can't. I tried to forgive once but I couldn't continue the relationship.

acooke-13 · Answer

I can forgive, eventually, but not continue the relationship.

AncientWisdom · Answer

Nope no trust no relationship and caught cheaters get sneakier.

FlyMulatto · Answer

Yes I could if I was in love w that person, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. The real question is, is that person willing to grow through those mistakes, and elevate as a person/partner?

Slartybartfast · Answer

If I hadn't I'd still be a virgin and would never have been married.

Miristheiss · Answer

I would break (divorce).  There is zero chance the relationship would continue.

kevinMcD · Answer

Yes. I already have. My wife of many decades cheated on me with my underage teenage daughter's boyfriend many years ago. I caught them in the car with a 6-pack and box of condoms. It's taken years to overcome.

VikingWarLord · Answer

Monogamy ain't natural  Read the book "SEX AT DAWN" by Cacilda Jetha and Christopher Ryan

bgreek · Answer

Why would i forgive someone for cheating? The trust is gone, gone I would dump them and move on

Tonita91996 · Answer

The stuff happens all the time it is not like you can do anything about it. I don't understand people overreact when people do cheat. It is what it is people don't care.

Fireguy17 · Answer

nope, never, I would not let the door hit me on the ass on the way out.

sheikalana · Answer

I could forgive but I don't think we could be in a relationship anymore.

Luopio27 · Answer

Easier said than done. Reöationships and their qualty varies so much from a million different variables.

kamalravi25 · Answer

i will forgive her but not be in relationship with her anymore.

Could you forgive someone who cheated on you and continue the relationship?

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Could you forgive someone who cheated on you and continue the relationship?

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