Fear of telling your boyfriend you’re pregnant?

[StormMistress]

Ok hypothetical here I’m not pregnant atm but I’m kind of worried how my partner would react if I was and how I’d deal with that. He is great but he is definitely not ready for a baby atm and I’d seriously think he’d leave me if something happened by accident.

What is the best solution to this? If such a thing happened? I don’t want to loose him.

[D_Bone_Steak]

Birth control was 2nd wave feminism right? Maybe it was 3rd... I don't know. But that wave makes sense to me just because babies are a shit storm of effort. The reasons a Boomer could raise like 5 kids at once does not exist anymore. Like I'd bet money literally none of you own your first home and that shit was like teenager shit to them.

A solution to your issue is beyond me. I've had 3 kids and it sucked. My 11 year old is the last to grow up right now and I just can't wait for it to finally fucking end. I've been turned into a Grandpa now though and that curse is a constant stress. I almost had to open the door today to my son, his girl, and a screeching baby because they cannot sort their own lives out. That's 3 extra mouths and none of those fuckers can hold down a fast food job for very long. They fight with each other and it's just like WTF, stop smoking weed at least until things are good!

Yeah I can't come up with a solution for someone in our current timeline... sorry. You kids do dabs, have issues that will never be delt with because cellphone time is so important and damn... no time to just go outside and touch some grass.

On top of all of that our society has become extremely gynocyntric. You're dude might be at least a little aware of that and know his life is basically owned by you and the government if a kid happens. That child support will get paid and if doesn't work his ass off and basically live in his car or work a 80+ hour job, he'll just get thrown in the slammer and probably never make it out. As a dude... fuck that shit. Even if everything goes perfect and your chick actually loves you for life... you just shit on tons of cellphone and video game time so that you can constanty come up with things to eat for a kid. That kid is going to get older, and want their own cellphone. It's a fucking shit show.

[EmbraceThePain]

Have safer sex, it’s really not that hard.
If you absolutely cannot stand the feeling of a condom, yet, you’re afraid of possibly getting pregnant and stressing out over whatever issues that may bring, whether emotionally, physically, or mentally then you will have to personally find some balance in all of that. Also, choosing someone that you know you want to marry and/or have a child with is very important. For me, I can’t imagine choosing someone who I know doesn’t want a child, house, family, or to get married. I choose based on all of those things because that is my end goal. After you become boyfriend and girlfriend, then what next? Will you two be forever just girlfriend and boyfriend? To me, it seems there’s a next step and that is to get married and then have children, although these two don’t have to be in any specific order, but the important thing is that they happen and that they are part of the overall process to further your love and relationship with the person.

[letuswaltzforthedead]

Honestly, I haven't really seen any guy react negatively to something like that. Normally the guys who react like to their s/o being pregnant tend to be pretty toxic from the start. Personally, I understand the fear. I would definitely be nervous if I had to tell anyone about my pregnancy.

[dustybiker]

If you have sex that is always a possibility. Just tell them.

[loveslongnails]

And how exactly is this "accident" going to happen? "Accidental pregnancies" are really extremely rare, however, "stupid pregnancies" occur all the time.

If you're afraid he's going to leave you if you get pregnant, you should think about not having sex with him. You need to know where a guy stands, if and when, or you're going get screwed in more ways than one.

Do you want kids in your future, and if so, when? Does he, and if so, when? Or if not at all, then why are you with him if you DO want kids? I think you have more important questions to ask and answer, like immediately.

[MrOracle]

If you have any fears of telling him, you should be talking about it NOW, when it ISN'T a problem. Find out of those fears are justified while you can still do something about it. Keeping yourself in the dark by NOT talking about it is the very worst situation you can be in.

[Sixgunsound]

Are you on birth control? Is he using condom too? It’s not like you don’t own him as a slave even if he does try to run away, the family court system is everywhere. How great could a man be who wants sex from you but not a future? What is the point of dating just to date?

[mstbooblover]

I don't know you nor your boyfriend, but something similar happened for real with friends of mine. The guy always said to his girlfriend: "if you get pregnant, I'll leave you". A few years later the girl did get pregnant..., and guess what? When she told him, no man, father to be, could have been more happy than him... :0)

It's as always a matter of trust and confidence in each other.

[Sparkie460]

You just have to ask him, what would you do if I ever got pregnant. Tell him your not but you are curious. If he says he'd leave you , you have 2 choices. Get your tunes tied or leave him. No real man will ever leave a woman when she is pregnant with his child. I've been in this position and I was a man about it and did the right thing.

[Anonymous]

Talk with him about it. If you're having sex at all, he knows (unless he's really stupid lol) that it can happen, even if you are having safe sex, so say "what if I did accidently become pregnant?" If he says "I'd leave you" (which any decent guy won't, even if it's unwanted), then you can respond with "well I guess we shouldn't have sex at all then, because there's always a possibility"

[Opinion Owner]

And you're both responsible for safe sex also. Example some guys actually think/feel that "it's the woman's responsibility" and he can go raw or do whatever he wants. Umm, nope. If he does that and you get pregnant (even if you were on the pill), he's just as much to blame for it happening.

[LordOfThePines]

Speaking for myself, I would never want my partner to fear telling me such. Just tell me, it is ok. If you don't want it, I will take you to get it aborted. If you want to keep it, we will. Either I am good with as I want kids ONLY if my partner wants them.

[Guanfei]

Tell him from the beginning. If you're pregnant and he doesn't want a baby, it should be discussed immediately so you know how to deal with it.
You can't force a baby on him if he doesn't want it. And if you want to keep the baby and he doesn't, then he has the right to leave.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Don’t tell your boyfriend anything just walk up to him & hand him a jar of sauce.

[Crafteroon]

Talk with him about it. And always tell him about it if it happens, hiding it doesn't help anyone.

And if he's not ready for kids, tell him to make sure no accidents happen too.

[ObscuredBeyond]

Ask him what his family visions are. How willing he is to risk it all for a family. If he freaks out, no sex.

[pizzalovershouse]

Takes 2 to make baby if both use protection then odds are slim sense most girls using birth control has a 12% rate of not working so adding condoms helps make it 100 percent effective if get condoms new an made good

[motownplayer2000]

Communication… that’s the only thing that will help here. But ultra clear about how you feel and your fears. If he scares at the conversation then you may want to re-evaluate your partnership if you want kids in the future

[jshm2]

To be honest, if he's that much of a dickhead, and you're that on edge about him, then it's a toxic relationship to begin with.

[Waldoe]

1st use protection, 2nd discuss what he thinks you should do if the protection fails... Be Honest... if he isn't ready for a family and commitment.. ask if it would be better if you "just take care of it" and Not tell him... communication is key

[spartan55]

Try some of that body language and see how that works.

[MrCommodore]

Even if he says he isn't ready, I don't think most guys who in a long-term relationship will mind.

[exitseven]

Maybe make extra sure you have reliable birth control.

[schittywok]

You are 30 years of age. For fucks sake. Act like it.

[VV3ZZY]

Ask him. "What if I got pregnant?" "What would you do?"

[Twalli]

Don't be in such a position keep on birth control and force him to wear a condom every time.

[Jouth]

Best solution:

Just get him pregnant instead

[Anonymous]

"accident" shouldn't happen if you are at that age your profile says.

[slatyb]

The best solution? An IUD.

[BillyBalls]

Make sure you don't get pregnant!!!

[In_Trance]

If you're not ready for a baby, abstain

[msc545]

Don't mention it and use really good birth control

[Bklynbadboy12]

Best solution is talk to him now and find out

[NathanDavis]

get a better partner

[Hanrej]

Don't get pregnant.