An old high school associate of mine sent me a screenshot of my boyfriends tinder profile that she came across. I did some research and found that in order for someone’s profile to become visible to others, they have to have been active on the app within the past week or so. After about a month of inactivity, your profile stops being shown to people. We’ve been together for 10 months now and I love him. He is my first boyfriend and I want to make things work.
When I confronted him about it he claimed that it was because I’m a stripper and my job makes him feel insecure, that because of my job I’m not as intimate as I could be with him which makes his mind wander about if I have a secret lover or if i have eyes for someone else with more money etc. I try to understand but I told him about my job a month or so into us dating and asked him if he was okay with it and that if he couldn’t deal with it, I would understand and now it seems like he’s holding it over my head and using it as an excuse to cheat on me.
He apologized Multiple times and admitted that in a moment of weakness probably after one of our arguments he got on the app. He claims that he hasn’t done anything with anyone on the app but I still consider it as a precursor to cheating as he is basically presenting himself to the world as single. He’s always on me about what I wear, my job etc. but this whole time it’s been him. I try to convince him that my job is just work. I don’t do extras I don’t know what else I could do to reassure him.
What should I do? I feel so embarrassed that anyone can see it and he didn’t even think about how he made me look. I should also note that he was cheated on in his previous relationship and he expressed that it hurt him deeply so I don’t understand why he would put me through the same thing. I really want to make this relationship work but is this something that can even be salvaged? Please be respectful when replying as I genuinely want constructive criticism & advice.
