How cruel is it to use the ''I want kids and marriage'' line on women to make them stay with you?

[Anonymous]

These aren't just guys wanting to get in a girl's pants and leave. They are the types that actually can break into a woman's shell, fake a whole relationship, continue lying even after sex, even tell the woman lines such as ''I've always wanted to be a father'' or ''I want kids and marriage'' to fully convince her, make her his girlfriend and she stays stuck on a dead-end, thinking it's going to happen. He lies on purpose basically and lovebombs her as a manipulative strategy.

On a 1-10 level of cruelty, how mean and cruel would you rate them? How cruel is that... leading someone on like that for for months, or even years, continue lying, making them fall in love with you and you're happy lying to them?

[Sandeeppingping]

Psychopathic cruel, no joke worse than nazis, they did that to people they made clear they hated at least, lying manipulating someone that loves you as if like you want to possess their soul but you have no interest in being with them whatsoever, I had a close guy friend who is like that, I emphasize on the word had, he's not my friend specifically due to him doing that to a girl friend of mine

[Sandeeppingping]

I say it's that cruel because that person removes YEARS literally years out of a person's life for absolutely nothing, it's insane to me

[Vesuvius87]

Indeed. Years got taken away from me by a sociopathic narcissists. He wasn't just after sex. He actually went beyond that. I'd rather have a man ghost me after having sex and not hearing from him again than what he did. He actually wanted my grandma and parents dead too; he started dropping hints that suggested that and by the time I realized what he really was, I was been sucked in badly.
Those monster don't even have to hit you at all to get you stuck. His repetitive words whenever I would tried to walk away were ''Remember I'm the best, you'll never find anyone as good as me'' or ''You're in your 30's now, you'll never find anyone as good as me''.

[Vesuvius87]

Hints that suggested he wanted my family dead:
- He kept pressuring me to investigate about my father's living will and his properties
- He said ''When your grandma dies, don't speak to your aunt, don't go visit the house anymore''
- He kept pressuring me to know how to run a house along because of an ''you won't have your parents forever, what if they die in an accident, anything can happen''.

EVIL

[DiegoO]

@Vesuvius87 They are fucking garbage, they feel like garbage and they want you to lower yourself to their pathetic view.

[Vesuvius87]

@DiegoO
Indeed they're garbage. I think the only way that gets them is you being happy and moving on with your life WITHOUT them. I actually found someone better just weeks after getting rid of that garbage and been in my current relationship for nearly 9 months now. I wasn't even looking, things happen and have common interests.

[DiegoO]

It's really fucked up. A 10.

[Pinay_ako]

“You deserve what you tolerate.”

It sounds harsh but only the woman herself can free herself from the chains and shackles of this prison called a one sided relationship. How long does she intend to serve time with a spineless abusive narcissist is all up to her…

[OlderAndWiser]

I think it's very, very low. If a guy just wants sex without commitment, it seems there are enough girls avaialble who would agree to casual sex, so hat's the point of hurting someone's feelings?

[D_Bone_Steak]

We going to whip our metaphorical dicks out and measure them between the genders? Both sides use some brutal tactics just to get what they want. I'm not choosing sides because I could've easily came out as a woman, but I happen to be a man. The cruel shit is cruel no matter who uses it... But it is funny hearing someone say feed em the dream and keep them hoping and seeing it work. I don't care what sex you are... you've seen your sex do that shit and you also know it works. Like it or hate it, you know it god damn well exists and it's all around us. I don't think it's right, but it's a thing. And simply because it works so well, natural selection kicks any dude or dudette off their high horse when they get played by it.

[GallopAcrossEurope]

A 7 out of 10. These are the kind of people that bring children into the world, then completely abandon them and leave the mom to deal with not only the kids but the guy's shit. Then you know, the mom wants a divorce and all that... this is how we get many scarred youths that are susceptible to influence of some other "fatherly" figure that may or not be malicious.

[Vesuvius87]

That was my ex boyfriend; a narcissistic sociopath. I would give it a 8-9 out of 10. You're not just a jerk or bad guy for doing that. You're EVIL.

I can get over getting used for sex and the guy leaving but destroying my trust, my hopes, my dreams and to add insult to the injury... scamming me with money and never paying it back. That takes the price of a horrible person. I never ever want to see nor hear from him again.

[Anonymous]

There are 2 problems with your issue.

A) You don't have the institution of marriage to force him to honor his commitment.

B) Your not actively working on making the desired kids to prove he's telling the truth.

In the past if this truly was his desire he would marry you and make the kids right away, Not years from now, but within 6 months.
Today you don't have said protection but still he would prove it if that were the case.

[Asker]

Yet I can't believe several other women are giving this pathetic loser a chance. I don't fall for this crap nor buy it but two of my friends did.

[TacosRAwesome]

So I think that most men believe it the first time they say it to a woman is an most men are looking for a wife. But if they change their minds they need to be honest and let the woman go. It hurts to be dumped but it hurts more to be made like your feelings are not valid and wrong.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

I don't think it's cruel, it's really ineffective if anything.

A guy saying that but not behaving in a way that would keep me with him is just lying. That's not cruel, but it is stupid. And fortunately grounds for me to break up.

[andreasderjuengere]

This ''line'' would be very cruel towards myself.

But - hey! - I hear the same words thrown at myself as well.

A known danger is only half the danger. So I rate this issue a ''5'' out of ''10''

[Vegasrunner]

All is fair in love and war. Some guys have to do what they have to do to keep a woman. I dont think its particularly cruel in fact if it get you the desired goal it could be considered smart.

[Asker]

So basically they can't get a girl to sleep with them without that fake promise? They have to lie to get it. I'm not impressed.
Impressive are the guys that are able to get women to sleep with him without lying about marriage and kids. In fact, him saying ''I never want marriage'' and women still wanting to have sex with him. Now that's impressive.

[Asker]

Cool is people wanting the real you, admiring you without having to lie.

[Vegasrunner]

@ Asker Lol, whether you are personally impressed or not is irrelevant. No guy is thinking about the opinion of random people while having sex. So does this mean that women who put on makeup, fake lashes, lips etc are unimpressive to you?

[FilmGuy93]

That would be extremely cruel. I don’t know where I would put that on a 1-10 scale, but that would be a pretty horrible thing to do.

[genericname85]

how idiotic is it to fall for this line if you're with an obvious player? xD

[Asker]

Not me (it would be obvious) but several other girls and two of my friends have given these players a chance. Unbelievable.
Why would any girl fall for a ''Someday we'll have kids''? My reply would be ''I dare you to get fired from your job and say someday I'll have another job''.

[genericname85]

it's insecurity. they hope a "unlikable guy" changes "just for them" so that they have a safe partner that no other woman will "steal".

[Anonymous]

If they believed their own lie, maybe 5/10. I think this happens sometimes. If they knew it was a lie, 10/10 evil.

[cloud9vortex1234]

Not the worst someone could do, but that's still really low. Definitely not someone I would trust if I found out they did that.

[malwins]

Yeah why would he say that if he’s not actually interested smh

[Anonymous]

No more cruel then the feminine wiles women use to attract, snare, and keep a guy.

[Jamie05rhs]

Did your mother not warn you about this?

[Asker]

I don't fall for that obvious lie but a couple other girls and two of my friends did. It's like they never run out of those mediocre players.

[Jamie05rhs]

Aw :/

[Guy13]

Devastatingly cruel 7-8 to me…

[Guy13]

Hurt peoples body is life but to destroy their soul and kill their spirit for sport is so so wrong

[Vesuvius87]

Indeed. They're evil people to me. I hope my ex boyfriend continues having a miserable life. I guess him being the one with infertility issues (he could never get his other past gfs pregnant) is enough punishment for him.

[Guy13]

@Vesuvius87 I guess so. Sounds like that was a rough ride and good to have in the rear iew mirror.

[TroyDT]

Very cruel. I hate manipulation.

[watercolor_lions]

10

That's psychotic and very narcissistic

[Darine123]

Guys good at lies for sex

[Fromdusktilldawn]

Not as cruel as women babytrapping men

[Light909090]

Not Cruel at all

[littlemisslolita]

Extremely