Tell her she’s making a mistake
Stay quiet and be supportive
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It depends on her age and experience. If you've dated plenty and had quite as bit of sex and have worked out what you want from a partner, you can evaluate potential partners quite quickly (it's possible in three hours to get to the point of 'this could be my potential spouse') and then it's a case of spending sufficient time to confirm that your initial opinions were not wrong.
If you're much younger and this is a veritable 'love at first site' whirlwind romance, the risks are of course greater. It's the high risk strategy for the highest possible return (the most wonderful experience being finding your true love and knowing instinctively from day 1 that they were).
It's your call because you know them and I don't.
you can ask questions to see how rational she is and gauge compatibility, but at that early stage... the infatuation drugs are still running strong.
you can't talk sense into someone that is on drugs, especially if she's 30ish and has one on the hook. you'll have to let it go, just ask questions and wish her the best, give her support.
if you see a train wreck, then I would tell her you don't want to be involved in it. I literally had people do that with me and a prior... I should have heeded the warnings...
Quiet and supportive. Many people have married after a few months and end up spending the rest of their lives together. This is her life to fuck up or not fuck up. Just be supportive. Because if you aren’t, and they last, I guarantee you that she will hold some resentment towards that and you may lose a friend.
i mean it depends on the guy and how happy she feels and if everyone approves, it's your choice really but if you go with telling her it's a mistake, try and be a bit softer than that - plus it could be a long engagement
Opinion
16Opinion
Quiet and supportive. It's her life. She will learn fast and hard when things go south. I don't know the guy or his reactions. Is she marrying for money, because she likes him, because she wants a kid... Logically she probably knows it's crazy. It's a emotional decision. Should she wait? Probably. Loneliness does things to people. Maybe she is lonely and thinks he is the one. Yeah warn her. She is spellbound. Divorces are a lot harder than marriages. Maybe she needs a prenump. Its a lot less messy that way.. and test the guy a little. Ya know
Length of time you been with someone is not always an indicative of how long the marriage will be. I have known couples who had a short marriage after knowing each other for less than a year and those you were together for years before getting married. I have known couples who have been married for 10+ years tuat got married within a year of k owing each other and those who got married after knoweach other for years.
How do you know she's making a mistake? Be a good supportive friend. If you can't do that, at least remain neutral.
FYI, there are many couples who got married shortly after meeting, and lived long and happy marriages.
It’s not your relationship. You can’t control her. Just be supportive. Unless you think she’s marrying someone whose a serious danger. Just pray for her. That things go well.
Give her your opinion since you feel strongly about it
It’s her life. Her victories, her mistakes. We can’t put people we care about in a bubble to protect them. That’s not living.
People should wait 6 months before considering getting married, and then get married after a year of going out
could be the love of her life or a total disaster but in the end its her life all you can do is be there and support her as a friend
I think people should know who they are really marrying and not rush into it. At least live together first and see if that works. Get a dog and see if they can at least take care of that responsibly before you have kids.
What's wrong with guy? Refreshing to hear people marrying instead of friends with benefits for 50 years.
I would stay out of this but after a few headlines people have to speak up
Why? What's wrong with the guy? What do you have against him? He might just be good for her.
Is it your friend or the guy pushing for it so badly?
Either way, it can go very badly. Buut you tried to help tho :)
Let People Make Their OWN Decision!!!
You probably cannot even make prompt, definite, firm decision for your own life; leave hers alone.
Ironically, you likely won't know if it's a mistake or not, until several years later.
It's definitely a gamble.
Better than wasting a year or several years with someone you aren't even that into
Just tell her how you feel and be done with it.
Chuck and Kay Smith were married six weeks after meeting.
Are you just concerned that she hasn't been with the guy long enough, or do you have other concerns?
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