Why did it took me so long to figure out I never really loved my ex boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

Well he did turned out to be a horrible person in the end. But here is the twist and I finally figured it out after all these years: I NEVER REALLY LOVED HIM.

I've been lusting over him just for being my 1st. I was fantasizing about a fairytale where I would have my happy ending. He was disrespecting my mother and talking bad about my grandma and I was placing that POS on a pedestal, calling him my A+.

Then once that lustful (it's a similar effect to being drunk or drugged; it's like you're intoxicated) stage faded and he scammed me with money; I saw nothing but a disgusting person, someone I really felt nothing for. I couldn't find any reason why I had supposedly fallen in love with him nor what I liked about him at that time. Finally I couldn't think of any other than attraction and obsession with ending the happy story with the 1st man.

It took me so long to figure that out; that I never loved him. It was lust and obsession. Why did it take me that long?

Updates

1 y

I've been living a fantasy for too long and it never was love. I never loved him.

[Fireguy17]

Because you are human and that is what we do.
You overlooked the bad side because you were twitterpated with what you saw, aka lusted over.
But in time that fades and you started to see him for what he really was and moved on.
Lesson learned, so move on to the next person once you meet them.

[Asker]

Yes it was indeed infatuation (not love) for that worthless trash. Actually I'm already in a relationship (way better than that trash) for nearly 10 months now. I do not lust over him but enjoy his company, have many similar goals, talked about our routines, and spend lots of real quality time.

[Asker]

In this relationship, we're actually waiting till marriage.

[Fireguy17]

glad to hear that!

[Steamnir]

Girl same.
being honest with yourself is the biggest gift you can ever give to you