I want kids she dosent?

[Anonymous]

Dating this girl who I really like a lot but she dosent want anymore kids ( she has 1 from a previous marriage) It was always a dream to be able to be a father and now I don't know. Is it grounds to break things off?

[BCRanger10]

I think it's at least worth addressing with her that it's a concern of yours. It's one thing if a woman is blonde and you want a brunette or she's an inch or two taller than you want. But this is a major life desire of yours. It's something that needs to at least be discussed.

[Asker]

She's pretty dead set on her decision just really would not like to loose her but I don't if getting past this is an option unfortunately.

[BCRanger10]

Why doesn't she want more kids?

[Asker]

She's more set on traveling after she grows up. Believes she can't do that if she has more children

[BCRanger10]

How old is her child now?

[Asker]

10 right now soon yo be 11

[Splitroop]

I was in a similar position this summer : I don't want kids (never) but she does, not now but she definitely wants it to be a part of her life at some point. We both never loved anyone so much but this would definitely make one of us suffer for years.
So I did why I had to : I ripped out my heart (figuratively) and broke with her, wishing her that she finds some that can give her what I can not.

Staying together together would have been a bad idea : the longer you wait, the harder it becomes to find someone to have a child with.

[DaisyM23]

If she really doesn't want kids and you don't want to accept her kid as your kid, then just break things off early on before it hurts worse later - there's a small chance of her changing her mind maybe but just talk it through and decide if you want to pursue this relationship further

[Asker]

It's not that or wouldn't want to accept the little one as my own. Just missing out on things like first steps etc.. Just want to experience.

[DaisyM23]

no I know, I didn't mean for my words to come across as judgmental if you felt that, it's up to you and if you can accept having a kid that's already at a certain age, if you want that newborn experience then that's still okay, there's no real obligation if you haven't been together that long - talk about it with her and come to a decision

[Lowiu]

If its a hard opinion for both of your at least one of you won't be happy in the future and if she is around your age I dont think it will change much

[Asker]

She is 30 I am 29

[Berethor]

Dating a single mom is a bad idea, she don't want more kids? then she good only for sex.

[LazerBean]

Easy and immediate deal breaker.

[Anonymous]

That’s a deal breaker in my opinion.