Am I being dramatic? My boyfriend has been ignoring me for 14 hours?

[Anonymous]

He opened my messsge and has ignored me for 14 hours. He’s now online has not said good morning or anything. I also have a gut feeling he was with a Girl last night but am I being too emotional by confronting him. He always does this. He will give me 1 day replies or 2 day replies. I tell him now it affects me and he just dosent change? Im his girlfriend, how am I not the first thing on his mind when he wakes up? Even my friends with benefits replied more than this. He knows how it makes me feel I’ve told him. Yet he continues to carry on taking agies and treating me like this? When I say I’ll leave he begs for me back and does little things then goes back to how is not really Is again.

Updates

1 y

I HAD. A friends with benefits.

Updates

1 y

I HAD a friends with benefits and he treated me
Better.

[starfoxxy64]

On all truth I would say dump him an dleabe him in the dust. I have been totally where you are and on all truth please leave this immature person who calls himself a boyfriend and it's not you will be here Peter Pan and will never grow up. I am sorry because he won't show you any respect because has no idea how to respect himself because how he treats you , will showing on how he would treat any other female.


My own father who actually past away from stage 4 lung cancer in March 2017 . And my so called of a cheater Sean had been completely lying and told me after he and I started in June 23, 2013 he began to jast get bored 🥱 and he was thinking having a open-relationship for himaelf since he claims he loss his spark with me yet still had actually kept saying to his own family and his own mother who I had a positive and good relationship with his mom. She was told by her son ( ex- boyfriend ) that he and I broken up few years ago. Which I began to cry because I was such unbelievable on how low her son who she is a religious Catholic family and woman who I have noticed never would have raised any of her 3 sons like how my own now as of him even Dumping me this passed week ago or whatever because he would told that even though was shocking is that this other just a "Female Friends " that started completely dating which she actually claims to telling that she needed to have proof of a ring 💍 for real friends would only truly believe that she was for sure in a real relationship. Which I then found she lied and also told him that she lose the 1st so then he actually was still had been having spend me before he had began fully ghosting me since I was then remembering him actually few years before my father died he had the man to man talk with my father and my father had given him the firmest 🪨 Handshake with my father yet even even went to still even finally tell that the did have sex with her which why I found those not use condom which he lied about saying he and I were to have fun when he has the next day off of his jobs. Which after I found out in January 2020 he gets arrested after he had called me telling me he was heading back home from work which was just a huge cover up because the gold digger female who had been the homewrecker starting February 2014 which had called him to the Northside where I actually happen to live only 20 minutes away from his own cheating ex -fiance yet now after he gets arrested and she gets him charged with domestic battery charge against him and also with bodily harm charged. Which she actually during the court hearing and case against him the Judge told while both were under oath that Both parties MUST STOP ALL CONTACT in any way and any forms must not at all continue. Which I have proof from him and his own email showing that she actually sent him a chat and email to him while they still fighting during the case which she , actually can be happy because I guess him and her yes that same homewrecker actually started talking again and she even had made a huge fun statement few years back telling that she has him and will always have him. Calling me a CUNT which I was thinking about how much his own mother will happy when this Christmas he will have her come back after his own mother actually had gotten the call about him getting arrested and then she was actually very disturbing with how she was lied by her own son since , she actually was given me the mother in law , small chats like she had told me "she was glad that her son finally found a kind and caring young women like you Mara , which I shocked since I only had met his family on the worst day of their lives was sadly his own father had sudden heart attack which he had actually was going to be a planned family dinner that same night which his father was going it be flying into town like his normal routine which ; me and the boyfriend had talked I was going to be meeting his mother and father which sadly never happened. And I only had met his mother , 2 brothers and his uncle , aunts and cousins. Which all of them has been completely lied to since he went back to her after 3 year ago and had refused to become a part of the casting call for that MTV new TV show Help Relationship, about having a person finding secrets and some times heartache becuase I just want wish I could get any reasonable answer and truth to why a person who had been saying that

[Graci_e]

Obviously not talking 24/7 is normal and healthy and sometimes if things are going on, you might talk less. But my boyfriend has never left me on open for 14h, even if he’s busy he makes time for me. We call every night to sleep and not once has he forgotten to or just went to bed without calling. He promised that if he ever can’t call, of course he’d tell me but that hasn’t ever happened.

But that’s because he’s a good and genuine person. He genuinely cares for me, respects me and understands me. He wants to talk to me just as much as I walk to talk to him. He likes me just as much as I like him.

If someone likes you and wants to be with you, they’ll make time for you and talk to you. They’ll want to talk to you. Of course you won’t talk to them 24/7 cause people have lives, but they’ll still make time for you.

You should be with someone who makes you feel comfortable, secure and loved. You don’t need to be with someone that makes you feel insignificant, ignored, anxious, insecure, etc. That’s not the point of dating someone. It doesn’t have to be hard and it doesn’t have to be forced. You shouldn’t have to force him to talk to you.

If you communicated how you felt, there should have been an outcome. If he’s busy, that should have been explained. If he’s having a tough time, that should have been explained. And if he simply didn’t realise, a compromise or routine should be made, something that works for both of you. That’s a healthy and respectful relationship.

You don’t have to be with someone who treats you like shit. You don’t have to feel this way. You can leave and you’ll feel so much better for it. No more waiting on his time and replies, no more feeling anxious and unloved. It’ll be hard and you’ll be sad, but in the long run it will be so worth it.

You can find someone one that that respects you, that loves you, that cares for you, that makes time for you, that makes you feel safe and secure. But for now just focus on yourself until that right person come along.

My ex boyfriend was like your boyfriend. I used to be so anxious and it drove me crazy. I felt like shit most the time cause of him. I had to force him to talk me, but it’s not worth it. Now I have the best boyfriend in the world and I 100% see us getting married one day when we’re older.

You deserve better so know your worth and leave him. He doesn’t deserve you and if you have that gut feeling, it means something so don’t ignore it.

[Inbox]

"You should be with someone who makes you feel comfortable, secure and loved. You don’t need to be with someone that makes you feel insignificant, ignored, anxious, insecure, etc. That’s not the point of dating someone. It doesn’t have to be hard and it doesn’t have to be forced. You shouldn’t have to force him to talk to you." AKA the truth.

[itsalyssaagain]

Thing is I’m not 16. I’m 25 years old and I’ll be very frank with you I have no energy for a phone call every night lol. It would be nice to have them a few days of course!! But not every night. At the end of the day different relationships have different dynamics I guess but that shouldn’t be a thing :/

[Graci_e]

@itsalyssaagain Yep that’s reasonable too. I just used it as an example cause that’s something we’ve done since he started talking and it’s something we both expect now, so it would be shit just for us to just not call without explaining like some people would do.

[msc545]

It sounds like you are feeling hurt and neglected in your relationship. It's important to communicate your feelings and concerns to your partner, and it's also important to have a relationship where you feel valued and respected. It's not healthy for your partner to ignore you or to make you feel like you are not a priority in their life.

It's understandable that you might be feeling emotional about this situation, but it's important to approach any conversation with your partner in a calm and rational manner. It might be helpful to set aside some time to have a specific conversation about your concerns, and to let your partner know how their behavior is impacting you. It's also important to listen to their perspective and to try to understand where they are coming from.

It's not healthy for a relationship to be based on fear of losing the other person, and it's important to set boundaries and to be clear about what you need and expect in a relationship. If your partner is unable or unwilling to meet your needs and respect your boundaries, it may be necessary to reevaluate the relationship. Ultimately, it's important to be in a relationship where you feel loved and supported.

[Lucifer_01]

There is no point to think in this perspective. Let's change the perspective.
SO there are so many possibilities what is happening here

1. He is busy with his schedule.

Means, when he first wake up He check his phone and answer his friend's message which is pending from last night. Then he get busy with his work and forget about your text.
he FORGET, there is a point in a life they get stuck on something that makes them don't think about anything. don't doubt that he FORGET to message you or see there is another thing that you guys are in long period of relationship and you don't feel love from him, stop thinking like this. coz he is trying to make you feel love but what happened is you are used to his love, you can't feel something special coz you are use to it. DON'T DOUBT ON HIM UNTIL YOU GET EVIDENCE.

2. Your perspective "he is cheating on you"

He is tired of love. We human being love the feeling of get loved and also he is getting used to your love he don't feel special. he need something new.

tip :- try to make move from your side, means try to impress him, if that not work straight leave him, don't think about him any more he don't deserve you.

good luck

[DaveJord]

He is not going to change because you are allowing him to get away with it. This guy is totally playing games with you... and you need to do some self-reflection on yourself, because you are angry that he is not changing, but the truth is neither are you. You both are still doing the same things... and he is probably taking advantage of you, and you are letting it happen.

Might be time to end this relationship no way would I put up with it myself. This would have been over for me way back... honestly, I never get involved with people that do this type of shit.

[Rosexøxø]

All I needed was to read the first line and I gave my like to the comment.

I’ll read on but like DUDE lmao you nailed it in one sentence and usually people get it around the end when they figure out what they want to say and got all the tough stuff out, but you got it right on the first sentence. I hope she reads that line. 👐 well said

[DaveJord]

@Rosexøxø thanks

[Rosexøxø]

Ofc 😊👐

[Summeroflove]

You have a friends with benefits and a boyfriend? Seems like you’re the one with bigger problems.


You’re the piece of shit. If you’re his girlfriend he should be the only man you want that way. Maybe he was sleeping or had other things to do. If you want to text him text him

[Haaa135]

She probably means that she HAD a friends with benefits in the past, not that she has one while having a boyfriend

[Summeroflove]

@Haaa135 I’m not sure because she ain’t replied

[Summeroflove]

Haha you just never go away do you? I already blocked two of your accounts please tell me you’re someone else. We’re NOT getting into this again I can tell you that

[humanearth]

Right that's what I said

She has a friends with benefits and she is worried that her boyfriend is cheating

[Summeroflove]

@humanearth I know…… projection much? It’s crazy how some people think they can do something but their partner can’t.

If she’s cheating she deserves a man who cheats on her. Better then a loyal man being with her getting her craps and HIV SHE CAN KEEP IT

[Asker]

No I don’t have a friends with benefits I had a Friends with benefits

[Asker]

I DONT HAVE A. FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS OH MY GOODNESS

[Asker]

I HAD a friends with benefits, he treated me
Better

[Summeroflove]

Okay okay okay simmer down. I understand then.

[BlueScorpio]

Relationship doesn't sound to healthy and is causing more stress. If he's not that serious about the relationship, then it's best to walk away from entirely for the both of you.

[Guy13]

So, you are still with him, why? Figure YOURSELF out first before you judge, condemn, and get deeply involved with another...

[Rosexøxø]

This is very helpful. She may not like the tone, but this is so very true. Saves a lottt of heartache

[Guy13]

@Rosexøxø Thank you... could improve on taking the edge for sure !!

[AviatorTom]

Do you really expect him to immediately reply to you all the time. Give the guy a break. Sometimes, we guys need some alone time. Stop trying to be so controlling.

[Graci_e]

I understand what you’re saying and how you interpreted it that way. Of course you’re never gonna talk 24/7, but it sounds as if he’s making absolutely no time for her. He left her on open for 14h which is a bit shit. Something might be going on for him, but I doubt it since if he really cared, he’d communicate that. It sounds like he’s just an arse.

[OlderAndWiser]

How long have you two been dating? Do you have an agreement to be monogamous and exclusive?

[OlderAndWiser]

You have now ignored me for more than 14 hours. I'm not being dramatic; you have treated me HORRIBLY!

[Rosexøxø]

@brownyyy said cold shoulder. You could observe well with this method.

and @itsalyssaagain said communication and proper evidence. That’s more direct and clear.

Both really good answers, and two different approaches. I think you should consider their advice.

Best not to assume anything without proper clues.

Some people get held up. Usually not stuck up 🔫 lol but aside from my odd joke,

literally if you both have different schedules this has to be a reality you face? Maybe come together to plan and be intentional about quality time after you both finish busier schedules.

OR

find ways you could somehow find jobs together?

OR consider if you both having different schedules will not benefit this relationship, and finishing someone who can spend more time with you will be better

OR

try to adapt to him having his own schedule and you having yours? Being content with yourself when he’s not around.

Think about it. Consider your options.
Great options listed by the two ladies above, and a lot of great points made by the answers in this feed so far.

Best to you sis. It can certainly be tough to experience.

[Rosexøxø]

Lmao update: a lot of dudes clearly have been hurt here. They didn’t read the whole thing 😂☝️😭

I read it and I TOO almost thought you had both, but realized you just had previous experience with a friends with benefits.

Guys like provocative girls and all that sometimes yk fun girls but they never want a girl to have fun if it’s not with him 😂

He may not love her or marry her but if she has fun with someone else he’ll be pissed about it.

This could be right and/or wrong. It’s just like come on guyssss

How can girls be fun AND pure at the same time. That really lowers our statistics of finding the RIGHT guy who will be committed to us? 🤷‍♀️ Oh whalez

[chilldude33]

The problem is not having fun, it's talking about it. It gets vivid imagination going and could remind the dude that he had less fun, and here's she who is talking about who did what to her in details. 😬

[chilldude33]

(not talking about the poster by the way, just in general)

[Rosexøxø]

@chilldude33 I see some truthful things but your point eludes me and that’s sad for me. Please feel free to clarify if you wish

[itsalyssaagain]

Ok text messages and how long he takes to reply doesn’t really mean much. This is coming from a clingy person but it doesn’t.


However if he’s your boyfriend you should be able to
call him any time and he should always pick up. Call him and ask him how his day was and what he was up to last night.


If you don’t trust him and you think he was with a girl last night (without any evidence like he hasn’t been acting weird lately) then there’s no point in being with him. Trust and respect form the foundation to every relationship.

[DaveJord]

That last paragraph is the truth. In all my successful realationships my girlfreinds never took more than few hours to respond. In all the bull shit relationships I have had, shit like not texting all day or constantly waiting until the next... never played with me.

And absolutely if they are responding then you should be able to call and get answer.

[Rosexøxø]

I don't know if I’d personally follow this, but at a glance, it’s good advice. It reads well. It doesn’t seem illogical. Helpfully phrased. 🙏

[itsalyssaagain]

Thanks guys. This is stuff I picked being anxious and clingy myself

[Lexa_99]

He’s literally playing with you. I can’t believe you have the title of being his girlfriend and he’s treating you like this. Please leave and never look back. You literally can do better. This just made me so sad for you because he should be saying good morning to you Every morning and good night every night and in between should be checking on you and asking how you’re doing and how your day is going. If he’s not doing any of that it’s because he doesn’t care. You know actions are also words right? Actions speak louder than words.

[Emii_Urashima]

Can we PLEASE get the option to ignore these featured questions that will not go away? This has been the first question shown on live feed for over a week with the silly stock photo. I understand that the anonymous moderator is VERY proud of their question, but can we finally give it a rest?

[Reece12345]

I think if he really cared about you he'd have his eyes peeled for your texts and as soon as sees them he'd open them right then.

A guy who's really into you will spend all his time with you cause there's nowhere he'd be happier than with you.

I think you should make good on your threat to leave him. Just in in my opinion this half-assed bullshit from him just doesn't work.

[Smc08]

Sounds like he’s just not that into you. I’m not sure if it’s always been this way but there’s not really anything you can do about it. He probably is chasing after some other girl. He doesn’t chase you because he feels like he already has you. As my bestest and most trusted guy friends would say, “he’s a dog. Let him hunt.”

[Alwayreckles93]

Dump his ass! He isn't going to change. Advice don't waste your time and energy on him. If his going to act immature like a 10 year old. He isn't ready for a serious relationship. I've been there once. I am sure you can do better. Why hasn't he talk to you like an adult would? He is just playing games. This boy and yes mentally he is still a boy not a men he can't handle a real relationship.

[integrale77]

Yup I think your being a bit to ott.
I have a job where I can read a message while at work but not time to reply, this can apply to other things I do and same with your boyfriend.

I also in the past have been known to read a message and not get round to replying simply because I forgot this could conceivably get to 2 days.

Basically yes he's being annoying but will he change unlikely or very little. Can you adapt to how he is?

[Adam1978]

You should really ask yourself why you are like that? What is so damn important that it can't wait until you get an reply? If you want close contact with a guy you need to be there in person. That's how you get to be a priority not by sending a for him probably pointless texts. We are physical beings, so do your boyfriend/girlfriend interaction in person instead of use the proxy of a phone. A god morning is probably the one you wake up together, not the one you are apart.

[goartgirl]

I feel like when one person puts more effort in a relationship and is texting and communicating more, it usually means that person likes their partner more.. Like I get you have feelings for him, but you also have to see the value in you and if you're willing to accept the fact that he's not putting the same effort as you. Maybe for some time, spend more time with yourself and try to not think of him as much.. And if you feel in your heart that he doesn't love you, I think you should trust your instinct. I hope whatever happens, it'll work out for the best <3

[thegreenyogi]

Just because he gives you 1 or 2 day replies doesn't necessarily mean it's because he's not into you. There could be many reasons why someone would read your messages and reply later like for example being extremely busy and just having enough time to read it and reply later or any other reason like having to run out the door because something came up that has nothing to do with you or the relationship.

[Sisters_Of_Time]

Maybe yaaa because it's not urgent. I usually reply quick but I never say something for the sake of saying something. But I Love to text with people I am close to. Maybe he is not much of a texter. Ask him why he sometimes replies late. Don't jump to conclusions like cheating. If you're wrong you might be actively destroying your relationship without realizing it!

[FinalFantasyBro]

You should try to message him again to see if he pick it up and message back if he doesn't message back that means he is annoying you and it's not looking like a honorable relationship. He is either really busy right now or he is being sneaky and hiding something from you.

[Anonymous]

14 hours? Smdh.

He might be in a bad mood about something that has nothing to do with you. But he doesn’t want to take it out on you and needs space. Maybe he’s frustrated because you are acting way too clingy. The fact you posted a such a question asking above you probably are.

Who knows. Give him space. If he ignores you for 48 hours you might have a different problem on your hands.