Why people need to be so nasty?

[Anonymous]

I've been nothing but nice to people yet i get treated like crap due to my health issues and it makes me really upset and i get blamed for reacting that way?

Updates

+1 y

Sorry i mean people irk, family etc

Updates

+1 y

Irl

[Anonymous]

It's unfortunate that some people can be cruel or insensitive, and it's understandable that this can be hurtful and frustrating. However, it's important to remember that people's behavior is often a reflection of their own issues and insecurities, rather than a reflection of your worth as a person.

It's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and to set boundaries around how you are willing to be treated. This may involve standing up for yourself, asserting your needs and boundaries, and seeking support from friends, family, or professionals.

It's also important to remember that your reactions are valid and understandable, and that you should not be blamed for feeling upset or hurt by others' behavior. It's okay to express your emotions and to seek help and support if you need it.

Ultimately, it's important to focus on the positive relationships and interactions in your life, and to surround yourself with people who treat you with kindness and respect.

[Asker]

See my brothers completely different than my sis and bro in law, despite going through hell himself he still knows how to show someone respect. Even if weve argued in the past.

It shouldn't matter if my health means i need more help with things, that shouldn't be any reflection on my personality or how i am when im well. I make the effort with people when im well, im very rarely rude to others, only if theyre rude to me. Im also never rude about things people cabt control, like the way they speak but i get people laughing at my voice

Another thing is when im upset i lash out due to my anxiety and this affects the kids and they won't play with me and my niece acts like she doesn't like me, but theyre too young to understand why im like that.

[Opinion Owner]

Everyone has their own struggles and challenges, and that we should strive to treat others with compassion and empathy, regardless of their health or circumstances.

It's understandable that you may feel frustrated or upset when people treat you poorly or laugh at your voice, but it's important to remember that their behavior is a reflection of them, not you. You are not responsible for their actions or attitudes, and you have every right to assert your boundaries and demand respect.

It's also important to recognize that anxiety and other mental health issues can be difficult to navigate, and that it's okay to seek help and support if you need it. You may want to consider talking to a therapist or counselor who can help you develop coping strategies and communication skills to better manage your emotions and interactions with others.

Remember that you are a valuable and worthy person, regardless of your health or circumstances, and that you deserve to be treated with kindness, respect, and dignity. Focus on building positive relationships with people who appreciate and value you, and don't let the negativity of others bring you down.

[Asker]

Yeah I've really been trying to work on it. I dont lash out as much as i used to, i generally just end up going to my room. I said to my mum i can't control the way others are, but i just usually get the blame as its easier for them not to address the real issue. I have to rearrange my summer because of these issues which will cost us more money :(

im really trying to better myself and i feel I've learned a lot from my experiences in the last year, meeting new people has been interesting the way you have different dynamics with different people, just being used to ny family i wasn't learning that different people can have an affect on everything and actually make u a better person and sven more interesting.

[Opinion Owner]

its okay luv. It sounds like you're making progress and learning a lot about yourself and others, which is a great step forward. It's important to recognize that growth and change take time, and that it's okay to make mistakes along the way.

It can be frustrating when others don't understand or acknowledge the challenges that you're facing, but it's important to remember that you are not alone and that there are people who care about you and want to support you.

It's great that you're open to meeting new people and exploring new dynamics, as this can be a great way to expand your horizons and learn more about yourself and the world around you. Keep focusing on your own growth and well-being, and don't be afraid to reach out for help and support when you need it.

[Asker]

Its difficult to know what kind of personality u have. If someone asked me what mine was i wouldn't be able to answer it.

I just take those for granted who do like me and I've ended up taking advantage of their kindness. I dont know how to stop this, a lot of people tend to stop talking to me and i feel everytime it happens it has that affect on me i tske peoples words when theyre nice to heart and it gives me high expectations of them and when i dont get it i feel let down even though they haven't done anything wrong

[Opinion Owner]

Right. It's understandable to feel unsure about your personality or how others perceive you. It's important to remember that everyone has their own unique strengths and weaknesses, and that it's okay to have areas where you may need to work on yourself.

It's also important to recognize that taking advantage of others' kindness can be harmful to both you and the people around you. It's important to work on building healthy relationships based on mutual respect, trust, and consideration for each other's needs and boundaries.

If you find that you have high expectations of others and feel let down when they don't meet them, it may be helpful to work on adjusting your expectations and focusing on what you can control in your own behavior and interactions. This may involve setting realistic goals and boundaries for yourself, practicing self-compassion and self-care, and seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional.

Building healthy relationships takes time and effort, and that it's okay to make mistakes along the way. Keep working on yourself and your relationships, and don't be afraid to seek help and support when you need it.

[Orion76]

Were they like that to start with or were they nice and later turned hostile? It’s important

[Asker]

Yeah my brother in laws parents were fine to start with, yet last November his dad just suddenly started being nasty for no reason m I've never been nothing but nice to them and my health issues shouldn't be a reason for them to change.

[Asker]

Id also just lost my job, which they knew about yet didn't even ask me how i was

[Asker]

I used to look forward to seeing them, now i dread it

[Orion76]

I had someone in my life that I trusted with everything, I was a very popular guy among friends family and even some strangers for the fact I treat everyone with respect and I help whenever I can. I didn’t know it bothered this person since they were very supportive and wondering why people are so unfair. In the end I noticed that anyone that met that person quickly either disappeared from my life or got nasty towards me. People I’ve known for years once introduced to that person they go away or change, some got in my face and I don’t respond well to unexpected assaults verbally of course. Unfair treatment angers me so all they need to do is just that and I’ll do the rest I would say things that makes me the bad person all the time. And again that person was very aware of this point.

[Orion76]

I hope this isn’t the case with you and best of luck

[Asker]

Its passive aggressive, they can get away with it but if you react badly you're the bad guy. Its like you're not allowed to stand up for yourself

[Orion76]

They don’t ask you anything bad happened because they are expecting every bad to happen based on the idea they have about you it comes as no surprise

[Orion76]

Just read some replies and let me tell you the best thing to do is to ask the person involved straight up as soon as another interaction of this kind happens did I do something to upset you? I thought we got along fine if there is a reason for this I wound like to address it. See what they say it might be all a misunderstanding.

[Orion76]

Thank you for mho

[Agape93]

Welcome to the internet. Strangers don't care about who you are as a person, only if you are what they like or want.

[Asker]

I meang people irl

[Agape93]

Same thing applies

[Asker]

When theyre nasty to me my whole body shakes and i react badly cos ic ant cope, yet they just repeat their behaviour

[Agape93]

That's because you don't matter to them. Your anxiety is inconsequential. Most don't care if it makes you mad, or is the final straw drawing you to jump off a bridge.

[Asker]

So my initial family dont care? May aswell not even be alive as I've no friends either

[Agape93]

I've no idea. I know most of my family has 0 consideration for my happiness, safety or wellbeing. But I'm an aberration in that regard. But best thing you can do is keep trying. Good folks are out there, they're just hidden in a pile of shit called society.

[Asker]

The one person who did seem to genuinely like me, i fucked it up because i couldnt understand why they were being so nice to me and wanted to be around me, when most people just seem to bare me around

[Agape93]

That happens. Its a trauma response, and not everyone sees that or knows how to handle that

[Asker]

Id give anything to be able to speak to them again, its part of the reasons y i get so upset lately, people dont realize what ur going through as they dont ask or care

[Agape93]

Agreed. For me even if someone does ask, they can't help so I don't bother saying anything.

You might be neurodivergent. It's not a bad thing it just means you see things differently than normal folks

[Asker]

My sister probably could help me in my situation but she just doesn't care. I feel like i dont even have a sister

[Agape93]

I understand that. My family consists of people I have 0 blood relation with. I found those who accept and care about me, and made them my family. My treasure.

You can do it too. It just takes time

[HippieVeganJewslim]

How can improbable imperfect creatures be not nasty? OK, many are quite nice and respectful. I’d give them a pat on the back. Many others don’t want to.

[clampfan101]

I don’t know why they are, but I certainly know they don’t actually need to. Civilization needs to get back on its feet.

[Asker]

My brother in laws dad is just so nasfy. I've nsver done anything to him to deserve it, he used to be ok but he's just suddenly turne dlike this for no reason

[clampfan101]

I hope things get better, or at least easier soon.

[Asker]

Its baffling y they can't see how upset i was over it, last time. I stayed in my room because of him. And he's done the same again and yet if im. Nasty to them back im causing a scene

[clampfan101]

Have you talked to your family about this?

[Asker]

Yeah, they say im Just over reacting and im. Being annoying

[Asker]

My sister doesn't e even like him herself yet she shares no sympathy or will say anything

[clampfan101]

I’m sorry. I hope things improve soon.

[NostalgiaSenpi]

Welcome to life. Everyone is selfish in some manner and have conditions in what they expect.

[Jamie05rhs]

F them. They're assholes.

[noohair]

Details please?

[Asker]

Just general rudeness

[noohair]

I don't know, I have no information.

[Asker]

I dont know what else to say because thats all i can describe it as, i just dont get y people can't be nice to others