I found I was pregnant unexpectedly during the COVID lockdown to my boyfriend of 4 years. I wanted to keep the baby but my boyfriend really didn't want a baby right now due to a number of reasons. I agreed with him that now wasn't the right time and I had an abortion. I have found since then I have built up resentment towards him. Is this normal
I don't understand why are you still with him? Now that you've realised he talked you into doing something you did not want to do. You feel you killed your baby because he made you do so and now you're feeling guilty about it. So, it's normal to have built up resentment towards him, if I were you, I'd leave him.
I think you made the right choice. Countless studies have proven that children with both parents are more likely to be successful in life. I'm also a firm believer that the same-sex parent is crucial to the child's development. I think it's selfish to knowingly put your child at a disadvantage. A kid needs their father, especially if you had a boy. But you did have the final say...
How you the two of you would react to an unwanted pregnancy should have been discussed a long time ago. It's a big deal and now you know you aren't compatible. Perhaps it's time to end the relationship.
It's not unknown so in a sense, yes, is normal. But that doesn't mean it's fair on him.
You'll need to think through how you got here, decide if the reasoning and decision making, circumstance and context was appropriate. Either way, you'll need to find peace somehow.
It should have been your decision, not his.
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I've heard a number of women in your position express similar feelings. Abortions are such a messy thing. It really feels like the only thing men can do is support their woman's decision, because anything besides that will lead to resentment.
Your biological self is talking to you. For your biology... procreating is the whole purpose of your life... it doesn't care about the rent or if it's a good time.
I hope you don't feel guilty for it. I think this situation is best resolved with talking to him about how you feel and not holding it in.
The good girls avoid abortion trope, you likely feel like he pushed you to do a bad thing.
Well, that was your decision to make, not his. You can resent him for giving his opinion, but you ultimately made the decision, so to be fair you need to reserve some of that resentment for yourself.
It is normal because you feel like you were talked into something you really did not want to do.
Completely normal. I mean from your viewpoint he made you kill your baby. I'm surprised you're still with him tbh.
Yes it is and you’ll regret it the rest of your life
Break up. You’re welcome
But you made the decision.
For a woman? yeah. Is it rational? No.
What pter said
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