Traditional relationships are defined as relationships in which partners fulfill roles based upon their gender and stereotypical role expectations. traditional monogamous relationships, being in a relationship also means that a couple will be romantically and sexually exclusive
Non-traditional is anything besides that
I like to consider myself both traditional with a modern twist even at my church, and godly, fearing man leads provides. But that does not mean that a woman cannot work, or doesn’t provide for herself before the man even arrives you have to take care of yourself. Once I marry, it is a choice. We’re not in the age where we’re sitting in our parents house waiting for our parents to marry us off or a man comes with a fat animal and buys us.
I honestly don’t even believe in this day and age a traditional relationship such as the one describe works in this modern world. Both parents need to work. Children are expensive. Everything is expensive.
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10 mo
I guess the other question is do want to be traditional or prefer to be modern or both
Do you consider yourself traditional, or nontraditional when it comes to relationships?
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
10 mo
I consider myself traditional by the parameters you listed.
I agree with your assessment that this isn't the same world of say a 100 years. Ago. I always defend my position with women as when women entered the workforce they started competing with men for pay (and yes I acknowledge women still are paid on the avg. Less then men). But the point I'm trying to make is many women still expect men to make the same even though she is making it less possible for him to make that amount. Worse still, if a woman makes 50k she expects a man to make more, 100k. Anyone with any knowledge of economics can tell you this is not feasible.
I think we've come along way socially over the past 100 years. And the upheaval while in the end I think will be good it has been detrimental for dating. And I think this is going to get a whole lot worse still before it gets better.
I try to keep it simple. I believe in equality. I don't think ANYONE (man or woman) should expect another person to carry them. I think relationships are 100/100 not 50/50. I think people should always give 100% of what they're capable of. To do less is disrespectful to your partner. And you should understand who your partner is and know their goals and aspirations so you both are on the same page. I think when you marry someone in the modern sense and start building a family you do that with the goal of whatever benefits the family unit. Maybe the guy works more maybe the woman works more maybe the guy stays home with the kids maybe the woman stays home with the kids. When you've got a family your ego of your gender role needs to get shelved. Because the furthering of the family unit is what matters.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
10 mo
I'm mostly traditional. And I disagree with your statement that it doesn't work in the modern world. It doesn't work for some due to economic reasons, but it definitely works for those who can afford it. And many can. I personally know of many examples, and most of them are better for it, especially the children, but also the wife/mother and husband/father. The world would be a better place if more couples could afford it.
"I honestly don’t even believe in this day and age a traditional relationship such as the one describe works in this modern world. Both parents need to work. Children are expensive. Everything is expensive"
I didn't read the above as saying the same thing, but perhaps I misunderstood your message.
Whenever I think of traditional I think of the ideal 1950s relationship and mine is definitely not that. Honestly mine would probably be a mix of both. Both my significant other and I both work. At home I do most of the cleaning but we both do the cooking (more so him). He is also more of the provider and contributes a lot more in that department than I ever would be able to. If we ever had kids the responsibility would be both of ours though how that actually is will be figured out whenever that actually happens
In some ways we follow traditional gender roles, but in other ways we are far from traditional. Taking the best of tradition and improving on other areas that suit modern realities.
I'm very non traditional and unorthodox in my relationships with women. First and foremost, I always tell a woman when I meet her that she can just keep me sexually frustrated and only let me lick her feet and asshole, and lick her clean after she's had sex with other guys. Secondly, I often enjoy paying for her dates with other guys, and sometimes even doing various chores and tasks for the guy who's fucking her. Women have had me do their boyfriends laundry and wash his car and if I'm really lucky, sometimes they'll even grant me the privilege of pampering their feet, giving them both pedicures and foot massages, etc.
I was a non-traditional type of guy. Growing up, I had to take care of a lot of responsibilities. Both of my parents worked and we didn't have much money. I had to take care of my siblings, brother, and sister. I didn't even have much of a childhood, only work responsibilities and study.
So I had to learn cooking, cleaning and managing the house from such a young age and now I am probably good at them than most girls. I can cook better than most chefs.
However, from my personal experience, women don't like someone like me. They consider girly. Female friends made fun of me seeing me on the apron for cooking at a college party. I never had a girlfriend so far (27).
Once I got close to a girl at university. She actually came for food many times, she was very sick and I took care of her too. We were living out of state and she's from the same town as mine. But she wanted a more established, sporty type of man, not someone like me. She made it clear, "Guys like you are only good after thirty".
I am a grad student at a very reputed university and don't make money as per other guys of my age and that too is a huge turn-off and dealbreaker for the majority of the women.
I don't know about the future but I have realized women actually don't wanna date non-traditional men while they are young. Bad boys generally get countless women as they are traditional, they just focus on money and fun and let women take the nurturing side.
I find the traditional role fits me well, I enjoy all the activities that come along with it; I love cleaning, I love cooking, I love supporting my partner in any way I can - but I refuse to be the only one doing such things and I'll refuse to be with someone who expects me to do all that.
I prefer working - because I love working, I love being independent but my late fiance and I had agreed that I'd be a stay at home mom for 3 years - since we found that most fitting for us as a family.
For me it's about fitting into the dynamics, circumstances and roles of MY current relationship - however that might look like.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
10 mo
Yes I suppose. Currently like you describe but eventually I will start work when my youngest goes to school. Its not even that I would need to work, we own our own home and he makes good money and we are avid savers and frugal with money it's just when the kids won't be hear what the hell would I do all day? I mean I can generally keep on top of the housework easily with some organisation 2 hours per day. At the minute I have so much time on my hands sometimes that I can actually masturbate.
I'm a traditionalist in everything I do. Traditional gender roles, traditional clothing, traditional lifestyle, traditional upbringing, traditional views etc. But the way I was brought up, the man helps around the house and doesn't let the woman do all the work.
It annoys me when people think "traditional" means the woman does the housework by herself. In agricultural areas that was never the case. All members of the family helped eachother out to get the work done. Otherwise, nothing would get done in time. My parents helped eachother, my grandparents helped eachother, my great-grandparents helped eachother. They were all traditional.
Definitely more non traditional but I am definitely an exclusive kind of person, I couldn’t be in a relationship where my partner was romantic or sexual with someone else.
I like to work as well as him, we don’t want kids (for now anyway), I like to split the chores and cooking etc. We are both totally supportive of each other, non controlling and see each other as equals
Much more traditional than not. But not because it's traditional or stereotypical, but because it's something deeper.
Both parents do not need to work if you don't live in the city. Those are the places where it is more expensive. It's actually historically a very new phenomenon. Only a few decades-old, in fact.
I always thought I could be in a traditional relationship. But I had a small taste of that recently and it scared the crap out of me. Made me feel like I was going to be doing all the work. His requests and expectations were wild. It made me realize I don't think I can do this. So I'm going to stick to a modern type of relationship where responsibilities around the house are shared as well as we help each other out.
I would currently say rather non-traditional but still in a monogamous exclusive way. I just don´t see myself as the only provider and the only one working coming from a quite progressive area. I would consider my values that traditional but that´s all.
i think of myself as traditional because i'm girly and i like all the girly things but i would have to say non-traditional because i mostly have friends with benefits, though i have a boyfriend right now
As we apparently live in a century where terminology is redefined...
I pretty much dare to challenge your 'definition' of ''traditional'' :)
I am clearly non-conventional, but as some kind of post-Hippie I do have (our, or my own) traditions.
So my answer must be: '' yes I do, but I don't''
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Anonymous
(25-29)
10 mo
Funny story about this:
I asked my girlfriend this exact same question when we first started dating because I was trying to figure out what kind of date I should take her on. You know, a fancy dinner where we get dressed up, or just hit a drive through and take a cruise up the mountain?
Long story short, she got mad because she thought I was calling her cheap
At the same time, my non-traditional ways hardly correlate with what this modern world is about. The stuff a lot of them are into disgusts me. I’m certainly my own person
I'm definitely non-traditional. I believe in a committed long-term monogamous Friends With Benefits relationship. With a marriage license. And romance.
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