When it comes to understanding what men want from relationships do you believe women are mostly delusional or dishonest?

[Vegasrunner]

in my opinion it's a combination of both, society in general hides male standards from women, but there are some that have received evidence but refuse to accept it.

[Alli39]

I mean, I guess it depends on the individuals. I'd say being able to understand what the other person wants out of a relationship is actually a mark of healthy communication and a solid relationship in general. People don't inherently understand each other and what individuals want can vary pretty dramatically depending on personality, life state, preferences, etc. So basically, regardless of gender, if you're asking and listening then you probably have a good idea of what the other person wants as long as they're being honest.

I definitely wouldn't say women are delusional or dishonest about what men want (though I'm not sure how much stock you'll put in my opinion on that as a woman).

But for a bit of a check, here's what I've heard from guys irl about what they want: One dude said a good relationship was like "best friend plus", emotionally intimate, supportive, and fun, but like, with sexual attraction added to the mix. Another told me he just wanted someone he could be honest and have fun with. Someone who he could relax around and not "drain his social battery". In terms of what guys have found attractive it could be anything from a "sexy body" (specifics change depending on the person) to a cute appearance to kindness/sense of humor/generally good personality, to specific things like a long hair, thin, good skin, etc (again, specific things depend on who's talking). Basically, I think men mostly want what I'm pretty sure women want: Some who makes them feel happy and relaxed, who they can trust, and who they feel some degree of physical attraction to. If that doesn't match your experience feel free to refute, but that's what I've heard and seen from singles and from couples.

[Vegasrunner]

@Alli39 My question is are women delusional or dishonest? in my opinion most men all agree that women don't know what men want my question is about why.

[Alli39]

Well my answer is neither. Not knowing what someone else wants doesn't make someone delusional or dishonest. And frankly, if someone isn't clear on what you want, there's a good chance it's because you haven't communicated clearly enough on it.

[Vegasrunner]

@Alli39 Not knowing makes them ignorant, but I decided to use delusional instead. The dishonest part refers to the woman who understand but pretend not to. Doesn't sound like you understand the question, I'm asking if they are delusion or being dishonest. Someone being "unclear" Doesn't have a place in the conversation because the question implies that the person is clear.

[Alli39]

I mean ignorant implies the expectation that someone should know something that they don't, while delusional implies a refusal to acknowledge a known truth. How is knowing precisely want half the global population wants a clear expectation? Women don't know what men want because there are several billion men on the planet and they don't all want the same thing.

[Vegasrunner]

@Alli39 The dictionary defonition of ignorant is uninformed, lacking knowledge or awareness which I could make the argument that some women are, I used delusional more for alliteration purposes, however you could easily make the argument that some women know but refuse to acknowledge what men want which would be similar to them just being dishonest. So your question which actually is a good one is moot because u have your definition confused. Also your premise is flawed, the belief that you need to know "all" is a strange one that doesn't have any validity in society. All is not a prerequisite for understanding. All people don't vote on elected officials yet they still get elected. in my opinion people using that metric are simply low IQ individuals attempting to deflect from the fact that are unable to articulate an educational answer.

[Alli39]

I mean, you seem to be implying that women should know what men want, because if they don't then they're in denial or something, which is inherently untrue. My point was that "what men want" isn't necessarily a single thing/set of things and varies by individual, so of course women collectively don't know what they want. There's not a singular answer. Even a correct answer would be incorrect with respect to someone. Not being able to have the singular correct answer to a question that doesn't have an objective answer doesn't make someone delusional, ignorant, or dishonest. In fact, it doesn't say much of anything about a person.

Basically, your question is inherently flawed because it relies on a false dichotomy.
(Also, you meant "an educated answer", not an "educational" one...)

[Vegasrunner]

@Alli39 You're spending more time attempting to frame the question into something palatable for you vs simply answering it at face value. I'm not "implying" anything. I'm asking a direct question do you believe women are delusional or dishonest? That point that you keep trying to make isn't based on anything I've said. What men want from women has been articulated on millions of platforms throughout the history of the world much like your all statement your focusing on the most extreme part of the statement simply to be argumentative. If you line up 1000 men 995 are going to want same thing from a woman, society understands this why are u struggling so much w/ it. There's a reason why there are more female strip clubs than male, there's a reason why men make up 90% of the porn customer base and 90% of the johns in the world. Ironically you're kinda proving my point. Either you're delusional in believing in the complexity of what men want from women or you're simply being dishonest.

[Alli39]

I'm going to accept this as one of those "no point in arguing" situations. You clearly have a preconceived opinion and I don't enjoy arguing enough to bother continuing when we don't even agree on the basic premises of this conversation. I've made my stance clear. Have a good day

[Vegasrunner]

@Alli39 Accept what u like, again I asked a straightforward question, one that any intelligent articulate person would be able tp respond to. As I mentioned you're helping prove my statement as you're attempting to pretend you don't know what men want from women.

[Anonymous]

I think (assuming I’m not misunderstanding the question) it comes down to personal experience. A woman who’s had nothing but terrible relationships, whether with men she dated or even with her own father, may start to expect terrible behavior from other men. Most women I’ve known who say things like “Men are only interested in sex” have had relationships where that was all it led to. Did they expect that going into the relationship? I don’t know…
But I would hope that any person entering a relationship would voice what they want.

[Vegasrunner]

@anonymous Interesting perspective, I would argue that most men are only interested in sex, however for men that have access to sex require more and most women don't deal w/ that level of man rather desire them.

[ProbablyClueless]

I'm not really a fan of the alternatives you've given us. I don't think most women are maliciously ignorant about what men want. I think most women are just genuinely clueless about what men want, and they aren't really comfortable talking with men about it because a lot of them think men are super controlling, so they consult other women who are similarly clueless.

[Vegasrunner]

@ProbablyClueless I think you mean choices. I like your use of ignorant because that's what I originally was going to use but I went w/ delusional for alliteration purposes. There's a lot of validity in your response. I would add that
1) Just because they "think" men are controlling doesn't make it true.
2) They tend to go to women because women are more likely to tell them what they want to hear.

[nolabels]

Your question requires some reading between the lines in order to be understood by me, but if I follow you correctly, I'd say both delusion and dishonesty, but I believe that many women self-rationalize their motivations in order to live with themselves.

The same can said of men.

The world in which we live is a complex one.

[Vegasrunner]

@nolabels in my opinion it's not possible for men because men will be hit w/ reality. For example if a guy is broke, fat and unsuccessful he may think he deserves a 10 but his friends and society are going to quickly humble him about the reality of that. I

[EricSummer]

Men are not so complicated. I think many women have a relatively good understanding of what men want.

Occasionally, a woman may be prone to the delusion that a man truly cares for her when he is just looking for easy sex. Of course, many men are actually ready for long-term commitment so it can be difficult to tell apart. l, especially when the guy is lying about his motivations.

[Vegasrunner]

@ericsummer So you're saying they're being dishonest?

[EricSummer]

I meant in dating men are often dishonest about their motivations. Women may sometimes believe those lies and be deluded.

[Vegasrunner]

@ericsummer I could see that, however men are "dishonest" about their motivations because women can't handle honesty. Also your statement once again takes responsibility off women and attempts to blame men for women's failures. Two options were presented yet somehow you've found a way to include men into the equation. in my opinion statements like those are what leads more to women's delusions.

[EricSummer]

The question has been answered. Women are rather delusional than dishonest, but many are neither when it comes to what men want from a relationship. The point on male dishonesty was just to provide additional perspective.

I think if both are honestly looking for a committed relationship in which they can love and be loved then there is no reason to lie. They can spend time together and allow themselves to get attached to each other.

I realize you have a more negative view on these things, but once you are a father of a daughter it's almost physically impossible to hold such views, even already when you have a sister (I have both).

[Vegasrunner]

@ericsummer Thank you for sharing this. So you're not so much interested in providing an honest opinion rather something that justifies your family status. Personally I don't hold a negative or positive view about this subject rather an honest one. I simply like to point out that how even in a question designed to discuss female behavior someone still finds a way to blame men. I guess based on that your answer of women being delusional is probably validates by your statement.

[FunkyMonkee]

What I want in a relationship is honesty, loyalty and someone to love, hopefully for at least the rest of MY life!!! So far, most women only want guys that beat the fuck out of them, guys with lots of money and the chance to fuck any stray dick that happens along!

[Anonymous]

No. I just think most women simply do not care what men want. What a man thinks to a woman typically only comes into play in how it pertains to her. How he's attracted to her, how she gets him to fall in love with her, how she gets him to ask her to marry him. Most women don't want to try to understand men. Only control them.

[Anonymous]

They say social media has given them a false view of their worth and the aspirations they should expect.

I suspect many from single parent family's and other situations where a man figure did not feature strongly have no idea what a man is and what their worth is.

[inhua]

besides the basics of sex and looking good, there's not much they understand or even try to understand without attempting to shame men somehow

[Nikki1989]

Seek some therapy. You have some serious issues.

[DextroShade]

It's delusion and entitlement, both of which are at sky high levels in modern women.

[CB-Raido-Time]

Try selfish dishonest and controlling add narcissist.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand what you’re asking

[Vegasrunner]

@anonymous I'm asking do you believe that women general don't understand what men want or they understand but attempt to be dishonest about it.

[Dysney1023]

🦈you need help