Agree or Disagree: If You Stay With Someone Who Cheats, You Obviously Have No Self-Respect?

[coachTanthony]

Agree

Disagree

[dynamicyandere]

If someone stays with someone after being cheated on, they’re taking on an enormous risk of it occurring again. Since, they aren’t enforcing any boundaries but instead enabling unacceptable behavior.



As for lack of self-respect, I’d say in most cases it’s probably linked to that, thinking that they don’t deserve any better and that it’s acceptable to be treated like that.


However, it could also be that they DO believe it’s unacceptable but they are wishfully thinking that their partner will change and that this would be the very last time and that everything can be the same again.


But it’ll never be the same again, so if they think that it will, then they’re looking at things with rose-tinted glasses. The relationship will be irrevocably changed and nothing will ever be the same. If they stay together, it’s something that they will have to accept. Nothing will ever be the same.


Another factor could be kids. Staying together may be what they want to do in order to create a stable environment for their kids. Since divorce almost always have a negative affect of child development — unless the marriage was highly dysfunctional.


Generally speaking though, yes. I believe that in most cases, people don’t walk away because they lack the self-respect to do so.

[dynamicyandere]

Since divorce almost always has a negative affect on child development*

[dynamicyandere]

DizzyDesii makes a good point as well about how it COULD also not necessarily be lack of self-respect. It could just be that their mind isn’t going there. It’s not a thinking decision but a feeling decision that is overpowering and overwriting their logic and causing them to stay because their emotions compel them to do so.

[johnnydeeeep]

I think almost always the actual truth is more complicated, however typically behaviors exist within patterns, and therefore it is unreasonable to reasonably presume it won't happen again regardless of how remorseful or self-aware someone is, unless you know of a cause that would prompt an isolated incident accordingly and are confident in your assessment. Additionally, there are the exceptions to every rule, thereby refuting the plausibility that anyone whom stays with someone that cheated on them is without self-respect.

I would actually suggest that struggling with self-respect may be familiar to you if observing someone you perceive is without it stirs you the way it clearly does.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

There’s no worse thing you can do your loved one, betrayal is the worst you can do.

And It’s impossible to stay same after you violate the trust.

[Luopio27]

I agree.

[monorprise]

That kind of depends on what exactly they did to "violate your trust" a great many women are have set such high standards that a man merely saying the wrong thing at the wrong time to them counts as betrayal.
Relationships require a certain willingness to understand and forgive or they will never work.

So what is the logical justification for wherever you put the bar?

The woman who is 'betrayed' by mere words claims a trustworthy man would never even think to say such a thing. Which frankly is more a reflection of her own narrow-mindedness, and arrogance as to the meaning of any action. Likewise a man who occasionally sleeps with other women can have a logical argument for that being ok and not undermining his comment to the woman he is married to.

This unfortunate habit after all being accepted among men for thousands of years who nonetheless remained valuable and faithful husbands. In a culture which recognized no obligation to the women to whom he was not married. So if the line is there what is the logical reason for it?

So tell me what act is worth throwing away everything else in the relationships for, and why?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Unless you get ten million out of it, then it’s okay right👀 😂

[coachTanthony]

No it's never okay. That is a horrible reason.

[Bricealan]

@Brainsbeforebeauty If I got 10,000 I would go with it! Never mind the 10 million

[coachTanthony]

@Bricealan They could have an STD so there is no amount of money that would be worth it. Even if you took a test lol

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Well gee now you using my reply 😅😂🤣

[coachTanthony]

Ha Ha Ha You know I am hehehehehe

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Better go get tested 😁😂🤣

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I don't know, that's a lot of dough 😂

[coachTanthony]

@Telekinetic-Potato Not worth that STD even if the test does come back negative. Don't do it.

[IslaTheWitch]

It depends.

I can imagine many, not black/white, scenarios.

The easiest is that the cheating side says openly about not loving their partner. Then, of course, I agree.

More complicated is that there is a feeling, but somehow, intimate life is not satisfying for a cheating person. Then, it, of course, depends on whether partners are honest. If not cheating person agrees to an open relationship, then I have to disagree. But if not, then I agree.

Sometimes the feeling of love is so strong and overwhelming that nothing else matters. And then, who am I to share my opinion if I don't feel this emotion myself?

[sage2021]

Since the stakes are so high that almost all men cheat, shoot, we'd never have families. It is very rare that a guy doesn't cheat at some point and time in his life.

There are business men that have a beautiful, loving wife at home, and wonderful kids. Everyone is envious of them. Little do they know the Father has a boy he has sex with on the side. Happens all the time.

[DubiousIntentions]

Well, I don't know about self-respect, but you are certainly a fool. Cheat on me once, shame on you. Cheat on me twice, shame on me! Don't ever let it get to the point where you shame yourself.

[Drewtate]

For men anyway. If she cheats she will do so again. When women cheat its because they don't respect you and are searching for a new man they view as better than you, monkey branching. If she cheats she belongs to the streets.

[DizzyDesii]

I think you can still have self respect but you’re allowing the stubbornness and “thinking with the heart” overpower thinking with the head/logic

[madhatters4]

i don't know if i'd say a lack of self respect. certainly in some cases that would be true but i think at times people are just hopeful for some reconciliation, naive, afraid to walk away something they are familiar with, etc.

but yes at times lack of self respect can be the the reason

[Unit1]

Did I bring this idea up to you just 5 hours ago or so?

[coachTanthony]

LOL no

[Unit1]

Well, my stance remains unchanged (from that 10 million freedom bucks question) regardless.

[coachTanthony]

Well some may not care about self respect and just care about the new Ferrari they are about to buy lol

[Unit1]

Right.
If my investments work out, i might get me a Ferrari. But that's gonna take much longer than having your bitch buy a Ferrari to compensate for the trouble. Or no, scratch that. No one gives a bitch 10 million dollars for one night sex session, so getting a Ferrari from profits from investments is actually faster. It is more likely that Andrew Tate tries to get laid with your girlfriend than your girlfriend receiving the 10 million dollar offer. 🤔

[coachTanthony]

Yes it's just a fun question that is not likely lol

[Unit1]

Copy that

[RingOfFire]

Yet another great question there Coach. I go with the consensus... there is really no reason for a person with self respect to stay with a cheater because it means their partner has deceived them and violated their trust in the most fundamental sense.

[FreyaRed]

If it's against declared rules beforehand, then yes. It's not only valid for cheating. When you break those rules, allow or enable disrespecting your rules by others, from reference point of your ego it's deprivation of your self-respect.

[OfMiceandMen]

I love how some people think they can make the person change.🙄

[Miristheiss]

Agree. You are a chump and you deserve all the misery coming your way.

[electromagnetic]

I don’t think that’s the case. I think they feel trapped or have no self control in what they can actually do for themselves.

[Bricealan]

I cut her loose the second time, I caught her bare ass naked in her apartment. Did not have a flight of stairs to throw her down, so I just left.

[DaisyM23]

i put agree, but there are also circumstances such as having children or being financially dependent on them that makes it not so black and white

[Joshydavid25]

🤔.. I mean for the most part I would agree, like if they were a habitual cheater, then yeah you definitely have no self respect.. But if they cheated, felt terrible, and wanted to get your trust again... Then I wouldn't say so..

[shades777]

Id stay because im a glutton for punishment lol, bur for real who are all these people bragging about being abused, its like the equivalent of a man bragging about going to jail for street cred

[Slim57]

I agree, why would you let anyone do that when they're most likely to just do it again

[JackCarter]

Someone who cheats never deserves a partner

[jimmy2]

My wife was like that but we had a 50/50 marriage 18 years bad and 18 years good

[exitseven]

Yes, cheating is something I could not tolerate