When I want to vent he says its "my problem to deal with"?

[Anonymous]

Does he need to be dumped

[caring__1]

Venting is a common behavior, and I understand some people believe they need to do so in order to reduce the pressure building inside. Unfortunately, the pattern can backfire, especially when we're talking about women venting to men. Men are conditioned to believe no one approaches them unless they are looking for something, therefore, they tend to provide fixes to these people. When a woman is venting, she doesn't want to hear fixes; she just wants to be heard. This can be very frustrating to guys, as they don't understand their role in this situation. They see it as not allowing them to fix, so not allowing them to be a man. This is even more frustrating for men when the same thing is vented multiple times, with no sign of the woman making any changes. It's like the 2-year-old who has discovered the power of pushing parents' buttons. No matter what you say, the 2-year-old responds with "But why?" You know this is an endless loop that will never move anywhere.

Your partner says it's your problem to deal with, because you are excluding him from the equation by choosing to vent. You don't want help from him, so all he hears is this is something you want to do on your own, yet never do anything about. He's tired of hearing the same complaints over and over, so he's putting it back on you and saying "Sh*t or get off the pot."

[OlderAndWiser]

Why would you phrase your question in terms of "what he needs" rather than what you want?

[Avicenna]

Don't do anything hasty, Are there underlying problems in the relationship?

[Asker]

he puts ALL responsibility on me, question is am I in the right expecting emotional support?

[Avicenna]

That's a fair expectation

[DannyUk2017]

He is "isolating you", and that is Not good! Because one day you could "explode", and it will be His Loss.

[ThrillSeeker01]

He needs to be dumped. The whole point of a relationship is to be able to connect with someone else and be able talk about your feelings to your SO.

[bededazzle]

it depends on some specifics not mentioned