My so call man in life told me tonight that what a man want is their wife to cook, clean, not talk, and give them sex when they want it, true?

Question

I  hate to believe that it is, we met as young teenagers, I promise things that I shouldn't have, I didn't know better.

dynamicyandere · Accepted Answer

If he’s deducing everything to sex, cooking, cleaning, and silence, sounds like he wants a loveless marriage that only serves his immediate wants and needs.

Guess what? Money can BUY all of those.

Sex, cooking, cleaning, and silence can all be available through money.

What makes a marriage special are the things that money can’t buy: Love, Loyalty, Intimacy, Connection, Companionship, Etc.

He doesn’t speak for all men.

Because any man that thinks love is important in a marriage, would definitely include love in their list of what a man wants.

And silence? Unless he just means he doesn’t want an argumentative wife (which no man wants), if he’s talking about silence in general, then where will the emotional intimacy be if you don’t communicate with each other?

Sex without connection? A wife isn’t a hooker.

It sounds like he’s parroting some statement from from a simpleton on some misogynistic podcast or something (which are running rampant online unfortunately).

molonski2 · Accepted Answer

It's a very simplistic view and not fair if she is also doing paid work , if she is a housewife it's basically true , although there is of course a lot more to the relationship than that

We all make promises we can keep when young , and I'd also suggest he is setting out to purposely make you angry , plus it's also part emotional abuse , as in putting you in your place.
You probably need to spice things up a lot , change tact , give him. a hard slap , and decide if you want this marriage to continue or not.

I think part of his comment is probably in jest , but it's not really that funny. Are you doing paid work yourself?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It’s true. Most men do prefer the wife to simply be a hooker/maid and not bother them with anything else. Most of the time these types of men did not have women in their childhood/adolescent years that were great examples (mothers, sisters, etc.). Men who actually respect women and see them as human beings are few and far between. It doesn’t help that a lot of women aren’t very bright - this doesn’t help our case in the battle against misogyny. This has been going on since the beginning of time though so there won’t be much progress on this until perhaps the next generation.

wiltingrosepetal · Accepted Answer

My idea of the male psyche is that they want to hang out with their friends for a night and return home to a comfortable bed and a loving lady to cuddle up to. In general, men just don't want drama. No stress, no nagging, no mind games. Just give him some stability and affection in his life.

I feel like he was tryna describe that drama-free dream but went too far with it. Obviously no one wants to spend their life with a mute robotic maid. But at the same time, he's not gonna want to wed a woman who wants to 'change him' 🙃

Apple1996 · Answer

It's gross that some men want a slave instead of a partner

coachTanthony · Answer

That is called true love lol

HawkPerception · Answer

Definitely not all men want that 😂 Only manipulative, thoughtless, and selfish men that think nothing but themselves and are probably dead inside.

I want a girl for a companion to sail through life with. A girl that I can talk to about anything, whether it's my fears, sadness, happiness, dreams & aspirations, and is always there by my side to laugh, cry, smile. Someone who's there through all the hardships and all happy moments, whether it's success and achievement or leisure and pleasure.

CaptainOverthink · Answer

That would  only  be true if the man only chose you for your looks. Because if he did, then what he felt was  infatuation and lust.  It takes  wisdom of introspection  to know the difference, so if you met as teens I don't blame either of you, though probably rushing ahead on  whims of emotion  is not wise nor smart. Now,  I'm not saying looks don't matter , for most men  it certainly does.  But taking ones time to discover who moves behind the scenes,  who someone actually is (even as they learn and change) is..  vital .  I get that if things move on too fast and all of a sudden there's  kids  in the picture, then sticking together to try and make it work is truly honorable because  kids should always come first.  The short awnser is ;  No .  There is much more to it than chores and sex. That's a shallow or old way of thinking.

SueShe · Answer

That is true in a number of African countries perhaps or in countries where women are still being "enslaved" by men.

However, in the US, I doubt that the majority of men would agree with most of those requests except for the sex/fornication. A woman must always be at the disposition of the guys when they want to copulate.

If your man is that kind of person, then you should seek a confrontation and if there is no consensus, then your only option is to leave him because he is de facto treating you as his own personal slave. If you don't do anything about the situation, you consent to being in a toxic relationship.

mandyfire98 · Answer

Some men just want a living sex doll that they can turn on and off. These type of "men" are narcissistic sociopathic shitheads that shouldn't be allowed in society. They're mentally broken and faulty.

KelseiGrammar · Answer

I'm kinda like a female chauvinist. I believe all that stuff too, minus the talking part. BUT... is this your husband or boyfriend? I'd never be like that with just a boyfriend. Not only that, it's he doing HIS part to earn that treatment? because it goes both ways. If we living like when women couldnt vote, you better be working 18 hour days, paying all the bills, buying everything down to my bra and panties and feminine products. Hope he's walking like he's talking

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

What sort of La-La Land is he living in? Because I'd love to be able to have the kind of life where me and the wife wake up, discuss what all we have to do, and then coordinate. Fulfill each other's to-do lists, have time at home to recuperate and prepare for the next morning, instruct the kids on what to do, address any concerns they have, be a nurturing family, and then maybe once in a while celebrate our achievements with sex if possible.

And yeah, I'd want to have a LOT of sex; but I'd realize that can only come secondary to everything else.

Sounds like all he wants is an escort. And that's... pathetic.

Lionman95 · Answer

True for him for sure. The issue is just that something you need to discuss with him or a therapist but not online. If you ask online you´ll get a couple hundred definition from a couple people and all of them might be valid but they don´t need to be good for you. The internet can´t give you an answer to that because there´s no absolute definition of a relationship model.
So you have to find a way to work things out with him and maybe a third party as a moderator to figure out whether there is a relationship model that works for the both of you. But social media can´t play that role.

Lliam · Answer

Jeeez. Sounds like he misses his mommy cleaning his room, doing his laundry and making his meals. Then all he needs is a hooker.
What a creep. He has no respect for women. He thinks you're really stupid.

Guys like that make me sick.

I'd tell that soulless dweeb to take a flying leap off the balcony. Don't even discuss it. Just tell him that you are incompatible.
He will never appreciate you. Your life will be miserable if you stay with him.

RingOfFire · Answer

Complicated answer. Most men do want the woman in their lives to lean towards domestic comforts like cooking, cleaning and enjoying sex often, and to enjoy that role just as most women like the companionship of a man who is a good provider and makes them feel protected and secure and enjoys his role in that regard. But if that is the ONLY focus of the relationship and it is the center of their connection, it is not fulfilling for either. So it isn't so much about what a man wants as it is about the quality of the relationship.

PaulEGon · Answer

If that is true, then I never want to be called a man. I settle for being a boy. I'm not going to lie I did enjoy sex with my girlfriends (I don't think I have to be afraid to admit that) but one thing I like just as much, (and one reason I'm happy to keep the best friends with benefits arrangement with my best friend that is a girl,) is talking afterwords. I loved to have good conversations with them. I'd hate to think I'd ever get to the point where all I want is them to do is cook, clean and give me sex.

LazerBean · Answer

It's sounds like he just wants a personal sex slave/maid from you, since he only wants your silent services. No, most men are not like that, only the broken ones.

pickles77 · Answer

Talking and communicating is very important it’s not all about sex or food at least in my life. Above all of those intimacy is the most important to me I want close connections and good conversation. I don’t view sex as something that you do in exchange for something else but as a natural extension of our intimacy. It’s something that should be done in love even if your just horny. Food is great I appreciate food but I also enjoy making my own because I know what my body likes but it’s also important to know that your partner won’t always be able to fulfill all of your ongoing desires so I find that having a
spiritual practice helps balance things out without putting too much pressure on each other

Fireguy17 · Answer

well, he may think that, but good luck with that.
I think I have a better chance of being pregnant with twins, getting struck by lightning, and winning the lottery all at the same time than he has of finding someone like that.
I prefer someone who is more of a partner than a so called "Stepford" wife.

shmeed · Answer

No, we do want those things (accept the no talking, but a woman does need to know when to bite her tongue) but I also want intimacy, touch, someone to talk about my day with, someone i can try to make happy, someone to go on adventures with. It's a 2 way street. I can be very selfish, but i think woman want the same things.

XXTruthfulOgrexx · Answer

He is spouting social media nonsense.

It is true most men prefer traditional relationships. However, they don't want a mindless drone and should want an actual partner and should be willing to split those household responsibilities.

He needs to grow the hell up.

sawno · Answer

Lol no, one of the best things for me in a relationship is her ability to hold a deep meaningful conversation. I love spending hours with her just chatting about something deep, playing a game or watching a show and of course sex and flirting.

So for her to just be a maid with benefits is so much less than the experiences a great relationship gives me.

DARKCLOUD1945X · Answer

I have a name for him, and it fits him like a glove... ASSHOLE. Sorry to say but he is not worth the shit he is stamped out of. That is not what a wife is for. I hope you're not planning to marry him with what he told you your life would be pure hell

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I can cook, but appreciate help when doing so. I don't want anyone but me cleaning my stuff, but she should clean her stuff, and I'd want a looooot of talking.
I wouldn't want arguing (or negativity in general) though, and both she and I would need to give sex whenever either of us wanted it. Also she would need to share my hobbies, talents, and interests.

love_conquers_lust · Answer

I’d want my wife to be able to cook and clean. I like that she knows how to feed herself, take care of herself, and survive. I’m competitive, so I bet I can do better. But it should be in good fun, I’m not trying to belittle my spouse.

I want our words to be meaningful. I respect women’s opinions, but that doesn’t default make them good opinions.

I’d want my spouse to want sex as much as I do.

So let’s dance.

Jackblue · Answer

Well, it is the difference between what one fantasizes about and what one expects in life. I think that what many women fantasize about is an incredibly handsome billionaire prince who always does what she wants, but most women know they are not going to get that. Men in turn fantasize about a totally submissive woman who looks attractive 24/7, but reasonable men don't expect it.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

I would tell him "goodbye"... but I'm the feisty one.

Anonymous · Answer

Some men don’t want a wife. They want a mommy.  Be wary of men who want to have sex with their mommies.

Billlewis · Answer

Some men are seeking that kind of arrangement, but many more aren't necessarily looking for something like that.

curious_gul · Answer

Definitely not true. Maybe him, but not all men,  except for sex ofc.

Showtime23red · Answer

Preferably all men would prefer those things, plus add getting woken up every morning with a blow job. But we men are rational and realize that woman don’t have it in them, so we settle for just a few of those items. I’m to the point that I only will require the blow job as a mandatory requirement.

ColHathi · Answer

Yes to three of those, but I'd want her to talk. I'd want her to be my partner in life ofc. My best friend. I'd wanna share my interests with her too.

Also, none of those three other things would be a requirement ofc ^^

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

No where's the respect, it's hard to believe that any guy that only sees maid work in a woman, is in love with that woman, sounds like he fell out of love in my opinion.

EmmaMary · Answer

Personally I would be telling your so-called man to go and take a running jump off a very high cliff.

JacobJordan · Answer

Very simplistic view minus all the smaller things that makes a marriage worthwhile but if you want to get real technical yeah. If you want to get into the details no.

pascal_climbs · Answer

Maybe he listened too much to the Taliban. In the western world that is 19th century bullshit.

Anonymous · Answer

If the woman agrees, that's fine. But you should clarify this before the wedding. I wouldn't mind being a housewife. But I'm single and have to go to work.

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

Well maybe he wants a christian as a wife and not a whore.

BourbonAndBacon · Answer

Then you have every right to tell him you want him to make 6 figures and have 6 pack abs

LiamJHayden · Answer

Sounds like he wants a servant, not a partner.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

You met as teens, have you been together ever since? Do you have kids?

Anonymous · Answer

I want a wife who is cooperative, agreeable (but not a robot), loyal, sexually compatible, cooks, someone I can laugh with and is the kind of woman who is a good female role model to our daughter should we have one.

Anonymous · Answer

Well if you do the opposite as a guy, the girls don't want it either. They will run for bad boys and happily perform those for them. Asking for traditional relationships is okay if the guy is making money for the family and the girl is not.

Guido · Answer

This is a man that wants to control you and have you do everything he wants. He is not a partner and it's time to send him packing.

Minahh · Answer

Well a good portion of them are like that it's up to you ladies to say fuck you bastard, live your life and find a man who will treat you like a queen

KrakenAttackin · Answer

No, men want actual partners, not slaves, and NOT combatants.

Anonymous · Answer

That's about as true as women just look at men as an accessory like thier jewelry.😆

Anonymous · Answer

No, marry me instead I will treat you like a queen

Anonymous · Answer

Except the sex part I disagree with everything you mentioned.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Not at all. I want her to talk.

Unit1 · Answer

He speaks only for himself obviously.

DarkLegacy · Answer

LMFAO. Yes quite right

DreamLife7 · Answer

You're 40 asking this question?

Rc2020 · Answer

True that

My so call man in life told me tonight that what a man want is their wife to cook, clean, not talk, and give them sex when they want it, true?

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My so call man in life told me tonight that what a man want is their wife to cook, clean, not talk, and give them sex when they want it, true?

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