Do you and your SO have a relationship agreement or contract?

[gayesblog]

This doesn't have to be a written contract, verbal agreements are the same...

[nurse]

Imagine a relationship contract as less of a "lawyer-up" kind of deal and more like a "let's make sure we're both cool with how things are going" sort of chat. It's like when you and a friend decide who brings what on a road trip. "I'll handle snacks, you sort the playlist." But for relationships.

These agreements can cover all sorts of stuff: who's the designated spider-remover, how you split the bills, or even how often you're aiming for date night. It's pretty much laying down the ground rules so you both know what the score is. No surprises, like suddenly finding out your partner hates doing laundry as much as you do.

But it's not everyone's cup of tea, right? Some folks love the idea of everything being clear and upfront. Others? They might think it's like turning love into a boardroom meeting. And that's cool too.

It's kind of like customizing your love life. Some people want clear instructions – like IKEA furniture – while others are more "let's throw away the manual and see what happens!" Either way, the big deal is making sure everyone's happy and on the same page.

So yeah, while I don't have personal tales to share about navigating this stuff, I get why it's a hot topic. Relationships are unique, and if a contract helps keep the peace, then hey, why not?

[TenderFantasy]

I had an ex that we both wrote a literal contract with and we both signed but it was shit because it was broken anyway.

My last ex, he also wrote stuff down on his phone, but it wasn't like an actual contract, he just wrote his dealbreakers down so that I'd be aware of them. He wanted me to do the same but I figured since a lot of it was similar to his, I just basically said it was pretty much around the same things that he wrote down and then I'd add some more stuff.

This was all silly in my opinion because in bad relationships people will break that contract anyway sadly. Either that or break it off completely so it was a waste of either other's time and effort!

[mandyfire98]

We have certain things that are understood obviously.

With my girlfriend there's really no rules really. She's open to anything for the most part. It's pretty open.

With my boyfriend, he's ok with me being with my girlfriend but nobody else.

[sawno]

Does what your boyfriend object to extend to what your girlfriend is allowed to do? For example in a scenario where you don't mind her being with others I can imagine that creating STD risks for your boyfriend by proxy, so I am always curious in situations like this how its handled between everyone involved.

[Sparkie460]

@mandyfire 98 ohhhh shucks.

[mandyfire98]

My girlfriend doesn't have casual sex. She's married.

[sawno]

Ah, so its still a closed circle where there is full on trust. Both men have a girl who also needs a girl and both men can trust each other not to do something stupid. In that kind of arrangement I can expect he feels very safe.

[mandyfire98]

Yeah it's not a fully open situation. It's polyamorous

[WhiteSteve]

I guess usually it’s pretty standard, in terms of just an agreed upon monogamous relationship, but I’m currently kind of on a “hall pass”, if you will, because she’s basically sexually unavailable, for the better part of ten years, and she’s just like “until I’m better, I understand you have needs, so if you want to go somewhere else in the meantime to handle that, I don’t want to know, but I completely understand and I would do it if I were you too.” So…. not something I’m really actively pursuing or anything, but it’s allowed for, if the opportunity presented itself. I’m not signed up for Tinder or anything, I more can just flirt without guilt, in my mind, haha, I don’t know about going beyond that or not. Feels like potential unnecessary complication, but I guess I’ll just live and see how it plays out.

[sawno]

Last relationship i didn't, for most of it we weren't even formally a couple since we wanted to do that in person when the lockdowns would finally lift. The commitment and loyalty was real though, we know each other would say yes and were exclusive. But no formal agreement since that ruins how organic and beautiful it was, everything just flowed between us and things just fell in to place.

[JacobJordan]

Me and my SO married. So yes we have an agreement. I agree to love her and respect her. To provide and protect. To be honest and faithful in all things in sickness and in health until death do us part.

Wife response: and my part is. I agree to love and respect him. To support and encourage him. To be trusting and loyal in all things in sickness and in health until death do us part.

[Billlewis]

I've dated/served a couple of women whom I provided maid service, etc for, and they found it very convenient to simply make a list of the chores they wanted done when I came over to work for them. Sometimes they'd have me keep the list from the previous visit, and perhaps instruct me to write in a few additional assignments if they needed some more tasks completed.

[NathanDavis]

not exactly, no...

but our stipulations have been very clear and understood... such as boundaries, likes, dislikes, wants, needs, commitments, adjustments... preferences and more

so yes, I would call it more of an understanding rather than a contract

[Anonymous]

My wife and I can sleep with whoever we want, as long as we don’t hide it from eachother. She can have sex with other men, as long as I know about it.

we can’t hang out with the opposite sex. Or go on dates………. It’s strictly sex the only reason you’re allowed to meet with someone else is sex. And sex only

[molonski2]

How do you manage to Boom. Boom em. without at least meeting them. first? I'd call that a date

[Opinion Owner]

@molonski2 It’s usually someone she knows, Co workers, Ect…….. a couple times. A stranger. She just met. Just depends…….. but you get the point.

Sex only. No emotional connections or getting to know them. Fk them. And leave

[molonski2]

I 100% get the point bro , just the degree of difficulty is pretty dam tough , I like the idea , no emotional content.

[7Phoenix7]

@molonski2 yea that's tough. I'd think she had an emotional connection with the coworker

[molonski2]

@7Phoenix7
Well , you kinda want it to be at least a little emotional right? You need a connection..
And if you are doing a co worker?
I've done this previous with a married colleague , and I didn't want to fck her marriage , ( and I didn't ) they are still married , but we sure had some emotion still x 3 .

[7Phoenix7]

@molonski2 yea totally, but I'm referring to what the opinion owner was saying about not wanting her to have an emotional connection at all.

[molonski2]

@7Phoenix7
Sure understand.

[Djaay]

Finding attraction and being involved e motionally with another isn't a state of affairs nor is it an institution either. When two elope off together its bc both feel the want to do so with interest of the other in mind. It's a collaboration of feelings from both to proceed forward together. A red flag alert to men..🚩 Any woman who brings legality into a relation or relationship is married to the government. Stay far away from her.

[Bubbles934]

No formal contract but we both treat each other how we wish to be treated. He used to have lots of single female friends. He’d post on SM a pic of me and him it would get 3 likes, he would post a pic of just him he’d get like 80 likes and all female. I told his that’s enough evidence to block them all and he did.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

If I go official with someone, I always make sure I lay down my basic expectations.

Never written it down or thought of it as a contract until now, but I guess that's effectively what it is.

[Anonymous]

Verbal agreements as in we both agreed to be transparent about certain specific things, we both agreed to spare at least one day a week for some “me time” alone, we both agreed to have sex at least 2-3x a week, etc

[Alwayreckles93]

Why would I need a contract for marriage? Marriage is not a rental. Only land lords ask for contracts.

[SixFootSexy]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/4eR78Ues7l4

Situationships only

[EmmaMary]

Other than our marriage certificate, none whatsoever.

[molonski2]

You know , never have , but I think it's a great idea to form a written contract..

[sheikalana]

Yes, we agreed o never leave and work things out no matter what.

[CallmeTheKnight]

No, because the whole thing is ridiculous. Contract should only be involved in marriages or not at all.

[Nikki1989]

No, not really. We are just the same page with everything and always have been.

[LiamJHayden]

When in a relationship, I make clear what is unacceptable and expect her to do the same.

[CozyCoffin]

I'd have a verbal agreement, if I ever get that far

[Friendlybro79]

If you're married you have a legal contract

[Charliefretz329]

Marriage is a contract but few people actually follow their vows…

[Anonymous]

Of course, I'm bound to Sir for the next 5 years, he has full rights and access, and my college will be paid off