If love between a man and woman isn't real why bother? It IS NOT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE?

[hardboiledink]

Girls are loyal to their emotions, and they only "love" a guy conditionally, NOT unconditionally like if he was mean all the time, broke, or just had a lot of bad days. Meanwhile, guys do everything for women who want more and are never satisifed. At the least, it seems men are more loving than women. BUT either way, it seems in general that relationships are tit for tat, games, all just for trading things each other wants, and that IS NOT unconditional love. It's all based on conditions like someone wants respect, money, sex, time, care, humor, kids, a house, car, etc, etc, and if someone fails enough at giving it then the relationship is over. THAT IS NOT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, so why bother even getting into FAKE relationships that are some point are bound to fail?

[Vesuvius87]

You can't have unconditional love within romantic love. Men do many things for women that actually are worth the effort and things have to be recriprocal. If there needs to be some level of attraction, communication, compatibility, mutual respect and stability those are already conditions. Imagine appearing a total mess on the first date or totally drunk or being drunk many times during the relationship? There wouldn't be another date and the relationships goes downhilll by then.

Do you really think unconditional love in a relationship is declaring ''I love you'' and fantasizing about them (being madly in love with them) 24/7? That's not even love. That's being infatuated. Let me try to eliminate sex from the relationship and see how long a romantic partner will last without it? Not so much unconditional isn't it?

The only thing closest to unconditional love is the love a mother or father has towards his/her child but not in all cases. Certain parents disown their children for several reasons (I once read about a father disowning his daughter for hiding the mother's affair) so they're not unconditional either.

The only way you can truly love unconditionally is the following:

- If there an offense (any) they can commit that will make you never want to speak to them ever again, block or disown them? If the answer is yes then NO, your love is conditional.

- If the answer is no and you'll still be there for them no matter what (even if they plotted against you), still speak to them then your love is unconditional.

Unconditional to me nevers never blocking them, never disowning them no matter what, being there for them till the very end, no matter what they do.

[DishLady]

So the one guaranteed unconditional love is the love a child has for its guardian. Everything else is subject to questioning because we’re not BORN INTO that relationship but GROW INTO it, so there are gaps, adjustments, etc.

[hardboiledink]

Yes, how rare do you think it is in relationships? Because it seems to be a VERY low number of couples who actually unconditionally love eachother as most marriages fail.

Also I think that, FANTASY and BS story is one sold by Hollywood, and it is the pain of a lot of broken people who are blindly and WRONGLY looking for unconditional love outside of themselves/family and in another person, YET is it wrong to want that and are relationships just good for tit for tat?

[DishLady]

But it’s never guaranteed in a relationship bc the whole thing from the start is about compromise… which is at least particularly conditional from the beginning.

[hardboiledink]

Yes, compromise id conditional, and relationships do start with that, NOT, unconditional love. Good point

[DishLady]

It’s a great qt — people ask all the time and it’s really limited to how we meet people. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[hardboiledink]

Yes, those that meet when kids and younger can have that unconditional love for eachother easier than 2 people in the now superficial, narcisistic, and kinda tit for tat dating world where everyone wants more than their actual value and really don't want to give up or compromise on much. I keep meeting girls who want their own separate house regardless of if they would want marriage or not, it's crazy out there

[DishLady]

Exactly. (Or been two kids with feelings for each other and no emotional/relationship baggage… it’s hard to be completely unconditional…. We all grow and need different things out of life, so on the relationship we then have to be more vigilant and attentive to one another to protect the flame of our love and keep it alive and shining brightly for a lifetime… It’s possible, just challenging.

[Finchie40]

Sadly trying to find true love these days is hard to come by , Some people just settle with someone thinking it’s the right thing to do , when really it isn’t , they are pretty much grasping onto someone , that isn’t really grasping on to them the same way , they just like the convenience of them , but they truly don’t love them , For true love to exist both partners have to choose each other , no matter what obstacles come their way , Making each other your top priority , over everyone else in this world , sadly
Most people can not do this , because every single one of us has selfishness inside of ourselves , wanting things to go our own way , if we don’t get what we were after , than we have a choice, we can choose to stay with our partner or choose to walk away. If you truly loved your partner? You wouldn’t be walking away period. If someone walks away from you , let them go , because if they truly loved you , they wouldn’t be walking away period

[imtiaz45]

Love between a man and a woman can be very real and deeply meaningful, even if it isn't always unconditional. While unconditional love is an ideal, romantic love often involves conditions based on mutual respect, trust, and shared values. These conditions don't diminish the love but rather strengthen the relationship by ensuring both partners feel valued and supported. Love is worth the effort because it enriches our lives, brings joy, and fosters personal growth. Even with its challenges, the connection, companionship, and shared experiences make the journey of love incredibly rewarding.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/9238O1IqD4A

[AI Opinion]

Ah, diving deep into the ocean of love and its conditions, aren't we? Let's splash around a bit! True, the idea of unconditional love does hold a romantic charm, doesn't it? But here's the kicker—unconditional love isn’t about enduring meanness or accepting neglect. That's not love; that's a one-way ticket to heartache city!

Now, onto the debate of men vs. women in the love department—both have the capacity to love deeply and yes, both can be conditional. It's less about gender and more about humans being, well, human. We’re all riding the emotional rollercoaster, looking for someone who can strap in beside us and enjoy the ride, ups and downs included.

Why bother, you ask? Because even if relationships require work, negotiation, and a bit of give and take, they offer us moments of pure magic—those heart-skipping, butterfly-churning moments that make all the "conditions" worthwhile. Plus, navigating through the conditions helps us grow, learn more about ourselves, and what we truly value in a partner.

So here's to finding love that feels less like a transaction and more like the adventure of a lifetime! 🚀 Love, after all, is about finding someone whose company you adore, who challenges and supports you, and with whom you can navigate life's trials and triumphs. And hey, if you're both laughing together more often than not, I'd say you're winning at love. 💖

[hardboiledink]

GREAT answer thanks

[ohsheeT]

You don't have to be in a relationship to love somebody unconditionally

[RespectfulGuy]

There are a few kinds of love, of which only romantic love is sexual.

For example, family love aka blood relations is no sexual, and in many cases unconditional. Think about the unconditional love from a mother to her children.

Another example is platonic friendship. While many are disappointed, some do find lifelong friendship. These are relationship that are non-sexual and could be unconditional.

And in context, your question seems to talk about romantic relationship. And many couples began as childhood friends. And perhaps even attend the same church or religious institution. Worldwide in many forums, you may find such couples. They know each other as friends, then become romantically involved, married and have kids, still together.

These are examples of unconditional love. While all are not perfect, they make their relationship worth living for. And through it, they are contented with life.

[mobiusforniner]

A man “doing everything” to please a woman isn’t sacrificing because at heart he has something he wants from her. Usually a trip to pound town; after which his sacrificing quickly stops. Does he really love her unconditionally?

if one loves on condition, regardless whether that person is a man or woman; they have not learned to love at all

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Nothing, and I mean nothing is unconditional in the current social dynamic revolving around dating or relationships.

It is one of the biggest reasons why I only date casually and refuse to enter into a long term commitment of any type.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Truly unconditional love isn't healthy, it's codependence. When your SO starts turning tricks for hits of crack, comes home violent and drowns your infant, nobody is going to whine about "but what about unconditional love?"

[DextroShade]

Unconditional love is only for pets and children. Understand this and move accordingly.

[hardboiledink]

THanks, yes. Men are treated like $hit by women and the world

[jahaims]

No one has ever loved me so it must not be real waaaaaah.

[mobiusforniner]

So many whiny little pusscakes on this website

[Razp_Sorbet]

Love is always conditional. Usually conditional on faithfulness and respect.

[genericname85]

is your argument that "conditional love" is "not real love"?

[hardboiledink]

Bascially, yes. It is TRANSACTIONAL isn't it? And in that case you might as well have a business partner and break out contracts

[genericname85]

well i think the only person in your life you should EVER love "unconditionally" is your child. everyone else SHOULD have conditions to you giving them love.

like for example you want your girlfriend to not fuck another guy right? so that's a condition. and i think it's very wise to have that condition and probably a few more than that xD

[genericname85]

like yes love "should" be transactional in my opinion. it's not like you just give and they just take right? it's a giving and taking. there should be balance.

[Twalli]

Not all relationships fail and humans can't feel unconditional love.

[Zbrody1997]

Your war isn’t with women it’s with feminism.

[KrakenAttackin]

@Zbrody1997 Unfortunately, women are the engine of Feminism.

[Zbrody1997]

Democrats are the reason, trad women still exist

[Zbrody1997]

I meant to separate that with a period and not a comma but surly you get what i mean