Should relationships give you anxiety?

[Anonymous]

For me, the thought of being in one gives me a lot of anxiety. I don’t know how y’all make it look so easy.

[Yannae]

No, it should be the opposite. My relationship doesn't feel tiresome and easy because I picked the right girl. We said that we were interested but wouldn't just go for it and instead just feel out how the other person is.

We rarely have fights and if we argue it's without any yelling or cursing and it's resolved on the same day 9/10

[Arguydo]

I think movies spoiled it for us, at list in my case, thinking that you should feel love in a cinematographic way... Anyway, take it easy, a good relationship should start with a good friendship, start there and then let it happen, no pressure, be yourself. Ad if it doesn't work it wasn't meant to be. No anxiety should be involved.

[desidoll]

I felt that way before when I was with the wrong guy. There must be a reason behind your feeling or could be that you already have anxiety so it makes things worse. One thing I learned is to conquer my fear.

[Caroline91]

It looks easy when it is with the right person because with the right person it is easy! If it's full of anxiety you need to quit that relationship and move on.

[Sugar100]

I always feel anxiety with every guy I meet , I get no label but they treat me like a girlfriend and text me wana date me but it’s constant anxiety in my head of wen we’ll meet family, wen we’ll have pic together like couple? Wen they’ll go to a family party with me?

And it’s a horribel anxiety everyday 😓😓

[Caroline91]

@Sugar100 Are you that way about other things in your life, too?

[Sugar100]

No just with guys cuz I’m not a party girl I want finally at age 27 have my first ever boyfriend that spends time wtih my fmaily and all guys give me anxiety I will need be the one to ask for a label what are we? And that way dump them
Ealry on.

[Sugar100]

I’m not a club party girl that wants be free til I’m 30 . I want a boyfriend that meets family, I want have 3 baby boys it’s my biggest dream I have a religous family that are all married. I don't know y god is making it take way too long for me have my partner

[Caroline91]

@Sugar100 Well, I think things often happen when we take time to work on whatever needs working on in ourselves... We all have stuff... Sometimes just taking the intense focus off helps us relax and then life sends what we need our way. I wish the best for you!

[Sugar100]

I will need ask every guy that likes me what are we? In order to have a label as girlfriend. That’s the only thing I can do.

[Sugar100]

They will either say I won’t want a girlfriend or agree be my boyfriend. Most have said they don’t want a girlfriend. I jsut fear the guys I like will reject me and I’ll need comit to a guy I don’t like in order have a boyfriend but how will that be love and happiness? Makes no sense

[AI Opinion]

Diving into the world of relationships, aren't we? It's like learning to surf; exciting yet, oh boy, the waves can be intimidating! It's normal to feel a bit anxious at the thought of sharing your life with someone. It's that pre-first-date jitters on a grander scale. Think of it as the universe's way of saying, "Hey, this journey is going to be an epic one. Ready?" What you're experiencing isn't a red flag but a sign that you're venturing into something meaningful.

But imagine, with the right person, a relationship feels like coming home. The anxiety transforms into excitement, and the challenges become adventures you're eager to embark on together. Anxiety may start the journey, but it's the love, trust, and laughter that will define it. Keep your heart open, and remember, it's about finding someone who makes the butterflies in your stomach do a synchronized dance, not cause a storm. 🦋💕

[DrPepper12]

I've been told that if you have depression you're living in the past and if you have anxiety you're living in the future but you're not living now. I don't think you should have permanent or paralyzing anxiety but a little anxiety now and then is not a bad thing. You can't let it cripple the possibilities of the future though

[Booklover_90]

You’ve posted about this a lot. Did you experience some trauma in your life that now causes you to feel this way about relationships? I mean, sure. No relationship is not perfect, but you shouldn’t feel anxiety. That’s a sign of a deeper problem.

[Asker]

What would you consider as trauma? Because I don’t think I did.

[Booklover_90]

I don’t know your life so I don’t know what you’ve been through.

[ManInChains]

After my past experiences with relationships and even attempting to see where things would lead has given me so much anxiety it’s developed into a fear that has developed into hate. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[sawno]

It has its moments of course, but in general no. I was myself with her, had a ton of fun with her and we could both relax together.

[LaurenM1997]

No they shouldn’t you should be in a happy healthy relationship if you feel panicked at anytime of the relationship then it’s not for you

[Asker]

I’m a panicky person. My mind is my worst enemy. I could get along with almost everyone and have good relationships with them. But, my mind would turn on me and tell me I’m ruining everything with people I have a connection with.

[LaurenM1997]

I’m a panicky person too but I try not to let it get to me I block it out but then I’d go and talk to someone about it 😞

[DrPepper12]

@LaurenM1997. @Peridot25. Have you tried counseling or Rx?

[Asker]

@DrPepper12 No.

[DrPepper12]

WHY? It's so helpful!!!

[Asker]

@DrPepper12 Just for relationships? What are they going to do if I went to counseling?

[DrPepper12]

You get to air ideas, EXPLORE what ifs, yotu have a sounding board to be HOMYEST!!!

[LaurenM1997]

@DrPepper12 in the UK we have to pay for counselling and it costs a lot of money

[DrPepper12]

I don't know that! Wow!!

[LaurenM1997]

@DrPepper12 yeah its not fair they should make it free for the people who like myself that can’t afford it

[LaurenM1997]

I’ve just searched it up it says it’s £50-£80 per hour for therapy sessions smh 🤦‍♀️

[DrPepper12]

Wow! That's steep.

[LaurenM1997]

@DrPepper12 it sure is 😅

[Berethor]

Make sense to be little nervous about it if you had never been in a relationship before.

[Asker]

It’s more than nervous. I’m absolutely terrified because so many things could go wrong where the relationship would end badly.

[Berethor]

What could go wrong for example? what the things that terrify you about relationship?

[Asker]

Like I could do something that’s questionable that would make my partner rethink about our relationship where he wants to end it. Even though that was never my intention. I just have major anxiety and my worst fear is doing something wrong to at could cause my relationship.

[Asker]

*that could
I always try to be a good person to those I love but I have days where I wonder if I’m doing something bad where they don’t want me around anymore.

[Berethor]

I see, well as long as you not cheating I don't see what so wrong that you can do.

[DishLady]

Nope. When your guy starts nagging you too much it’s a sign you shouldn’t be with that person.

[handsomelad70]

Yes, because you should be trying to meet your partner's needs and desires as well as your own.

[Asker]

But cause you so much anxiety where you don’t feel good enough?

[DrPepper12]

No. Not at all you MUST maintain your own identity, however flawed or difficult in your mind, or else BIG TROUBLE!!

[Anonymous]

Don’t worry. I don’t think it will happen for you anyway. No need to be nervous.

[Asker]

And that’s ok. My mental health is on the line right now.

[Opinion Owner]

Well you called me batshit crazy so returning the energy.

It must suck to be back looking and unstable but hey. Men suck anyway

[Asker]

When do I call you batshit crazy? I’ve called many people that 😅

[Asker]

Also, I’m not too crazy. I just have anxiety.

[dudeinohio]

They only cause anxiety until you make the relationship official.

[Sugar100]

I have anxiety everyday as boys treat me like a. girlfriend but don’t give me label as a girlfriend and I’m wondering daily in my head wen we’ll meet family? Wen a guy will attend my family party with me next month? Can I even ask him? Is he even my boyfriend? I have horrible anxiety as then if I ask what are we I’ll be rejected and it’s not easy for me to like a million guys and want a relationship with any guy. It’s rare for me like a boy as a boyfriend.

[DrPepper12]

@Sugar100 you need to study Stoicism.

[LiamJHayden]

A good one should not, except maybe on rare occasions since no situation is perfect.

[MacDaddyRico]

Relationships aren't for everyone.
As similar as humans may look, we are a very complex animal, socio-biologically speaking.

[Kelly6]

@Peridot25 It all depends on partner

[jahaims]

No, they should bring you peace

[LEGENDARY4200]

Shouldn't just overthinking it all

[eagle1951]

they should not

[LazerBean]

Nope.

[ellefia]

No, not really