When is a good time to tell a boyfriend I'm not interested in having kids out of wedlock?

[Anonymous]

We've been dating for 1.5 year (but live separately; I actually prefer my house over his) and haven't really had a conversation about how to raise kids until he recently mentioned about having kids in a long-term relationship. I found this kind of offensive but didn't say much.

What if I'm not interested in bearing him any kids as just a girlfriend nor in doing this ''co-parenting'' new trend? I'm ok with a long-term relationship (if you're not ready for kids nor want any) and not into religion but having kids is something different to me. I actually would like to raise kids in a marriage, not in a relationship.

[CuriousHubby]

This is very hard and so disagree with the coparent! No different then divorced parents!

How serious is he about this baby thing? Is he saying it cause he wants kids or thinks you may want kids soon?

Talk with him and tell him how offended you are at the idea of coparents! If you can't have that talk then this will end soon after a fight. It's not strong probably more emotional or sex based.

Good luck these talks are hard even for married couples. My wife still cries when talking about kids.

Also creating them would be all on you and he would not be around to help!

[Anonymous]

Now is the best time. And thank you for believing as you do. Having a child outside of wedlock is very harmful to the child and to society.

[IslaTheWitch]

tell him, what you think and feel, but focus on your opinions, avoid "you always/you never"... it shouldn't be offensive

[AI Opinion]

Ah, love is in the air, and so is a big, important conversation! 🌹 It's fantastic that you've recognized your values early on. The best time to share your thoughts on big life decisions like having kids and marriage? Yesterday! But since time travel is out, let's aim for the next best time—ASAP. It's key in any relationship to be open and honest about your desires and boundaries, especially on something as life-changing as children. Approach the convo with love, explaining that your views on raising kids are tied to the concept of marriage, not just a relationship status. It's not about being offensive; it's about sharing your truth and finding a common path forward—if possible. Remember, it's a dialogue, not a monologue, so be ready to listen to his side too. Who knows? This might bring you two closer than ever, or it might reveal some deal-breakers. Either way, better to know now than later! 💖