Why do people have so many possessive and “crazy” partners?

[smahala1991]

At least around here that seems the case. Are people really that possessive over their partners to where they can’t even talk about trivial things with other people or even have anyone look at them?

[blueonblack22]

Some people mistake possessiveness with love. It’s not. It’s actually extreme (sometimes very dangerous) insecurity. The person acting this way is really more in love with themselves then their partner. It’s an ego gone berserk.

However I had a positive experience regarding that this evening. I’ve gotten into Kava bars recently and I took a seat this evening and got in a friendly conversation with a cute younger woman. Didn’t hit on her. Just being friendly.

Well her boyfriend came back and he said hello and asked me a (friendly) questions. I picked up on the jealousy vibe BUT he handled it well. He was accessing if I was a threat or not and started out being respectful to see how I would respond. I was cool with him and after some small talk walked away to sit somewhere else. He handled it the right way.

But that’s not always the case. I’ve had dudes get really douchey, jealous and defensive when I respectfully talked to their gfs having no idea they where taken. It would of been one thing if I was aggressively hitting on then but I wasn’t.

That’s insecurity when dudes act this way.

[Lionman95]

I would say because in western society there are two streams of influence: People want absolute freedom in their personal choice and how they live their life but at the same people are highly insecure.

Those together mixed give such a cocktail because people want absolute freedom they don´t like when a partner or someone else that they can´t do something as it might hurt the other person´s feelings. People want to be in a relationship and want the benefit of a relationship with the freedom of a single life. So they call everybody that disagrees with them crazy.

On the other hand people are highly insecure as they see everybody else an option that their partner could cheat with. So a guy doesn´t want a girl to show off her ass with a yoga pants or has issue when her skirt or dress is short as a woman might have issues when her boyfriend talks about how a great that female colleague is.

In short I would say people are not more possessive it just appears to be that way since people are more confused about social issues.

[Lionman95]

Thanks for the MHO.

[jennifer_bloom]

I believe these posts are troll posts made by jobless people who have a lot of spare time on their hands. Some create 8000 fake accounts to ask fake questions and give themselves best answer. These people are both mentally challenged and mentally ill and rely exclusively on their parents or sex partners for money.

[PeachyPie93]

People usually aren't that possessive about their partner unless they are insecure. But tbh I have always been annoyed seeing a guy who is supposed to love me checking out woman in front of me. Which will make me hurt him by doing it back but worse, if he is gonna annoy me I might as well annoy him too :P

[AI Opinion]

Diving into the deep end of relationships, it sounds like you've stumbled upon a curious trend of lovebombing evolving into a wildfire of possessiveness! Possessive and “crazy” partners often have their roots in insecurity and a fear of losing their connection, which, let's be real, can turn the most chill date into a full-on emotional rollercoaster. When folks get clingy, it's often because they're not just holding onto their partner; they're gripping onto their self-esteem for dear life. Imagine, it's like they see their partner as a mirror reflecting their worth, and goodness forbid if someone else casts their glance in that direction, right? It's a tough scene, but understanding and communication can turn those red flags into green lights for a healthier path ahead. Let's spread some love and reassurance, making sure everyone feels secure, both in themselves and in their relationships. 🚀💖

[HawkPerception]

Most people are attracted to traits that tend to correlate with those possessive and crazy traits. They don't know how to filter people and end up in toxic relationships as a result. The truth is, the majority of people in the world are not mature and if they come across as mature, it's likely a facade they've learned to put on in social scenarios.

On another note, I believe that people don't change at their core. They just learn to hide the negative traits in time.

[DishLady]

So many? I had ONE and learned my lesson.

[Razp_Sorbet]

Honestly I don't know why people get this way.

I had two ex's who were like this. While one was worse than the other their upbringings were entirely different. The one who was worse actually came from a more stable home. So I can't definitively out it down to upbringing. Probably more societal.

As for picking these guys to date. Unfortunately these signals didn't show until further into the relationship. It goes from him wrapping his arm tighter around you when another guy walks by to wanting all your social media passwords real fucking quick.

[JustinTheGreat]

I know couples like that. There was one couple who I used to work with and they were both equally as possessive and jealous.

She would get mad when our female coworkers would talk to him. Even if they were talking about something related to the job. And he would do the same to her.

one time there was a fire and we had to evacuate the building and he literally called her and stayed on the phone to make sure she wasn’t talking to the firemen lol.

some people like when their partners are possessive like that. I like it to an extent. Like my partner gets kinda jealous when someone else flirts with me. But he’s not gonna get mad if it’s just friendly conversation

[Anonymous]

Yes , because most of them just cheat on their partners with no remorse or regret.

I have been in 3 relationships and all of them cheated and it affected me so much so I'm possessive. I have no other way out. It's not easy to get over the fact that a person whom you pick to be a part of your future would just cheat on you just like that. I couldn't believe it. It took me A very long time to get over it.

[luvstoned4him]

Those partners either have undiagnosed mental issues or controlling and obsessive issues

[JSkye]

I had one of those once. Guy was abusive. I couldn't even think about looking at another guy, let alone talk to one. He controlled my life for a little over a year. It was traumatic in the extreme.

[ProbablyClueless]

I think it's because everybody makes the mistake of assuming that early-on possessiveness is just your partner being super interested in and valuing you.

That's one of those lessons you have to learn the hard way.

[alice55]

Guess there's just a lot of people who have this personality in the words currently is it the same where I live.

[DrPepper12]

Yes. They're nuts with this "My boyfriend was looking at poen and that's cheating", "my girlfriend has male friends and co-workers and that's not acceptable" totally controlling egotistical people

[NathanDavis]

not around my street...

how many are too many though?

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Sometimes people get themselves involved with them kind of people because they want a partner so bad.

[Richarding]

There are also those who are not partially possessive.

[Crazzyyworld]

I think people in internet are stuck ups. If they aren’t why would they be here? I am stuck in this website

[msc545]

Lots of people are very sensitive to the mere chance that they might get cheated on, since it is so prevalent.

[Fightersoul95]

I really can't stand this kind of people. Many of my past relationships didn't last long because of that. Being possessive is normal, while being obsessed can push your partner away from you.

[MyBrainsInsaneReign]

Because people are crazy and possessive.

All of us are crazy and weird and unstable.

[Yannae]

It makes you feel quite fortunate, doesn't it?

[jackieistired]

Love makes people act out of sorts I guess

[LiamJHayden]

A lot of people are insecure.

[Ladsin2]

If you're not jealous you don't care.

[FunkyMonkee]

Some are.