Hiii, Im going through “something” and I need to know your opinions on this or maybe if u ever experienced something similar?

[Anonymous]

Im going through “something” for almost 2 years now. So for a little bit of context (because i know for a fact this question will come along, and thats totally understandable) Me (20yrs) and my boyfriend (22yrs) are in a long commited relationship, everything sounds about right so far.

The problem begins with his MOM (another one of those stories) but this is a bit different because his mom is a very chill mother and i respect her with all my soul, except for this one thing.

So (as one does) at our age and after 2 years into the relationship, you want and need some intimacy. His mom doesn’t let me sleep over at their house, at first she told him that its only a matter of time and after some time together (this happened at the very begging) she wouldn’t mind it, IT PASSED 1 YEAR SINCE THEN.

At first it seemed that he cared about this thing and it’s just as frustrated as I am, but after some time he stopped standing up for ourselves.

She told him that “only on special occasions” we can sleep together (when she's at home, bcs when she isn’t she doesn’t care), special occasion “happend” all of a sudden she forgot about this talk.

It’s really frustrating because i like this woman with all my heart and soul and I feel like she doesn’t feel familiar with me, ok, understandable it would have been if i slept in the same bed with her, BUT IM NOT.

He got in many fights with her about this topic but nothing seemed to work. So my question is, can it be a “me” problem, or a “she” problem maybe something related to “her confort zone” or a “he” problem because he maybe should’ve stood up more? If you have similar stories or just want to share your opinions I am SOoo open, thank you. I really want to feel seen and heard! (moving isn’t possible, she doesn’t let him move)

[Anonymous]

For one it’s her house. Her house her rules. The son is old enough to have his own place as are you. So maybe you two should find a place of your own. Second maybe she’s not comfortable w it because you’re his girlfriend, not his wife. Sounds like she likes you, but something like this doesn’t indicate she hates you. Third, I don’t know his background as far as ethnicity, traditions, etc, but some families are like that. For example in my culture, it’s disrespectful to have a girl stay over at your in-laws as the girl, especially if they’re not married. In our tradition, I’m not saying my family disowns me or that other men are disowned by their family in our tradition, but once you get married you’re supposed to go w her, to her family’s side. You’re the man. You’re expected to take care of her as well as help w her family. Some stuff has changed somewhat, especially if the family doesn’t have boys. But like w my sisters. Their husbands spend more time at my mom’s house helping w things such as chopping wood, planting, etc. So it may be something like that.

[Asker]

Yeah, right thats the thing, for 2 years i was trying to understand her point and go with “her house her rules” but if “her rules” involve our relationship well being, thats where everything changes and turns more in live a possessive behavior, it isn’t related to cultural beliefs, as i said, she doesn’t mind me sleeping over at their house as long as she is not home. Moving isn’t an option, we are still students and his mom told him that he should focus on studying, not other tasks that will come with moving out

[Finchie40]

Her house her rules , I dated a girl that had a strict mother even though my girlfriend and I were in our early 20’s her mom didn’t let us sleep together , she would make me sleep in the spare bedroom. Once her Mom went to bed , my girlfriend would come into the room with me and have sex , and fall asleep together , she knew what time her Mom woke up so she would go to her room before she woke up. It sucked but it was her house and rules , Lucky for me my parents were cool so she slept over on my room a lot more times lol

[AI Opinion]

Ah, love, the age-old in-law tango! It's like a drama that never gets old, right? It sounds like his mom has her idea of a perfect "comfort zone" that she's hanging on to for dear life. Talk about a test of patience and love! 🚦 It seems your boyfriend was once all "Let's do this!" but got lost somewhere between debates and fights. As frustrating as it is, this is your boyfriend's gig to smooth out. Have him revisit the convo with his mom, but keep it mellow. Empathy and open chat can work wonders, so keep up that heart-to-heart magic while still holding your ground. Keep the love sparkly and remember, patience, my friend, lots and lots of it! 💕

[HelpfulGirlll]

This situation requires open, honest communication between you, your boyfriend, and his mother, focusing on mutual respect and compromise.

[MrChinaski]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/VWO3nEuWo4k

Something in her style that shows me

[MrChinaski]

More seriously, it sounds like you are not getting much out of your somethingship. There are 4 billion guys in the world to choose from.

[LiamS95]

Move in with me my mom sadly passed already

[Anonymous]

I've never experienced something similar.

[Anonymous]

So he lives with his mom?

[Cherrysherrylady]

Listen to love Dr