Once you’ve cheated on your spouse and crossed the that line, is there no way to turn back?

Question

There is always that feeling that (1) this isn’t my first time, so one more time is fine; (2) it’s his fault for not meeting my needs so it’s okay; (3) no one is going to know; (4) last time was fine, this time should be too; (5) I wasn’t thinking straight, it was a mistake.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Unfortunately some people take cheaters back into their lives praying that they can work things out , it blows my mind but unfortunately it happens a lot , whether that person is desperate or has low self esteem about themselves etc. I met so many married couples and taken couples , where the wife or husband , or boyfriend girlfriend cheated and they were still together. It blows my mind , because I would never take a cheater back into my life whatsoever, but there are a lot of people that will. I been the other guy a bunch of times with lying selfish girls’ that told me they were single , to find out she wasn’t , after we had sex a bunch of times. That would go back to their husbands’ or boyfriends’ like nothing happened. And the ones that did know their partner was cheating on them with me , took her back which blew my mind even more. Like dude are that desperate that you are
Taking back a girl that cheated on you like crazy with me , like wake up man , and kick her ass to the curb where she belongs. Another thing that blows my mind is the fact that there are people that get off on their partner cheating on them as well. It just goes to show how demented and fucked in the head people
Can be.

Fireguy17 · Accepted Answer

not for me. Once you are caught it's so long, farewell. No second chances.
It did not work out well for my ex-wife.
I knew something was going on, just didn't have the proof.
I did the come home early and as soon as I saw his truck I knew.
I walked in, he was trying to back into the closet pulling up his pants.
She asked what are you doing here, which I replied I used to live here, turned and walked away. We got divorced, his wife divorced him, and they never did end up together. And thier lives while ok were just never all that great. Karma!
Me I had my second childhood, I still had my looks, a solid 6 on a good day, a good job, freedom to come and go as I pleased, motorcycle trips across the county, Canada, Mexico, and I did very well for myself over the years.
Karma?
Who knows, but I also have an ex-girlfriend that earned the ex-prefix by cheating.
It was 6,8 months later she stopped in my store; I knew she wanted to get back together, but she never did come clean, or even apologize, so while I was really tempted I just didn't.
That one I still wonder what if... But I made my choice and moved on.

bunnyboo24 · Accepted Answer

Cheating is a beahviour caused by people who lack empathy its not normal. Just like people who "grape" kids. I'd stay far away from anyone who has ever donee that or is doing it. But im not perfect either so am not herre to judge i just would stay away from cheaters same way i would with pedophiles

Rei13 · Accepted Answer

I think maybe some relationships can heal from it depending on whatever the circumstances were that caused it and how they communicated after, but tbh I don’t think there is any going back from that. Even if they never do it again it is still betrayal and the trust is gone

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

My aim on Girls Ask Guys is to sprinkle some love wisdom with a dash of humor! 🤓 Cheating can feel like crossing the Rubicon, but redemption isn’t off the table. It starts with owning up to your actions and having an honest talk with your partner. Love is a tricky dance, right? Those feelings of justification are red flags waving in your face. Trust can be rebuilt, but it’s a bumpy road that requires commitment and open communication. Trust me, turning back is possible if you’re ready to put on those relationship construction boots! 🛠️👢

Summeroflove · Answer

Yeah at that point even if your spouse never finds out you will forever remember it and it will eventually ruin the relationship especially because once someone starts cheating chances are high they will do it again at least sooner maybe later.

All those lines are excuses to either make someone feel better or make themselves look better. In reality, it just shows that someone doesn’t want to take accountability and feels no remorse for their actions. It’s better to face what you have one if there is any chance of working things out.

Even if it ends in divorce chances are you aren’t ready for marriage. Let him find someone who is and work on yourself so if you do find another husband it doesn’t happen again. If he wants to work things out. Communicate… but that isn’t a guarantee.

Ifs a lot better coming from you then him learning about it from someone else

HawkPerception · Answer

No one with any self respect would ever stay with someone who cheated on them. And if they do stay with them, it'll never be the same relationship again.

slatyb · Answer

Why are you still married? What is the marriage providing that you don't want to give up? If you are cheating on him, you are essentially stealing everything he is sharing with you. Would you consider having an open marriage?

"I wasn't thinking straight" -- I don't ever believe that. There is something you are not getting from the marriage that is important to you. Have you asked for it? Could your partner do it for you? If you haven't asked, why haven't you? If your partner cannot, are they unwilling or unable?

beenherebefore · Answer

There's a way to turn back but it takes a lottttt of work and lots of patience because is not something people will be able to overcome in weeks or months. Also you need to accept that when a couple goes through something like this the relationship they had died and they have to rebuild something new and different and that's a huge commitment that not everyone is ready to put up with.

Amieewend · Answer

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virgo2267 · Answer

Majority of women will encourage themselves to believe what they did was not so bad… it was all flesh and sweat, no feelings involved…
While that may be the case, deep down you know you can never ever feel the same for that relationship… and if you were married, you will carry that to the grave, but in reality you know you have no problem doing it again if the eight person came along or seduced you willingly m

WhitneySnow · Answer

You can always stop. It just takes willpower. Or you can divorce him if you’re really unhappy. That sucks for your kids but it’s better than being stuck in a bad marriage.

Unycorn · Answer

If you do it once you would do it again. No moral wall.

Anonymous · Answer

Once you've cheated it changes you permanently. It makes you feel bad about yourself but it makes it easier to do it again. Just don't cheat, that's all I'm saying.

Anonymous · Answer

Anything you do wrong will always cause guilt
And there is temptation to reveal the affairs for relief

But if you can remain strong and keep quiet it will pass

It will also be awkward being intimate with your partner because it's what you did

I know myself. I justified my behavior because of how my wife treated me

I wanted the affair and things at home blew up until I felt I could get what I really wanted

Anonymous · Answer

I will never cheat on my boyfriend but if it's a friends with benefits or something I will sleep with 10 other guys if I want to (I haven't), and I know they're sleeping with other girls.

Ironco · Answer

If you've cheated in the past, you'll always find a way to justify it in your mind. If you fucked up, you are doomed to repeat it. It's just a matter of time before you get caught.

douride2 · Answer

In my opinion once you have cheated there is no way back.

RavVid · Answer

I would say the first 4 operate most strongly.

Miristheiss · Answer

Moot. Irrelevant at that point. Any cheating is already irredeemable.

Staximus · Answer

Somebody who cheats does not value their partner or care about their feelings, the relationship is basically over

msc545 · Answer

Just divorce the husband and fuck all the other guys you want, and leave the husband in peace.

Jennz6 · Answer

You can’t go back but you can move on forward 💃

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

I never cheat if i'm married but yes cheating is crossing the line of no return

driven159 · Answer

no once it's done too late to turn back and it will happen again once a cheater always a cheater

Anonymous · Answer

this is why we need to bring back slut shaming

krin_m · Answer

I never cheated, so I'm not sure. But each person is different and has their reasons for cheating.

Anonymous · Answer

I would never cheat on my spouse, but I'm single... Those who do it should try to apologize, and make peace with their spouse.

Twalli · Answer

You'll always be a person who has justified cheating.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Yes there is a way back but most people won't like it and that complete transparency

Flower7 · Answer

No, you can’t “go back”.

exitseven · Answer

there is no coming back from this.

soe11 · Answer

Yes mo way to back.

wkhan_87 · Answer

No ,, it is always a chance to turn back

Rosemaiden · Answer

Once you've cheated, you broken the trust

Cheerfull009 · Answer

Yes, if both have real love for each other

Anonymous · Answer

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Once you’ve cheated on your spouse and crossed the that line, is there no way to turn back?

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Once you’ve cheated on your spouse and crossed the that line, is there no way to turn back?

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