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Question

A person that’s in a relationship should not be talking to: 1. Their ex 2. Any person who likes them 3. Any person who liked them 4 Any person they used to like

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

This comes down to trust a person whose going to cheat will cheat no matter what. So, if someone’s not being loyal or displaying questionable behavior then getting too defensive when you calmly bring it up. Probably time to plan your exit.

It depends on the context of why someone’s talking to someone. It also depends on peoples standards remember when it comes to relationships everyone’s different don’t try to control someone whose not compatible break it off and move on… People can want different things. That’s called compatibly.

If someone sees someone they know and someone says “hi” and makes simples small talk. That’s one issue. If someone has kids with someone else or was previously married they may have to still interact with one another. But, that depends on how they are interacting as well.

Issues arise where… Someone’s talking to someone for no other reason to talk to them. Especially if they’re hiding it or if it’s at odd hours of the night. If you have a bad feeling you may be on to something. Context matters.

People can remain friends without cheating. But how close are they? And intentions behind it make the difference

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

A partner should be respectful and treat their partner the same way they want to be treated in return , wear each others’ shoes before making decisions so yes boundaries are good, if both people follow them. It’s not control , it’s called being respectful to each other , if there is no respect from either side that relationship won’t last

NoDecision · Accepted Answer

I don't agree. If you have kids with an ex you would be talking to them from time to time, especially if they were young kids. Also, you may know girls from high school/college that were friends. I see no reason to can the friendship because she is a girl. That is ludicrous. However, if he was having sex with her in the past, then it wouldn't be a good idea to keep up with the friendship. Temptation could be a bad thing in that case.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

Meeeeeh. Sometimes you can't help stepping into a situation where you're talking to a guy's ex or someone who randomly likes him... Just look at them with a friendly expression and don't let them bug you. If you feel there's something shady going on, have your guy check himself and check the gal in question. You just stay pleasant.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

I'm here to spread some love and wisdom! When you're in a relationship, open communication and trust are essential. 😊 It’s all about setting boundaries that make both partners comfortable. Talking to an ex or someone with romantic feelings might be a red flag, depending on your partner's feelings. Remember, mutual understanding is the key here. Just make sure to sprinkle in some respect, love, and a dash of common sense! 🌟

Genie23 · Answer

I don't agree. I mean, everyone had a crush on someone at some point. Having a problem with your boyfriend just because he used to have a crush/like someone or she liked him, is kinda silly. It doesn't mean if they talk again, they'll end up having feelings for each other again. Having a problem with it shows too insecurity and that you don't trust him. If you can't trust your partner, then what's the point of being with him?

AviatorTom · Answer

No, I don't agree. This sentiment is controlling and shows a complete lack of trust. This relationship is doomed to fall.

Jessica405 · Answer

A matter of trust. My guy can talk to anyone. I trust him not to try anything untoward. I am not a control freak!

OlderAndWiser · Answer

"Any girl who likes him" would include mother, sister, and female cousins. If you are establishing boundaries, you need to be more specific with your language.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Those are not healthy boundaries. Only a malignant narcissist would demand as much and only the codependent would accept such demands.

OneViewpoint · Answer

The question is dumb. It ignores realities that exist. What if your man has kids he shares with his ex. Is he supposed to walk away from his children and refuse to speak to their mother regarding parenting responsibilities to soothe your insecurities? Is he expected to cut his ex wife off and be mean to her? What example does that set for his children?

Not gonna happen for most men. You lose that contest. Every time. Your inability to act like an adult will not influence my behavior or sense of morality and ethics.

Amy_Mi · Answer

Absolutely, because loyalty isn’t just about actions, it’s about awareness.

You don’t entertain what once desired you, and you don’t give access to anyone who threatens your partner’s peace.

Respect doesn’t need reminders, it shows up naturally when love is genuine.

Boundaries aren’t insecurity, they’re clarity.

And anyone who argues that point usually benefits from blurred lines.

So yes, if you’re truly committed, keep the past where it belongs behind you.

Because real love doesn’t flirt with history.

LazerBean · Answer

That's kind of ridiculous. People grow and change. Just because a girl used to like my husband doesn't mean she still does, or that she is in any way a threat. Especially if you live in a small town, you're going to end up upset over way too many people by those rules.

zagor · Answer

Nope. I've known a number of people who continued contact with exes in a new relationship. My friend and his wife are friendly with her ex-husband. My sister kept in contact with a couple old boyfriends after she got married, and they in turn with her after they got married.

That's called being a mature adult.

RavVid · Answer

I think they are reasonable boundaries for both guys and girls though you don't say they apply to girls.

I'm a bit confused on one point. Some girls I may not like and I have no reason to think they like me BUT I get erections over them because they have beautifully firm breasts or a tight waist or great legs. Merely aesthetic appreciation is all. I might well dislike them as a person but still acknowledge they have good tits.

Are they OK?

DrPepper12 · Answer

If that person called that behavior setting boundaries that would be the last conversation that we ever had. That's not setting boundaries that's complete control and that's not going to happen.

It says more about the person who wants that and their stark raving mad insecurities.

loveslongnails · Answer

No, I agree with this sentiment: A man should not be dating any woman who believes in the above sentiment. That's not called boundaries, that's you projecting your OWN insecurities and jealousy onto him. People, stay away from anyone who tries to inflict this on you. Your relationship will never last.

Purpleronnie · Answer

Nope , controlling and utter nonsense.  In my humble opinion should anyone believe these to be true then it may mean that your not ready for a relationship built on trust.

DavyJ · Answer

It’s bollocks. I still have a good relationship with my ex-wife. Just because the marriage ended, doesn’t mean civility should. At the end of the day; I’ve known her her for 54 of my 57 years, and that’s a lot of good memories in happier times.

Anonymous · Answer

I would say that's up to her. It's called respect. If she asks you not to talk to them, then don't talk to them. They should respect that.

I went through this with a lady friend I used to know. She had a thing for me when we were younger. We reconnected, but she was married by then. Her husband didn't like her talking to me. I would NEVER come between her and her husband. But I can respect his position so we stopped talking. Problem solved.

RxR0954 · Answer

I’d say doing that while in a relationship is gonna piss some people off, and people have all sorts of reasons to be mad about the same action. But that post truly screams insecure.

exitseven · Answer

No, people have relationships and in some cases they do not end, they just change into something different.

StephanieChick111 · Answer

Absolutely not. He's your boyfriend not your slave.

Staximus · Answer

Well that's pretty much impossible if you share custody of your children with your ex, welcome to real life

glennos89 · Answer

Some people need such rules but some are so trustworthy that such rules are unnecessary

AngryCarl2 · Answer

No, that's silly. But yeah, you shouldn't be in contact with your ex any more than you're legally obliged to.

genericname85 · Answer

why not? cause you're by default assuming they're unable to be loyal or something?

Anonymous · Answer

Absolutely not, if they have kids they'll have to talk to the ex Sounds like a praying mantis, if I'm done with you, F off but if you want to leave me I'll st4b you kind of energy and mentality

nawtee_me · Answer

Not at all, I trust them until I have a reason not to and when I no longer can trust them I no longer need them either…

Anonymous · Answer

No if you try to control every single thing a person does there is no relationship there.

In_Trance · Answer

Generally speaking that's the most retarded thing I've read on this app all week

Butterfly38142 · Answer

He should actually avoid getting too close or flirtatious in his texts which most dudes with female “friends” can’t do

Twalli · Answer

How do I know if any girls like/liked me unless they tell me?

Ironic_Method · Answer

That's called insecurity.

Nikki1989 · Answer

No, absurdity!

DonaldDarko · Answer

Pretty much this, same for his girlfriend.

Ariesman81 · Answer

So controlling. You just want a slave.

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

I'd generally agree.

Jltakk · Answer

I don't have enough game to have either of those.

jazzy34 · Answer

I agree.

Flower7 · Answer

True, I agree.

dudeinohio · Answer

I agree 100%

BarryLiverstone · Answer

I disagree

Anonymous · Answer

Yes...

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