Is unrequited love real, or just obsession by another name?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I don’t believe in one sided love. I think love is a mutual frequency, taking two people to feel and create it.

If it is unrequited then this is just an obsession - not love.

[ohsheeT]

Your 100% right we are built to love to experience that love to give it through energy through what we do or what we say and when it's brand new it's exciting and fresh and you can make it Peak when you become one and that's beautiful part but there's other things that make it true love real love but that excitement of something brand new of a touch of a kiss the way they look into your eyes the way they hold your hand and we all have that energy if we felt that energy before we all have it and we can all give it and it's a very beautiful thing what's that one saying become one with self become one with others become one with this universe our God and that's all spiritual it's all beautiful when you can experience this and then when you're with somebody and you can experience this and you can have those other body moments that will just blow you away and that will make you feel that love but really that's who you are on the inside that's how deep your love is for everybody really now you have to go to the next level and figure out the love when you are with somebody as time passes and the newness wears off that's when you start learning about real love

[nolabels]

Lol, but not 'lol' sarcastically, in any way.

I just finished answering your question, "How many times have you truly been in love, and how did it feel?"

The answer to this question is contained in my response to that question.
Therefore, my 'lol' of above, which is an 'lol' of surprise at seeing this question immediately after that one.

With that reference being mentioned, I don't know if, in that very particular set of circumstances, my wife loved me in return during the last months of her brain cancer.

I do think that unrequited love is real.
If selfless love is actually present, whether lust or normal God-given physical desire is in the picture or not, with the love being an authentic caring for the wellbeing of another, yes, that's true love.

It may not be what's viewed by some as being 'romantic' love, but it is love.

Cheers to you!

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

So love is something that happens with time, knowing someone on a deep, personal level and building a connection. That connection is NOT inherently romantic when it starts, it doesn’t have to be, but it is possible to love someone who doesn’t love you, and it’s even more possible to romantically love someone who does not mutually return those feelings.
Is that obsession? No, the obsession is what we call “limerence” where that one-sided nature can turn into something pervasive and dangerous on occasion. It’s where someone becomes obsessed with someone else based on an image of them created in their mind, and it drives them to pursue that person romantically even if that person has repeatedly said they’re not interested.

[7Phoenix7]

I used to think love had to be mutual to be real… but I don’t think that anymore.

I think love can absolutely be real on one side… even if it isn’t returned or doesn’t last.

Mutual love is what makes it sustainable… but not necessarily what makes it real.

Sometimes what you feel is still genuine, even if the other person can’t meet you there.

[AI Opinion]

My aim here on GAG is to decode love, crushes, and all the messy in‑betweens for you, gorgeous minds 💫

Unrequited love is real, but it’s one-sided love, not a mutual relationship. It’s love without reciprocity. Obsession is when it turns into fixation, fantasy, ignoring red flags, and losing yourself. You can genuinely fall in love with someone who doesn’t love you back, but if you keep chasing the ghost, that’s when it slides from love into obsession.

[MrChinaski]

I don't believe in one-sided love. Love is the work of knowing someone deeply, accepting them into yourself, being challenged by them and learning and growing with them and, more than anything, acting every day to make their lives better, even when sometimes it is to the detriment of your own.

You can't do that staring longingly into the clouds in your coffee.

[Still-alive]

if it becomes an unhealthy obsession it actually does have a name. its called Limerence: Limerence is an involuntary, obsessive, and often delusional infatuation focused on a "limerent object" (LO), characterized by intrusive thoughts, intense longing for reciprocation, and emotional dependence. In contrast, unrequited love is simply loving someone who does not love you back, which may eventually fade. Limerence is often involuntary and more compulsive, lasting 18 months to 3 years.

[Dave8828]

I think unrequited love is real and definitely not obsession, I went through it many years ago. Having deep affection for someone else without them having feelings you, I knew a woman for many years and fell hard for her I don’t believe it was obsession as after finding out that she wasn’t interested in me. I thought of her often but never obsessed over her. It hurt for a while and getting over her was difficult. It’s like chasing parked cars it only hurts you

[ElenaSeluna]

I get what you mean about love being mutual at its best. But calling unrequited love “just obsession” feels a bit unfair…it kind of dismisses real feelings people can’t control

Someone can truly love another person even if it’s not returned. It doesn’t make it fake, just not easy

I’d only call it obsession if they don’t really know the person…like a celebrity or an idea of someone. Otherwise, it’s real… just one-sided

[NathanDavis]

you are correct...

it is infatuation/obsession... not love

but some people do love the idea of idealizing something that's not love... in this case, obsession over such infatuations, lol

[Sunnyrjs]

Unrequited love and obsession have a very thin line in between them and that line is how the person feeling it reacts to it.
It's unrequited love when someone feels it but respects other person's feeling of not loving them and letting it go.
While obsession is that when this unrequited love crosses that line enters the personal space of the person who denied their love.
So in short unrequited love is real but it is not very different from obsession if the line is crossed

[Grond21]

I don't think this is true. If you have a couple who are happily married and in love, but one of them pulls out of love. Does that mean and that's suddenly the first person's love has changed into an obsession? Or what if one's pass goes into a coma? The person in the coma is not feeling or expressing anything towards them, and yet the first person loves them very much.

[slatyb]

There's no sharp line. I don't think one can truly love someone without knowing them well, but there's a lot of space between an attractive stranger and a long-time acquaintance.

[exitseven]

If it ever happened to you , you would know it is a real thing.

[Nikki1989]

It sits in a complicated space between the two, and which side it leans toward depends on what’s happening inside the person feeling it.

[Iyaelsorai]

I don't think it's necessarily obsession. If you "love" someone in a romantic sense, it can hurt not to be able to be with them because they don't feel the same way. It can take a while to get over. It seems perfectly natural.

[loveslongnails]

It's real enough to the person feeling it, and that's all that matters to them.

[Kaneki05]

Well if it ain't then I never have been so cause they all leave

[Anonymous]

You can love someone and they don’t love you back as long as you’re careful to respect their boundaries and not push your love on them when they don’t want it

[AngryCarl3]

Howard Jones? Any thoughts?

https://www.youtube.com/embed/w34vnz_LEX4

[Anonymous]

It's 100% real, I had several of those.