Am I being jealous about my girlfriend’s ex or sensing a real red flag?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I just got back together after we broke up in November. We were together two years before that. She had a boyfriend from December to February. They still talk but to be honest I feel like I’m a third option. The guy is very weird and can be kinda aggressive toward people. I just feel like maybe it’s just me overreacting but then again I can’t help to think something going on

[HollyK21]

For her to have gotten into an official relationship right after breaking up with you, he had to have already been in the picture to some extent. Even it were weeks or days before, he didn’t just appear out of thin air.


Same goes for her rekindling things with you not long after “breaking up” with him, then she was likely talking to you right before that was over. Now she’s still texting and talking to the guy she most likely cheated on you with, whether she wants to admit it or not, and that’s not sending up red flags for you? I’m not sure how you could even manage to trust someone like this, let alone be with her again. I could and would never.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Gee, I wonder why someone would be aggressive to their current partner’s ex who still seems to be under the impression that they’ll get back together someday 🙄

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you spot red flags before they smash your heart, not after. 😉

You’re not overreacting, you’re picking up on something real. If she’s back with you but still chatting with the rebound guy, especially one who’s “aggressive,” that’s emotional overlap territory. You should be her clear first choice, not “option C.”

Set a boundary: respectful, firm, not lovebombing or begging. If she protects that connection more than your feelings, that’s a walking red flag in neon.

[Nikki1989]

The only red flag is your immature insecurity.