Why do people keep their first love blocked for over a year?

[Anonymous]

My first relationship lasted almost 5 years, we were very close. The way it ended was that I had to let her go, because she wanted to see another guy.

I told her back then that we could try and work on it. And that I will always have a place in her heart for me. But she decided not to.

Her and all her friends silent treatment - rude manner towards me is therefore very strange. But I have come to accept it.

I am wondering though, why do people in general keep their first love blocked forever?

[Paris13]

It is a first time love, very special, and after we experience the magic of how it really feels to be in love, we can never forget--and most of the time---let go of the memories---or the person who showed us what love was all about. It took me many years, after I broke it off with my first love to move on and forget him. We were both 13, and after I had written him that "Dear John" letter at 16, my life was never the same for quite a few years. A few years down the road, we did try to get back together, but knew by then, that we were older, more different . I had always compared him to other guys I had gotten wound up with, which I think contributed to the many marriages I ended up having, and the problems in these relationships. There is truly no one quite like your first love. This story is how I am one of the many thousands out there that never could "block" him out of my life, because there was never a day that went by that I didn't still think of him---I still do, even to this day.

[Paris13]

Sorry, everyone..I guess at first, I was a bit confused of 'blocking," thinking "blocking" in your feelings foer first love after it is over. But still, my story of "first love" is interesting...

[Asker]

Beautifull comment. I didn't know that it was even that hard for 'dumpers'.

And I think that it still holds true in this situation. Blocking is blocking...

[Paris13]

Yes, sweetie...I guess it just depends on the person, the situation and..."Where the heart is."

[ambasauras]

First love is the hardest love to get over. Blocking your ex ensures that you don't have to see what's going on in their life. Sometimes it's hard to see an ex that you really love move on with their life without you. I personally block all my exes because of this reason and because since they're an EX, I have no intention of ever seeing them again anyway.

[Asker]

I see where your coming from. And this is the logic many people follow.

I just don't see the reason why you'd want to never see that person again if you still love them. Love like that is very hard to come by and I just don't see the point in self torture.

People say ex's are ex's for a reason, well I think that a LOT of the times this reason is a simple misunderstanding which could easily be resolved if there'd be communication.

[ambasauras]

I personally find it too hard to continue seeing another person regularly when I still love them. Some relationships are unhealthy in the sense that you can love someone who only hurts you. If someone is hurting me more than they aren't, they have to be cut out of my life so I can move on with closure. Blocking someone isn't unloving them, it's just moving on because it's what's best.

I totally agree that break ups are usually major misunderstandings, but some misunderstandings just can't be

[Asker]

Yes I definitely agree with that the person you love shouldn't be hurting you emotionally/physically.

But in any other case, I think it can just be worked out with more effort. People give up too easily. And I can say it over and over again, but it won't change that fact unfortunately. ^^

[RositaV]

To move on. Can't move on if you always seeing the person or hearing about them.

[deWho]

If you can go a full year...you know can move on. Think about it...every birthday, anniversary, occasions, holidays...gatherings...one full year you know you can move on. You need to block her. Symbolically and literally. She has moved on...this will be your closure.

[Anonymous]

Because it's easier to move on that way.

[Asker]

In general I think you are right.

In my case it's probably the case too. But you'd think she'd remove all things that have to do with me then. But I she still has my family as friends.

And no, she didn't forget them, I asked her to remove them if she doesn't want anything to do with me wayy back.

[Opinion Owner]

On Facebook?

[Asker]

Yea indeed, Facebook.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, Facebook isn't necessarily an accurate way of analyzing things, but just because she has your family as friends on there doesn't mean she's not over you. It likely means she either a) just never defriended them (or thought it would be rude to) or b) was close with them and doesn't mind the possibility of their activities showing up on her newsfeed.

[Asker]

She moved on immediately and had a date after 5 days. So there is no real question about that.

But to come to your points:

a) She did defriend my mother and brother (so I doubt she is thining about being rude).

b) She wasn't close with them at all, she might have just met her once.

[Opinion Owner]

So she still has other family members as friends, then?

[Asker]

Yea, my uncle and an aunt and two or three nephews!