Polls: Relationships

This may be a more a personality and disposition question than "Men/Women", but educational for some I suspect. I know my wife, so all good there!

Is this what many men do? Give up authentic parts of who you are and your personality just so you have a real chance with the women to end up in a relationship or marriage? Altering yourself like that by destroying who you really are to not being truly yourself just so you have a relationship, marriage and or kids? Is not getting a relationship or marriage or the end of your bloodline thanks to you being your true self really so much worse than being with a woman loving you being your fake self and risk getting divorced and becoming a pay slave for when either she finds out you're not who she thought you are or you fall apart from imitating like that?

And before you say "What is this Nonsense? Men don't do that" what if i told you there are men, that don't show you that they've sacrificed parts of who they are as much as they don't show feelings? Point being you are probably unaware, that some men gave up parts of their personality and who they are and are actively putting up an impressive facade version of "manly man" of themselves for you girls. Anything just to be in a relationship or marriage or not risking the end of their bloodline.

I proposed to my now-wife on Friday, March 10, 2023 around 6:30 pm in the Bonefish Grill in Gainesville, Florida. Just like in the movies from the 1930's and 1940's, I got down on one knee the middle of that very crowded restaurant, make a few very brief comments, and then asked. . . while the restaurant manager (who knew my plan in advance) video'ed the event. I have no idea what I would have done if she had said "no," and it was my good fortune that she agreed to become Ms. OlderAndWiser.

Have you ever proposed and been rejected, or received a proposal and rejected it? Did the rejection ultimately get reversed, and the proposal was accepted?

Looking back on that experience, do you think the rejection was the right response? If so, why? Do you look back with regret and wish it had not ended with rejection?

I want to get feedback on my partner:

- She’s not keen on me seeing friends, for my safety and would rather I met them with her. She also uses the find my iPhone feature with me.
- She messages me and phones various times per day, and gets frustrated if I don’t reply quickly, she says it’s to check I’m ok,
- She tracks my spending on her, to check we’re in budget. Even if I a buy a coffee she’s brings it up and asks why I bought it.
- She’s says if I don’t spend $$ on her birthday present I don’t love her. Also said her birthday needs to be “perfect” with hundreds of balloons etc and fancy cake.
- She doesn’t like me having a female friend at work, has told me to stop going to lunch with her. Said it’s to ensure I don’t “cheat”. She messaged my friend at work on Facebook to ask about me.
- My partner doesn’t like me following other girls on social media even friends.
- She told me I can’t have anyone better than her.

Is she a good partner? I’m really conflicted as this is my first relationship. My female friend said there is red flags everywhere, is she right?

I guess people on Fox think this is cringe?

and guys would you ever go shopping with your partner?

I would suggest that it is. Years ago, Before i met my wife, I believe i was 26 at the time, was in love with a woman who i wanted to marry, We had been together for two years at the time. We had talked repeatedly about spending our lives together and getting married, even having children. So I set up a romantic outing with all of her favorite things, Got down on my knee and proposed to her. She turned me down. I got up, I said nothing, I walked away. Leaving her where she was. I think she had to walk home. She was pissed at me, She called me, and i politely explained to her that i was done with her, that if she didn't want marriage, i was not going to waste my time with her any more. I told her that she was essentially dead to me, and that her stuff would be in a box on my front porch (she lived with me about 50% of the time). As of now, i am 41 and she is 38. She is still single, No children, No family, Alone. From what her friends told me about her situation, she also attempted suicide a few times and spent time in and out of the hospital. This is the life she condemned her self to. I have ZERO sympathy for her.

My opinion is this, If the man proposes, does everything right, makes an effort, And she says no, Any further association is a waste of time, and she becomes unworthy of marriage.

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Its a thought experiment. If you vote anything other than no amount of money could make me cheat you dont belong in adult relationships or marriage.

And if you vote, comment.

Do you prefer pretty or sympathetic looks in a friend or partner?

I daydream and think about romance a lot and having that one person that is my partner in crime forever. I have no interest in being with multiple women. But I find most people just want something temporary or non-serious. Is this hopeless and I'm being unrealistic?