Is it wrong of me to find it offensive when someone says "I'll pray for you"?

Question

I was raised catholic, I have read the bible. I don't believe in a God, I am not completely denying the fact that there might be something, but I think all religions are man made and nonsense.

lightbulb27 · Accepted Answer

some people are pushy, I had that at catholic as well. Christians I was around were less pushy, but some still are "head strong" and opinionatd... annoying. it's better to ask if they can pray rather than say they will or explore to gain understanding of why you think that way.

Jesus handled this appropriately by "dusting off his shoes" and walking away.
Not convinced he spent effort praying for people "whose hearts were hardened", heck, he was going to walk by blind people on his mission... the people reached out to him! " He was wise enough in that time to realize, the person has to want to believe, that's the question he posed to them over and over "do you believe". That's the salvation. If you don't then that's that.

So, it's your right, I don't blame you at all... faith is a challenge, religion can be a mess, full of issues. But I believe it and I see the value in it. I'm glad for you that you were handed a free country, with options and not forced into some other belief.

Wester1967 · Accepted Answer

No. Prayer is an easy out. It doesn't do anything. It might have an effect on the person doing it - similar to meditation. But it does not go externally. It's also a way to "look" sanctimonious and self righteous and posture like you are religious or something.

People in my home state do this all the time. Including my performative religous mother. And nothing ever gets done and mostly the state is a giant mess.

MY mom constantly prattles on saying prayer "really works". It doesn't. It's a lame cope and magical thinking BS

Medicalbug · Accepted Answer

As a rule, I think it's nice of someone to want to help me in any way they can. Some people honestly believe they accomplish this through prayer, so I'm not offended at all. I'm not religious, but usually, it's kind of an honor to be included in a religious person's prayers and not an insult (unless they are praying you slip and land on a turd).
That said. There is a culture of saying "prayers" in some places that seems almost dismissive and lazy - as if the person can't be bothered to say or do anything else. I'll see an army of people saying "prayers" when someone is sick, but not a single person bothers to bring them some Advil or soup.

CherryK · Accepted Answer

Oh im not religious either but im spiritual. I believe energy is transferrable and so i know prayer acts the same way. So i might say ill pray for you if i know they're religious. But i also say sending love or sending healing. Seems like these snooty catholics are sending clarity in your life? I don't know. As long as you feel content with your beliefs of the universe you're good. But your gut is right when they say it as if you're a lost soul that needs help. Its demeaning then.

Staximus · Answer

If they say it when you're having problems or something bad happened, they have good intentions. Sometimes it's condescending if they say it when they think you should be religious. Also sometimes they are saying it because they are actually worried about you going to hell. Their intentions are good, but they don't really know if you're going to hell; so it sounds dumb and may cause frustration. You must forgive the unenlightened and the stupid because they truly do not know the error of their ways, and that error in this case is the passing of judgement.

Lonewulf57 · Answer

No, it isn't as I find it offensive too. It's them pushing their religious concepts on you. Period. You shouldn't apologise, it's THEY who should apologize to you. They should also ask their deity for forgiveness for using them and their religion as a weapon against you.

CountessSarah · Answer

No, it's totally justified to be angry when you hear that.
Because it's code for 'Fuck you'.
It's always the theist trying to get the last word in when they're running away from a losing conversation.

It's transparent, theists, and we know exactly what you're trying to do/say. Knock it off.

Rocambole · Answer

I think that is rude, even if you don't believe in God, if someone is praying for you, they wish you well.

Its like someone giving you something for birthday with good intentions, but you say it is trash and throw it away. There is no reason to do that. Just go along with it and say thanks.

Cherry234 · Answer

Some people have bad intentions. If they're being self-righteous or condescending then you have every right to be upset about it. They're the people who push their religious beliefs onto other people. They're intolerant and I suggest you stay away from them. There are some people who have good intentions though and genuinely care about you when they say that, like if you're going through a difficult time.

IMuser · Answer

Just simply interpret it as "i wish the best of luck for you"

As for your update and their try to mock you, i don't believe that their "praying" will change your mind. Let them have the satisfaction of knowing that you are not offended by them BUT you still are an atheist

Citizenkirk · Answer

No, it depends on how someone say "I Will Pray For You" if they know you are not a member of their faith, and they say it in a condescending manner, than it is an insult being directed at you.
If someone is genuinely concerned about you, and too much of a dumbfu-- to find out what you believe before making such a statement, than they are not intentionally insulting you.

AndrésC64 · Answer

I agree with what you said in your update. If they said it in a genuine way, like if I were going through something difficult then I would be okay with it. But if it were said in a condescending way then I would definitely be offended. By the way, I was raised Catholic too.

SmokyOne · Answer

It offends me too. It feels like a total cop out, like I could do something that makes a difference but that would burden me so I'll just say this meaningless gesture and all the other selfish people will rally behind it, patting each other on the back in a giant red-faced circle jerk of hypocrisy.

Derekk · Answer

Depends on context. Some of them mean well with it, and others will say it condescendingly or disapprovingly, or to make themselves seem like better people after an argument.

DrPepper12 · Answer

I HATE people SAYING THAT!! I farted for you, same effect. It's stunningly narcissistic and offensive.  I'm not afraid. I'm not a child. Your fairy tales have no power here. Grow up.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah... you’re a very cynical person. You don’t know what they are praying for for you. You only assume they are judging you and hoping you come back into the fold. They could just as easily be praying that they hope you have a good life or don’t have anything unfortunate happen to you. Just say “okay, cool” and move on.

Guy13 · Answer

You do realize that Self-Preservation, what you are doing now in withdrawing from Prayer on your behalf or religion in whole, demands that there be some form of afterlife…. even martians, reincarnated karma driven or Heaven/Hell Self-Preservation.

call_me_scar · Answer

Depends on how/why they say it if they are saying it after you lost a dog and they don't know you that well then yeah that's fine but if you just told them you don't believe in their God and they say it then yeah fuck that

Miristheiss · Answer

Wrong... right?

I'd say if you have a problem with it... that is just that... it is your problem.
Just don't expect others to bend to your "offenses". They'll probably keep praying for you whether you like it or not.

jshm2 · Answer

Yes.

It's only words, and they are good words. That you are an asshat, with religious aversions is not their fault.

You sound like the sort of dipshit that would argue about someone wishing you a "good day".

Dargil · Answer

'Wrong' is a judgement I do not have standing to make. "Judge not..." But I see no reason to be offended by it. I need all the help I can get.

wankiam · Answer

as an athiest myself i do tell people that say this to me, please dont do it for me but do it for yourself if it makes you feel better

kellytheman · Answer

Maybe it offended but I get if your annoyed by it. I more into science and evolution but I do believe there is god and Jesus was son of God but I kinda don't like people i will pray for you. I rather pray for myself if I prayed that is.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

That's kind of a strange way to respond to someone trying to communicate that they care about you, but I guess you are entitled to approach things however you will.

Tyrael · Answer

It does nothing to effect you, so you might as well just ignore it. Being offended is a waste of energy.

888theGreat · Answer

1) First mistake is being Catholic , which don't really go by bible in first place 2) Second Mistake is not believing.

Wade12345 · Answer

You are delusional. lol. I'll pray for you. lol.

Tamera952 · Answer

Not at all I find it highly offensive myself and not only that, creepy.

slatyb · Answer

I understand how you feel but it’s not worth worrying about. You’ll just be angry all the time. if you want real help, ask for it.

MrtoddsWildRide · Answer

You could try taking it in the spirit it was offered. It means they care about you and even if you don’t believe in God, they do and are attempting todo something good for you.

Jersey2 · Answer

Those people believe you are in danger by not believing in God. Since to you there isn’t a god then it shouldn’t matter. Short version of it: you shouldn’t care.

FreyaRed · Answer

Nope. In other hand if you're living among Catholics you have to tolerate their peculiarities.

Daniela1982 · Answer

You believe what you want. It is what you believe on Judgement Day that counts.

josephinelcajon · Answer

Same as you raised Catholic. I do not mind being told this at all.

Anonymous · Answer

As long as they don't tell you "I'll pray for you to fail at everything", you shouldn't find it offensive.

legalboxers · Answer

Its just a "formality" I know they aren't praying for me!

noohair · Answer

Belief in religions is just opinion and I accept their right to their opinion and I don't take it as superior or inferior. They think it is fact but it does not bother me.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

If you don’t believe in religion like I do, just be polite and say thank you. And carry on

fjb2021 · Answer

No. They mean well and I believe it. So I stay quiet, don't say the same back. Awkward moment, is what it is.

Anonymous · Answer

The back of this word is usually blank. For God's sake, who prays for another? Who wants the good of another?

joeldalton · Answer

It's not "wrong" per se, but it's incredibly rude and immature to get butthurt about it.

Anonymous · Answer

It is if religious context is forced into it, and religious people will only think theirs is the right one. I say "I pray that her parents don't ground her" in the general sense of hoping for something.

driven159 · Answer

yes, they are money makers but the people who say they will pray for you are doing with good heart

Anonymous · Answer

Yea it is, they are only being friendly and wishing you well, just be thankful they care enough to pray for you.

Anonymous · Answer

it depends on the context in which it's said if it's genuine or as an insult for me i don't ever say that as an insult i say that out of genuinity and kindness

Anonymous · Answer

If you don’t believe in a God then why is it offensive if someone prays to it about you?

supercutebutt · Answer

It's annoying. Religions are cults.

Bel88 · Answer

I think I'll pray for you.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I agree with your update.

Wise4myage · Answer

Yeah, that seems stupid.

Is it wrong of me to find it offensive when someone says "I'll pray for you"?

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