Search Results: he said he wants to marry me

I’m not really sure how to put this, but sone of you know I had ashes secersl questions about how you might react if someone you were seeing told you they plan to marry, you told them you do not, and they wanted to continue dating regardless. I found this odd and suspicious bc if you already know what you want and you know it’s not what the other person wants, well you either think they are not being serious or you are not being serious. That’s how I see it tho I know there’s varied opinions.

this situation confused me not just bc he said he def wants marriage but the whole way he spoke about his future plans he is not flaky and he seems kind of traditional so I don’t understand how he’s ok with a situation that doesn’t line up with his plans or values.

he wants to finish his phd and hopefully get married before his grandparents die (he’s not going to just marry anyone but he’s hoping the timing works out bc it will mean so much to them and they mean so much to him. I mean no doubt it’s super sweet it’s just…) he wants to go beck to Ukraine to get narrated have the celebration there & locate work in Europe bc he expects there will be few job opportunities in Ukraine itself and wants to be as close as possible to his family. We both have family from Ukraine but his is immediate family, mine is several generations down, so while I am Ukrainian so I’m not Ukrainian in the same way that he is.

now he’s telling me all this on basically the first time we were in a sort of date (went to the park before I went to work) we have been friendly for two years but I only asked him out a few weeks ago and bc of scheduling conflict it took us a while to get it together.

I did tell him I do not plan to marry for various reasons, he was quite in disbelief at that, also that I’m not sure what my ten year plan is. At the same time, he was very eager to see me again and as of now we will be going in a date next week. But I’m not sure it’s a good idea.

In this story some man's girlfriend didn't accept his proposal for these reasons:

Finding out it was a real proposal and seeing the proof was the only reason she came back. She's putting things on hold at this moment, wants me to keep the ring and ask again in a year from now. She'll make a final decision by then. If she's ready sooner, she'll tell me to ask again but for the meantime only refer to her as my girlfriend.

She can't accept it now due to my past pranking history and carefree attitude. She pointed out that a month before the hurtful proposal prank that made her feel insecured in the relationship, I've made jokes about having Covid too (faking coughing) and acted inconsiderate towards others, had a history of sometimes being late to our dates, sometimes delay on paying some bills and doing things at the last minute even when I had enough time. Meanwhile I've stopped doing pranks and improving, she said I need to change more before she considers marriage. I admit, I was unpunctual with my last bill last month. Lastly, she doesn't really care about the ring nor the cost but thought my proposal was lame and it lacked creativity and enthusiasm, as if I wasn't even trying. She couldn't understand why I was creative with the fake proposal but couldn't do the same with the real proposal, put more effort into it.

She doesn't want to marry him. She's postponing things. He pranked a proposal once and hurt her but when he did it for real, she wasn't excited anymore.

I have seen this stuff said before tho seeing it on the rise lately with videos from pearlythings & femsapian. I discovered them unintentionally pop up in my feed. They are all over & some people seem to gobble it up. Each video is recycling of these points:

Women expire after 25.

A women dating around will not only not help her learn what kind of partner she wants, but will destroy her ability to bond and make her ineligible used goods.

Women should marry young as a virgin, or no one will claim her and her life is meaningless.

If a women chooses correctly, she will derive great pleasure from obeying her husband.

Women having careers is the downfall of civilization.

Men don’t want to marry women who support themselves.

Women owe men their entire lives bc men must support them financially.

A marriage can not be a partnership thus is offensive to a man. A relationship must have a leader and someone who obeys otherwise it Is disrespectful to ken and only hateful loud mouth cheating aggressive women who don’t respect anyone l, want a partner instead of a leader.

Men expect obedience no matter what is happening within the marriage.

If the marriage is abusive, the woman chose poorly.

Young men are not under a time constraint bc they can marry later. They have time to date around.

A man should be a decade or so older then the women to make the marriage work.(despite the fact marriage in average is 3 years age difference plus or minus, either gender)

Women need an older men to lead them bc they are irrational and can’t navigate life.

A real woman will stay by her husbands side no matter what.

Birth control makes women lazy unaccountable & should be abolished.

Pregnancy is 💯 a woman’s responsibility.

—Femsapian has been divorced and dated around a lot.

—Pearly things is not a virgin nor pregnant but calls for abolishing birth control.

… Do these people consider what they are saying or do they not care as long as their audience subscribes.