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Me and my friend have had similar age preferences for years and that was to stick to men our age. I’m 40, she’s 39. People have been telling us for years to date men who were several years older than us. This includes our parents, aunts and uncles, each other’s parents, family friends, church members, etc. she’s even had friends our own age tell her that she should be dating older men (or so she says). I decided to give it try last spring after my same age boyfriend who had two kids and massive debt dumped me for being “too good” for him (I supported his broke ass financially), and I can say my luck changed drastically. Current guy is 55 years old and we both agreed we’re stuck with each other. At the end of summer, I had a party and invited my friend (recently heartbroken about being dumped but a guy our age for a younger girl), my boyfriend, all of his friends and all of their wives LOVED her. Every one of them and myself all thought she was perfect for a friend of theirs who was looking for someone just like her, so we agree to try to fix them up (the friend had met her once before at a charity event we were working). BF’s friend is also 55, retired, financially secure, gets a pension every month, good Christian, still works part time, has his house paid off and is looking for a woman to spoil rotten. So we pitch the idea to his friend, and the friend’s response is “that girl is a catch! She’s a nice girl with a good heart, she’s doing something with her life and she’s ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL! Yes, please fix me up with her.” I mention it to her and try to convince her to no avail, she won’t date him just because he’s 16 years older than her. I told her she needs to be dating men in their 50’s and early 60’s, not our age. She said NEVER. I told her then that she’s a stubborn asshole who’s throwing away a good guy. Opinions? I want to show this to her to make her realize this is true. Women have been marrying older men for years so it clearly works.

I recently entered the talking phase with t 29 and he’s very much his way or the highway type of man and very rarely is open to other opinions I myself am 23 and if I had to be put into a category I would say I’m head strong and similar to the my way or the highway type of thinking so we’ve been butting heads a lot we said are hard limits and what we both want out of this relationship one of the tougher conversations was we both can hold a conversation with just about anybody which is fine just the boundaries were crossed it was stated that we do not entertain people the way we do with each other I was honest and told him I didn’t and he said the same thing yet today I heard a woman say “you were saying tell me you love me on the phone” which for a lot of reasons made me upset I’m not a very over emotional person but my feelings were hurt and he chose to ignore that and call me out about the way I talk to people instead of asking why I was having that reaction I was overthinking so I went out for fresh air and he was ignoring me and my calls I again kept overthinking and felt like how I felt in my old relationship that I was overly emotional and I couldn’t help it cause I was a woman are the type of things said to me and I feel like this situation is pulling me back into the shell I was once in I know t didn’t say those words to me but not being heard or listened to is just putting me in a dark headspace like a doll no thoughts no emotions no nothing yes sir no sir is where my mind is going and I blame myself I blame myself for being so quick to fall back and back burner my feelings like they don’t matter and questioning myself for being emotional im sorry if this sounds like a bunch of nonsense I can’t get the right words of how I’m feeling besides low and unwanted Sorry again for this long post