Search Results: marriage dating

Came across this woman while looking at one of Kevin Samuel's video. Listed below was her comment for the video.

"I have a high value man and I just listen and do everything I can for him. He takes care of me and my daughters better than their father ever did. I am 37 and he helps me with everything so I will do all in my power to show my appreciation. I never called in to Kevin's show to ask any questions. I grew up with my man and him taking in me and my children was a blessing."

My initial thinking was this.

If you grew up with the man who is now your husband and knew him since childhood, why is it you ended up having kids with another man instead of just marrying this guy and having his biological children.

So I asked her this and her reply back to me was this.

"because I wasn't around him daily. We lived in two different cities that were close but still far enough to only see him summers at the Boys and Girls Club we attended. He wasn't the only guy in the city (lol). I also grew up with My Ex Husband (my daughters father). We're all the same age. I was able to spend more time with my daughters father because he was more assertive and went after me.

My husband now was a bit more shy and was also dating someone else. He wasn't my type He was just a nice friend. His relationship didn't work and my marriage ended. We remained friends and hung out on dates. He was always a gentlemen. One day we had too many drinks and now we've been married 7 years. He said he always knew I was supposed to be his wife. We still to this day are friends first."

Now let's say you were this guy in this exact situation with a 37 year old woman with a little girl that is not biologically yours. Your wife appreciates and loves you but you still have to see her ex-husband from time to time when he comes to visit the kids. Would you be ok being in a relationship like this?

I used to dismiss this idea but have increasingly come to realize its merit, and I now believe it explains a lot of the problems we see today in dating and gender relations, and why so many men no longer want to get married or commit. The changes we see in women today compared to the past, the risks to men of marriage, the fact it offers fewer benefits to men now, and the fact that casual sex is so easily available, all have conspired to create a situation where men are taking their gatekeeper responsibilities much more seriously than women are theirs.

Thoughts?