Search Results: will he ever love me

Well, I am in girls wrestling. My coach and I recently met at the beginning of the season (6 months ago). I know, I know, it's weird and messed up to be attracted to my coach who is married but I don't know, I feel like there are some things he does that make it seem like he likes me. I asked my close friends who are also on the team and they said that they do seem to notice that my coach gets close to me, closer to than the other girls on the team when we talk. I do also notice that whenever he talks and I am around, we have intense eye contact. Like when he talks he will only ever look at me when he's talking even with the other girls on the team or my other coach being there. Additionally, my friend and I have noticed that he seems to act weird when I talk about another guy, in a way that he seems jealous.. It's crazy to think this but I think he does get jealous. I know he loves his wife though and he probably only sees me as a kid but it just can't be me right? Like with that, no way. And, when we talk we seem to talk like friends more than coach and wrestler but then again maybe it is just his way of being and friendly.. what do you think?

You know when you have a gut feeling? I’ve been on and off the dating apps for years, it’s come to the point where I’m not as interested & I swipe on matches/reply to msgs every few days. I’ve never had a real relationship, I saw someone for a few months maybe 5 years ago & something told me after I saw him that’d I’d be single for a long time. With him it felt like settling & I refuse to ever be with someone that made me feel like that again.

I had to use dating apps bc I’m not very friendly & I don’t get approached in person. I’m told I’m cute/attractive & I will say I have a very low sex drive (haven’t masturbated or had sex in 5 years). I don’t think this is a huge deal considering this isn’t something that will be an issue that early on, a guy can’t just look at my profile/see me in person & know that right off the bat.

I get matches (never been the issue) but it’s always: ghosting, fizzling out, lack of interest (can go both ways), feelings not reciprocated, just not a good match & some guys are just crazy. I just always have a gnawing feeling like guys aren’t attracted to me, I’d get told once in a while that some guy looked at me/found me cute but they never do anything about it. And I don’t either hence why I’m posting this 🤷🏻‍♀️

TLDR: based off the description, is this something that’s unlucky in love?